to think the amount of money im left with by the end of the month is ridiculous?

[yellowcheesepie]

I recently went back to work after mat leave and am sat here wondering how on earth this is worth it ?! after paying all my bills of food, rent, electricity, water, internet, netflix, phone, commute and childcare etc i'm only left with £200 a month to save? i'm not a big spender either, all my income goes on the mentioned above plus £100 spending allowance for myself.

I'm not trying to rant, but i'd like to understand how other working mums do it? is this a reasonable amount to save per month or is there something very wrong in my finances? I live with my DH and we split all bills / expenses if anyone is wondering

No. She pays half of food, rent, phone, electricity, Netflix and so on. It’s not all childcare and if she didn’t work all these bills would still be there. She gets way more than £300 from working.

Maybe. My point is, that without understanding OP’s DH’s position, we haven’t got the full story.

I’m definitely not in the “it’s the woman’s job to care for the baby” camp. Far from it!

I’m just trying to work out the situation.

I suppose your question is rhetorical really, as you don't have much of a choice really, do you, assuming your husband can't afford to support both of you.

Unless you're planning on living off the taxpayer, all of whom do think it is worth supporting themselves and their dependents.

But yes, it would be nice to have more money. You probably should have thought about upskilling before having children.

Friends monthly income was only £45 above f/t nursery for 2 children so £200 sounds ok especially if you have taken out a monthly spend amount

Perhaps I’m not explaining myself very well.

If OP didn’t work, who would pay the bills? I’m guessing her DH could cover them if the childcare wasn’t included (or perhaps even if it was, who knows?). Otherwise I doubt OP would say “what’s the point?” when the point would obviously be the necessity of covering the bills.

So if their arrangement is that if OP works, she gets to keep the remainder after paying half the bills, then working is worth £300 to her, personally, each month.

If she doesn’t work, perhaps DH would pay for it all, but OP wouldn’t have her “own” money, as such.

It all depends on the financial set up between the two of them.

YANBU. It’s soul destroying to go out to work and have so little to show for it. I feel completely conned by Capitalism and consumerism sometimes and often day dream of packing it all in and moving somewhere beautiful to live more simply .

Yes I was left with -£500 when I went back as a single mum with no support - I didn’t buy any new clothes for 2 years!!!

These sort of posts really hack me off.

OP did you not do any number-crunching and cost out how much it would cost to have a child?

www.moneyhelper.org.uk/en/family-and-care/becoming-a-parent/baby-costs-calculator

This doesn't include loss of earnings from one partner.

So now you think the taxpayer should fund you? Nice.

You've covered all your bills and have money left over. That's a win, surely?

I understand that, but if he paid for the bills instead then they’d be £x hundred worse off as a family. He’d have to pay for the full food, rent, electricity, phone, netflix and presumably give her spending money so they’d be far worse off if she didn’t work.

Well it's worth it if you have money left over and your own 'allowance' each month.

OP not come back so lots of posters speculating on her DHs contribution but let’s lay it out - regardless - many people dream of £300 a month spare. OP needs to come back and explain or just own up to being a GF.

I laugh when people call it a cost of living crisis. There is no living about it. It's a cost of existing crisis.

I think you need to look at the longer term picture.

Yes, I remember the years when my wage was essentially just paying for childcare, it really did piss me off and I often thought 'What's the point? I should just look after my DC'

The payoff is later down the line - in terms of your career options and hopefully wage trajectory. Keep your hand in now, accept you won't have a lot of spending money but as they leave nursery this will obviously give you more money.

My friends who have put their careers on hold for young children and were SAHPs for several years have found it difficult to get back into the same wage bracket on their return to work - this is equally frustrating to them, highly qualified and capable women who aren't being paid their worth

I don’t know why people are shitting all over your post, the number of ‘I’ve never had close to £300 left after bills!’ is depressing and people are using it to shut you up.
I don’t know why you would voluntarily want a race to the bottom.
The uk is a low wage country, we like to think we aren’t but we are. And the rising interest rates, inflation and energy bills has made that more apparent.
To me £100 disposable income and £200 savings from full time work is not a lot. Granted this assumes you aren’t blowing loads on food etc which is making your bills artificially high.
The cost of childcare is very grim and again one of the highest across the world so compared to UK wages you aren’t left with much.

Is this a wind up ? A lot of people have £0 left over let alone £200 to save.

Back in the 90s I had a senior colleague who cleared his overdraft on payday and by 1st of month was eating back into the overdraft. His spouse looked after very young children at time so didn't work. They had sold his beloved motorbike to pay bills by then. His household operated like that for a few years. He was amiable & ambitious is how he coped, and kept pursuing work opportunities to get pay rises.

Right now I have a young male colleague who is fuming because all promotions at work have been stopped: well, you can be promoted, but you won't get higher salary with the new job title. I think colleague is relying on the promotions to pay for their mortgage set up & keep their house improvement debts manageable, so it is frustrating for them.

I appreciate what you're saying OP, ie you're working long hours and don't feel you've got much to show for it. Having said that, being able to pay your bills and have some money for yourself is a positive thing at this time.

Someone posted, "£100 really isn’t much". Admittedly we have £120pm each, but that covers going out, clothes, treats, presents for eachother - we actually manage ok on that, but I guess it depends what level of spending you're used to.

100% agree, if you can’t remotely relate move to another thread.
OP long and short of it is to stay in work and get a better paying job or another source of income. Ignore the mean comments.

Hang in there, it’s 2 years of full time nursery bills if your baby is 1 year old. Once they reach the 30 free hours it’s gets much better. Your also contributing to your old age pension etc.

The OP doesn’t have much money and is clearly unhappy.

I would obviously feel worse for someone who is completely destitute, but people are acting like the OP is minted when she is nowhere near it!

Why is everyone trying to win gold in the poverty olympics on here?

I think sadly lots of us are in the same boat. £200 sounds like a decent amount of money but this month we’ve had a wedding, a leaving party present to buy, a friend’s birthday present plus night out with dinner and drinks. £200 would be gone before you got to the end of that list. I think what OP is saying here is what so many people are saying just now. The whole point of working isn’t just to pay your bills, to survive and work more. It’s supposed to allow you to afford a nice holiday, a dinner out, weekends away, new clothes etc. When you have kids and with the season changing too you end up having to constantly buy new clothes. It’s quite a sad state of affairs 😔 Our outgoing three big bills (mortgage, electricity and council tax) is £1100 now, it’s just insane.

I think perhaps we’re talking at cross purposes.

They would, yes. Of course they would (by an amount which equates to her salary-childcare costs). But she might not be. That’s what I mean. I wasn’t saying I think she earns £300.

I’m was just trying to understand whether this is a general “life (with a child) costs more than I thought/ too much” issue, or whether there’s something in the marital finances at play.

I wasn’t the first to ask about her DH’s expendable incime.

I’ve obviously not communicated it well! My punishment will be to spend the next 2 hours at a 5 year old’s party. Sigh.

😊

Was thinking the exact same, £200 is nothing when there are things every month that need paid for with that money so it would most likely end up that you were in your overdraft til pay day again