Is this benefit fraud?

[ahzixy]

I recently have gotten back together with the father of my kids. We've been seeing each other and he's been staying over at my house. I claim housing benefit.

He doesn't pay towards any of my bills and I don't to his either.

We've always had an agreement between the two of us that he pays £200 per month in child maintenance. That is all he pays to me. In times I have borrowed money like small amounts( but I also do this with my mum and that doesn't tie us financially)

His car is registered at his house, all his bills etc, his work has him as registered at his house.

My name is on my wifi bill, phone bill and I have pre paid metres under my name.

He pays all his council tax etc and gas and electricity which in his one bed flat cost £70 combined but he's paying of a huge debt so he pays £300-400 a month to that.

Things like days out etc or new things for the kids we do go half.

I've also gotten him things through catalog credit like very and Argos since his credit is bad so every other month he will bank transfer money for that but he labels each transfer (I know that doesn't hold much)

We have 3 kids together and he is over often and on his days off takes the kids to and from school.

My close friends would say we are seeing each other but neighbours I exchange polite exchanges would say we are a couple.

I know it's nothing to do with nights spent here it's about finances. I have a lot of proof he pays nothing to my house.

The only thing is I use his Netflix. But before this I used my best friends nextflix too I only changed to his to not lose my place on shows.

The only thing is he's so tight with money even before seeing me he never had wifi. We can prove this also. But to me that looks odd no wifi.

He's also the cheapest person I know with bills. He refuses to have heating on, does washing at his parents house and showers at his gym. Making his bills as low as possible.

My downstairs neighbours told me to my face in April they've reported him living here. Nothing at all came from this so surely it's not fraud??

Is it fraud?? I'm terrified I really don't like this situation and want to get him added asap but we literally couldn't afford to live if he did with his huge debts and until he sells his house.

You don’t know what you’re talking about.

Er no it really isn’t, duh.

It is. It is her own income. Your opinion doesn’t change that.

OP appears to have had a failed name change on page 6, where she responds as anzuu.

A quick search of this username takes you to her other thread where she complains about having to do all of the housework and cooking in the house for her OH and how he won't even watch the kids for half an hour so she can go meet friends. Any reference she makes to them being together in her thread she refers to them being in 'the house doing x, y or z'.

It's quite clear OP is absolutely living with her OH and has created a false set of facts to present to us here as she I tends to present to the DWP should they investigate.

That said, your OH sounds like an abusive idiot and you need to get rid of him. It'll be him not you in trouble for this

@Autumndays123 as far as I can see the only major difference is the parentage of the children. However I read the hmrc guidance posted and it said:

"Joint responsibility for a child or children (who may belong to either or both of the couple) may be an indication that the couple is LTAHAW or LTACP, but it is not conclusive proof. Relevant factors may be:

parentage of the child or children.whether, and how, the couple exercises joint responsibility, for example:

who visits the school or delivers/collects to and from the school

who would the school contact in an emergency

who arranges and takes the children to and from medical and dental appointments

who exercises control of or offers guidance to the children

who the Child Benefit Office has as the alternative payee

who provides financial support/pocket money/pays for treats

who buys the clothes and or toys.

So it seems to suggest that biological parent isn't relevant. My partner definitely does things for my children, but I am the one who does all the main day to day parenting. Now I am worried!

That's hmrc guidance, not dwp.

Dwp work to a completely different set of criteria to establish the facts

@Allthegoodnamesaregoneffs I am on TC so this is the relevant guidance for me.

That throws a whole new light on it, seems the OP hasnt quite been honest here or over PM,

As the great Dr House says "Everybody lies...."

@Allthegoodnamesaregoneffs I was honest through messages.

I've never once in my other post which I changed my name in because I was embarrassed about my situation ever said he stays here or lives here all the time.

I never said he does the house work. I said I cook for him every time he's over and I've had flat mates the deal is one cooks one cleans the dishes. I made that point to say he doesn't see it as helpful to wash up. He doesn't see it as helpful to make dinner. Even if he makes a snack when he stays over I have to clean it up. Was my point.

We never go to his house because his house is too small and kids stuff is here in my house. And it makes no sense to pack 3 kids and mines stuff for 3 days a week to come home. When there school nursery etc.

Nothing at all in my post implied hee here ALL the time. Everyone on here is just so quick to jump in on someone and honestly really quite nasty.That's just a nasty thing to do

Maybe I am an idiot and I'm desperately trying to leave him but by no means did I lie or say in that post he's here ALL THE TIME.

I ever referred to it as MY HOUSE. said when we've split before he doesn't take it on himself to do anything other THAN VISIT.

He has his own house. He stays there. Pays bills there. I've been on and said he stays here often.

