In thinking my manager is hugely insensitive for wearing these things into work?

[Mandarinthyme]

Our department head is very young and glamorous and is fairly new to the company. We know her salary range as it was stated alongside the job advert (a six figure salary whilst the rest of the team are lucky to earn a quarter of that). Every day she swans in to the office like she’s dressed for the catwalk, different designer handbags (the very obvious types - think Gucci, LV etc), Rolex watch, Cartier bracelets, designer belts and shoes. Not to mention the perfect nails, hair and everything else that we just cannot afford these days.

Meanwhile our large team is underpaid and overworked. The recent financial climate means many of us are struggling to heat our homes, worrying about mortgage/rental price hikes and generally having to really cut back. We are all office based and this is something we talk about frequently in conversation, so she’s completely aware of this. She’s previously had the cheek to say that we are all feeling the pinch given the financial situation, which is an absolute insult when she rubs her wealth in our faces 5 days a week.

AIBU in feeling completely incensed by this and wondering how on earth she can think it’s appropriate?! The whole team are upset with this and considering raising it with HR.

Bat the girl down to size, reduce her salary and redistribute it by sounds of it 😂

The problem is your disparity in wages not what clothes someone chooses to purchase with their wages

Start a rumour that her designer branded stuff is all fake. She's will quickly learn it is more suitable to be discretely well dressed.

You have mentioned all the way through this that you and your team mates are struggling financially and feel anxious. You are taking out your anxieties on this person. You do sound very jealous. You're actual issue is that you are not getting paid enough. If she started wearing Primark to the office....you would still not be being paid enough. If she came into work naked...you would still not be being paid enough.

Jealousy is useful in highlighting what we want... Turn it into motivation to either fight for better pay in your current role or fight for promotion elsewhere.

I also can't help wondering if she was a man who drove to work in a massive Range Rover and wore Armani suits if everyone would be conspiring to go to HR about him.

Wow. Mean.

a case of sour grapes

Everything here is spot on!!! 👏👏👏

Reading with intrigue

I can imagine it is annoying but it is because you are all feeling bad about yourselves if I am being obvious, as you said what with bills etc if you were rich yourself I doubt you would be thinking this about her. She probably feels all your daggers at her. It is similar to alot of things,should people not mention their baby because someone can't have one, mums when someone mum has died, I know we can all be considerate but really she can wear what she wants.

O the whole work hard stereotype again people on lower salaries don't work hard do they? I will never forget some of my colleagues laughing at a consultant driving a banger she could probably buy most of the car park . Braggart and shows off are boring tacky much more classy to be understated.

I also can't help wondering if she was a man who drove to work in a massive Range Rover and wore Armani suits if everyone would be conspiring to go to HR about him

Probably discussing him about how no one would kick him out of bed.

OP, you are being ridiculous and your post comes across as pretty sexist. I know guys that buy made to measure suits and wear a good watch and expensive shoes. Would you be reporting them to HR too?

Smacks of jealousy.

If she earns a higher salary her lifestyle will have different costs - her mortgage bigger, her car loans greater etc etc.

Very often you find people who are on six figure salaries mix with people socially and in their families who are on similar.

There is social pressure to put kids into private school, have the designer handbags, always have the nails/hair etc done.

And very often a lot of designer items are on hire purchase or credit cards as general living costs are greater. It’s smoke and mirrors.

People in all walks of life are under pressure - those on six figure salaries will be at risk of losing their homes and will have to change their lifestyles too.

Please stop being so fixated on the material possessions of someone else. If there is wage disparity then take it up with the company… it isn’t her fault.

She has obviously got the job because she is qualified for the role. Being that she has earned it, shouldn’t she be able to buy what she likes?

You don't know people then. It worked / works.

As evidenced here ;)

You seem mightily irked... what is it that's upsetting you so much?

Yes I think you should report this to HR. I expect they’ll agree with you, discipline her and tell her she must only come to work in future looking older, dowdier and in threadbare clothes. Go right ahead. 👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻😂

You say you’re not jealous?! Of course you are! Why on earth else would you care what she was wearing.

I’m sorry to blunt, but she made a decision that afforded her this life style. You had equal opportunity to make the same decision and you did not. I don’t see how you can begrudge her wearing what she wants without without stating it’s jealousy.

Wow you’re team sounds awful, very bitter and begrudging this woman her success. All of you need to mind your business and focus on your work / own lives. Is she doing a good job? That’s all that matters. If anything, take it to HR because you’ll quickly find out she probably has a case against you for bullying and stirring the pot.

FGS. This is different, it’s done in a very blatant ‘in your face’ way that is not appropriate. I’m sure a men’s tailored suit would not have branding all over it. I give up.

YABVU. Would have this attitude if it were a man?

If there is such a disparity in circumstances then it is a little bit insensitive to be particularly showy but it’s really not an HR issue. You cannot tell people not to wear expensive/designer clothes because it might upset people as long as they are professionally decent acceptable clothes. I’ve worked with people who’ve chosen to work crazy overtime and not ever go out to be able to get a designer bag or who have received expensive gifts/inheritance or have bought second hand off eBay etc. so it’s not always showing off about a high salary.

“I also can't help wondering if she was a man who drove to work in a massive Range Rover and wore Armani suits if everyone would be conspiring to go to HR about him.”

this.

Didn’t you post about this before the other month?

Go to HR and report back.

Why are you giving the branding any attention? Why are you looking up the brand of her belt on Google?
Why are you not actually getting on with your job instead of this creepy focus on what your manager is wearing?

This is absolutely atrocious. You have no idea what this person has gone through personally or where her wealth has come from. Even if it is from work, it is none of your business! People can inherit or be awarded money (large sums) for many MANY reasons that doesn’t always involve loosing a parent 🤦🏼‍♀️ She may also just have more money than you because, you know, she has a better job?? You come across so bitter and close minded in your post and replies. I actually feel sorry for you to be this obsessed with other peoples lives. You and your team need to have a serious think about what the real issue is and it sure as hell isn’t your bosses fashion choices..

I think you really need to get a life OP. Or maybe a new job