Whole class party (few rsvp)

[immigrant002]

My child has been asking for a birthday party he just started reception and since his birthday is so close to the start of school i thought it would be better to invite the whole class and book a hall and an entertainer bouncy castle etc

I gave the cards with my number at the bottom for rsvp . Out of 30 children 6 replied should i assume no one else would be coming ? Surely people do not just show up ? I would always reply to an invitation even if i was not going so am not sure what to make of this

I am also a bit gutted for him he is very shy and he didn't know anyone from before as he was going to a different nursery he mentions a few names of boys he plays with but none of them replied .

I hate this, it's unbelievably rude. Personally I'd ask the parents at drop off or pick up. "Oh hi Jane just wanted to check you got Jimmy's party invitation, I just need to confirm numbers".

What date did you put to rsvp by? Some will leave it until the last minute

The thing is i dont know anyone they all seem to know each other and i am far too shy to ask that ! I thought the party would be an opportunity to meet people as well . Ah i need to get out of my shell and a bit more social for him

This is all well and good but at this stage in reception you may not know who is who. I only do 2 pick ups a week and struggle to know who people are.

@NCAutumn i didn't actually put in a date for rsvp the party is next weekend ! I do hope more people can come

It is rude. I personally make sure I reply asap and definitely by rsvp date.

do you have a watsaspp group? I will remind the mums on there and you get more response.

I wouldn’t assume they weren’t coming though. Some people would just turn up!

This is the type of thing the class WhatsApp group is good for. Put a message on there saying can you let me know if you’re coming to Fred’s party next weekend and you’ll get a lot more replies. It’s annoying to have to chase up replies though.

I learnt my lesson and will always put a date to rsvp by. You will most likely get last minute rsvps.

No whatsapp group as far as i know ! There might as well be one and i don't know about it !

Hmm what do i do with the food and goodie bags if people just show up though ? I invited 30 and 6 replied so how many should i do ?

This is just going to be disastrous and sad wish i did not bother

It's rude but people are living increasingly difficult and stressful lives and if you've a few older kids your youngest's party invites shrink in priority on the to do list. And invitations get lost before they reach parents, or in our house, sometimes either.

I would imagine a couple more will just show up but I would ask your son who he would really like to come and hijack a couple of the parents, systematically at the school gates for the next couple of days. With spare invitations in hand.

If you want to fill the hall I would invite other local friends, neighbours, nursery and cousins etc, but tbh 6 5 year olds can have a lovely time with a bouncy castle and if your little one is shy he might prefer it.

If there is a class WhatsApp definitely use that to remind people. I would also say thank you to the people who have responded- often people do not respond until they know others are going (unfortunately). The cards may not have made it to the parents if they were given to the children- I've found many important bits of paper in coat/ trouser pockets before!

On your own shyness - 100% get it - fake it till you make it.

Do bother! Just do it properly. Should have put an RSVP date, never mind lesson learnt for next time. Go and ask the parents at drop off and pick up. Why not set up a WhatsApp group yourself? Put yourself out there. People aren't going to bite. Everyone is busy, so just speak to people. Easier said than done I know.

It’s tricky as it’s half term and a lot might be away. Can you speak to a nice mum who has replied in the yard. A thanks for saying Charlie can come to Alfie’s party he’s really excited. Might prompt a few to say oh I meant to reply.

You can print out a little slip asking for rsvp for numbers (if not rsvp already)

Hand them out on last day of term. Tricky weekend for a birthday party though since some will have Halloween parties etc to go to. You could put "Halloween fancy dress welcome" or something on it 🤷🏽‍♀️

Lesson learned about the rsvp date although i dont think i would be doing this again !

I understand people are busy i am just asking for experiences to see if people do just turn up ! How would i go about setting up a whatsapp group ?

That is so shitty-

Is there one parent that you could approach? Ask them to spread the word or make introductions?

I think you will have to get to pick up early and bite the bullet and fake your confidence to say "Oh hi! are you xxx mum/dad? Just checking you got the party invite for xx" and take it from there!

Sorry i mixed the dates the party is after they come back from half term 5th of November !

The thing is i would still reply and say i cant make it !

Oh I hate this..I always reply as soon as we get invites because the no RSVP waiting is horrible.

For the people who have replied could you send them a message along the lines of 'looking forward to seeing David at the party. We've not had many replies yet, do you know if there's a class WhatsApp group or other way to get in touch with parents?'

5th November is tricky too as it’s bonfire night. I’d assume most will have plans to go to fireworks or are holding back replying as they are waiting for bonfire plans to firm up. I wouldn’t take personally.

Thats actually good i think i will text one of the mums that replied this ! She seems to always talk to many people at drop off

Ah- I had this last year and it is so rude! I make a point now of getting the invite - confirming and putting in the diary.
if they haven’t rsvp I would say they won’t be coming. by all means have a few spare party bags but don’t stress it. Get kids of food as the adults will stay and help eat it,
I was really upset for my kid but he didn’t seem bothered. It was nice to meet a few mums as like you I rarely manage a pick up so can’t chase them down. I think it helped him to develop friendships with the kids who came. He told me despite the lack of attendees he had a great time so try not to worry,

Honestly it's along time til the 5th. I would try to reply ASAP but know it's so far away, I'd let you know a week in advance. Your party is still two weeks from today!

Isn't that bonfire night? Did you forget when booking because it's the kind of thing families go to, and therefore will already have something in mind. They might be waiting to see if there are any local displays or Bonfires?

maybe it's a good opportunity for you to start the whatsapp group? it's reception and near beginning of the year so maybe no one has thought about it yet. Set the scene, organise it, add people one by one and ask them to add other parents they know. Then your party invite can be the first issue to raise on it!