Nothing at all in the slightest implied that I complained what it's like WHEN HES OVER and stays the night not when he's here all the time.

This is why I'm terrified to report it look at how twisted this got. Honestly terrifying how things get twisted.

I'd also not expect someone who's over and maintains there own house to do the house work. Tidy up after the kids if they play a game, yes. But not do house work.

But cleaning your own dishes and offering to make your kids dinner seems like an adult would do. I wash dishes of my friend cooks when I visit it's basic manners to at least offer.

Don't expect or say he does the household washing or hoovering etc. just if you use a dish wash it and make dinner after your children. I'm sure HMRC would see that as reasonable too no? Or they like the helpful people on here who would twist that too?

If I tell hmrc im fed up of him never taking the kids out of the house or ruining our nights in will they see that as him being here all the time too.

I just wanted some advice on this but instead it's just shaming, twisting and almost bullying vibes. Lesson learned I won't ask Mumsnet for help again.

Ok, if you think you are doing nothing wrong, phone DWP on Monday and tell them the situation and see what they say. You will get peace of mind then at least.

Well tbh you’ll be needing a solicitor shortly not mumsnet by the sounds of it

You're fine op as he can prove he lives elsewhere.

@Autumndays123 that is my plan and if they say yes he's been living here I've been advised that I will have to make payments back of the money I shouldn't have received. I don't plan on lying or trying to get out of it because I honestly did not realise if I was committing fraud that I was and judging by comments on this thread it's a common mistake and you're allowed to make mistakes. I'm not planning on lying if I ever got looked into I'm going to present the facts as they are and if I have charges then that's my own stupid fault and I honestly can't believe I was silly enough to make it.

Since I won't lie my way out of this I won't be given court charges etc or lose my benefits it was a genuine mistake. I really truly did not mean to ever be in a situation that could be seen as fraudulent and for that I am more than willing to pay charges and feel silly.

I've also been told from my situation it could more than likely not be seen as that. Judging by the facts of my situation and if that's the case than great I'll feel a lot better and the guilt of this gone.

Do you work for DWP or council because the others are saying different to you that do work there.

Don't do this if he genuinely lives elsewhere and can show he pays rent and council tax there.

It seems like you are trying to play semantics by reinforcing that he isn’t at yours “all the time”.
He clearly works away and it comes across that he is with you pretty much all of the time he is actually around and not working.
He has no internet, doesn’t use any energy, the fact that you even specify that he doesn’t wash himself or his clothes at his own home is weird.

It definitely comes across as you trying to sell the story of him not living with you imo.

Second this. That list is all rubbish. If he can show he pays bills elsewhere op is fine. Nothing to worry about.

@HiveBee what would I need a solicitor for?

People that work at DWP and council have already said most likely he won't be seen as living with me and if so it's just I'll be charged for making a mistake and I'm more than happy to do so I just feel incredibly silly.

The comments on this make it seem you can't make a mistake or be misinformed I was told by someone I knew he could "in all honesty" on his holidays be here the entire time as long as he's seen as paying all bills to his house etc. which he is. He pays none of mine. It's purely the £200 for child maintenance. I now think just hearing that from someone who works with the council I don't feel covered enough and heard conflicting views and honestly from this thread is seems like there's no straight set rules so easily to mistakenly break them. I also asked housing officers on the matter who told me this too and said it's all fine but at that they are Hosuing officers not investigators for DWP. Most likely are right but still a chance and I don't want to take that.

Again the 3 nights has been mentioned, there’s no 3 night rule. He can’t stay for 3 nights a week. I don’t know if this was a thing in the past but there’s no oh he can stay 3 nights a week

No it was a made up thing people said but there was never a 3 night rule.

He can stay whenever you want op

Yes it doesn't matter how often he stops over . He should be paying towards the rent. I've had a client done for fraud for this very thing the evidence? They ate together

@luxxlisbon there's no story to sell, I'm saying the facts and defending the fact he doesnt. I was accused of lying and I'm saying how I'm not lying.

I would say we are in the "seeing" each other part of the relationship where he is staying over it just so happens we have kids and because of that I think he should do their washing etc. my friend is seeing a guy and both stay over at each other's housing. No one would say they live together and he is there more than my partner is over. Her boyfriend is over 5 days a week and any holidays he can get he's there. Days he's not there she's at his. They don't live together. No one sees them as doing that.

He's not had internet long before me. It was outstanding to me too he lived like that.

Him washing his clothes at his parents is his business, his mum wants to save him money as much as she can that's all, she has a tumble dryer too and is just taking care of her son.

They should appeal as that's not the rules 😱😱

Are you the same poster from the other day but the partner apparently lived at the parents house and worried CM looked like it covered rent?

Not saying you are but this is really similar.