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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Childcare workers kissing children

101 replies

1Dream · 20/10/2022 12:23

Now not in a weird perverted way but more of a maternal mother figure way do you think this is okay?
My 2 daughters go to a catholic childcare centre (unsure if relevant) here in Australia where it's mainly older ladies that work there.
When my kids go up to their favourite educator for a hug, the educator gives them a big hug and a kiss on the cheek which I think is lovely and sweet of them and it makes me feel good that I'm leaving my children with such caring nice ladies looking after my children.

I mentioned this to my mother in law and she thinks its strange as it's not their child. So who's unreasonable?

OP posts:
LadybirdsAreNeverHappy · 23/10/2022 00:21

I would not like for my 3yo dd’s pre school teacher to kiss her. The teacher will often give the other kids a little cuddle if they need one which I would be fine with but dd has made it abundantly clear that she doesn’t like it and the teacher respects that.
I think it depends on the situation; what the child is like, how much time they spend together etc. A kiss on the head or something if they had that kind of relationship and it was a natural, spontaneous kiss wouldn’t bother me, it just isn’t like that with dd and her teacher.
Your instinct seems to be that you’re fine with it, so definitely go with that.
Not the same thing, but when she was a small baby, I used to have to bring dd to a clinic once a week, and when one of the nurses was looking after her she gave her a big cuddle and kissed her face. I was surprised at the time and it made me a bit uncomfortable but afterwards I thought on balance I would rather a paediatric nurse be affectionate like that than very cold and clinical.
It must be difficult to provide care for people and at the same time be very strictly professional in how you calm and comfort them. I had one midwife with me when I was in labour. I was terrified and couldn’t have any pain relief and she was great. At the end she gave me a big hug and kissed me on the cheek. Technically she probably wasn’t supposed to do that either but I’m glad she did. It was a lovely moment.

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