Checkmate For DD

[TheShellBeach]

Reminiscing...........,,,twenty years on:

I recall when DD was thirteen she told me once that she was ill, so I let her have the day off school. Despite having had a "terrible headache and awful period pains" she recovered remarkably quickly and I realised by mid-morning that she'd been having me on.

The next day she asked me for a note to give her teacher, so I wrote the following:

"Dear Mrs. X,

DD was absent from school yesterday because she was pretending to be ill. My investigations suggest that this was very likely because she had failed to do her homework the night before.

Yours sincerely,

The Shell Beach"

Mrs. X was delighted with this missive and apparently pinned it on to the wall in the staff room. DD was less delighted when she discovered what I'd written, but she never tried that one on again.

I think some people have a very low bar for genius.

👍🏻

Why would anyone be reminiscing their shit parenting 20 years later. Bloody odd!

I think most MNetters have a good sense of humour; that your post was light-hearted was not at all clear, and surely you must know that plenty of children are subjected to humiliation.

@Peashoots yep couldn't agree more! I was parented this way, my mum has a fantastic sense of humour! I'm 46 now and I can honestly say I bet those kids are far happier than the wishy washy, let the kids rule mentality that is around today! Well done op!

If I did this to either of my kids they'd probably laugh about it as they'd know they'd pulled a fast one and got called out on it!

Adrian Mole! Xmas prez for my DD. Thank you MN for this reminder.

Humiliation for power purposes is rather different to feeling humiliated when you done something wrong and get caught out

Far better to have that experience young as part of a supportive family than to be protected from everything until you hit the real world

Bloody brilliant, bet your Daughter now has a strong work ethic unlike the pampered angels of the soft arsed mother brigade.

Adrian Mole was published 40 years ago.

One of the many reasons she no longer bothers with you?

God what nasty posts on this thread.
if child is old enough to skive off school she’s old enough to be called out on it. Its called consequences!
The dramatising that this was a humiliating event with potentially life long repercussions is utterly absurd.

OP I know you say it's "light-hearted" but actually I do feel sorry for your daughter in this.

And especially that you are still thinking about it 20 years later.

Yes 🤣🤣🤣🤣

My daughter does this all the time ffs she knows the school nurse by 1st name lol 🙄

Question is did she learn her lesson?

Oh is she suffering from ptsd and requires weekly counselling over it ?

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Yes!!
FFS She wouldn't try it on again would she?
Better now than when she starts work and doesn't progress due to crap work ethic.

Awful, awful parenting. Two bullies ganging up on a child. No wonder she didn’t feel able to tell either you or her teacher she hadn’t managed to do her homework.

Maybe not. But out of fear of being shown up, nothing else. That doesn’t really make kids into good people. I prefer to teach my kids to do things for the right reason, not because they’re scared of what I’ll do if they don’t do it.

Some comments on this thread are why many teenagers have zero resilience and go into the workplace entitled, having no idea how the world actually works.

I think it's brilliant.
Well done OP.

I totally agree with this, I bet we can pretty accurately tell the age of posters on this thread by their responses!

This.
And you know why I skipped school and pretended to be sick? Because I was bullied, but was worried noone will believe or be able to help. Or they'll tell me that I just should be stronger and more assertive. I hope my kids will be able to share those things with me.

Do you mean those that didn't immediately understand the OP was referring to Adrian Mole, a book that was published 40 years ago?

No. You know fine we’ll what I mean, but if this makes you feel superior, I’m glad I was able to make your day.
(and Adrian Mole was shite, it came out when I was the same age as “him”)

As a social worker and education professional, I want to note that in general, if there was a loving , secure and sensitive relationship then this would not/should not result in the extreme humiliation/mental health issues that some posters are talking about.

Children don't need to be covered for all of the time, how do we know OP hasn't covered for her daughter hundreds of times and then cottoned on to not completing homework and skiving? Children do need to learn hard lessons at some point. And it does them no favours to lie for them unless there is a mental health need/sensitive matter.

At 13 years old, bar any additional needs, a 13 year old should not need to have a parent reminding them daily re homework. It is secondary school and the run up to college, where a lot of the learning is placed back on to the young people.

Of course, if this is one thing in a long line of abuses/humiliations then yes, it's an issue. However if it's not, then it's just a teenager who has been caught out.

I'm 34 and all my school friends had read Adrian Mole in our teens, so had been in print 20 years. What's your point?