To wonder why some people don't work full-time?

[donniedarko89]

I was part-time myself while DD was very young as I wanted to spend time with her. I know many mums however who have stayed part time even after the kids go to school. They only work 2 or 3 days a week. The thing is, they're not loaded, on the contrary they keep complaining that finances are tight and they can't afford stuff - then why not increase your work days (they could all easily do it)? Some of them even have a cleaner. No hobbies on the side either. It genuinely puzzles me!

TBH it’s because when I did the sums and factored in childcare etc it the benefits of being part time far outweighed the benefit of the small increase in income

It’s choice I guess x I’ve worked part-time until my my youngest finished his first year at secondary school. My well paid salary allowed me to do so…. But there has been no reason to stay part time now that he’s settled and his siblings are older. But it would have never been an option if I wasn’t well paid x I couldn’t have afforded too.

Maybe they have eldery relatices to care for, maybe they want to pick up their kids from schiok, want to exercise, want to volunteer, have mental health issues, have partners who do nothing around the house. All kinds of reasosn. I don't intend to ever work full time again if we can afford it, even after our DC are at school full time. I have got where I want to be in my career and I just want to be able

Sorry so many typos. My phone keeps posting before I have finished! I just meant I can see why they don't work full time. Although I will increase my hours if we need the money

So says someone who obviously enjoys their job. For some of us it’s a means to an end and if I could retire tomorrow, I wouldn’t think twice

I imagine it's because for people who don't earn huge amounts they wouldn't actually make any extra money after they'd paid tax on their earnings and paid for extortionate childcare. I work in a senior professional role and earn a decent wage (maybe not in Mumsnet terms but in real life 😉) but I wouldn't have much extra money by going full time from my 24 hours a week as I would have a lot of childcare to pay (plus I have no idea how they would get to a place for childcare as there is no after school provision, nor is there any childcare setting near their school, which is in the middle of nowhere!).

I was part-time myself while DD was very young as I wanted to spend time with her. I know many mums however who have stayed part time even after the kids go to school. They only work 2 or 3 days a week. The thing is, they're not loaded, on the contrary they keep complaining that finances are tight and they can't afford stuff - then why not increase your work days (they could all easily do it)? Some of them even have a cleaner. No hobbies on the side either. It genuinely puzzles me!

Why, unless she has to, would a woman want to work a job full-time? I can see doing it if you have your own company or a passion, but why would any mother want to scurry off to work every day, spend the entire day there, rush home at night, and then drop their kids off at after-school activities?

In my experience, the only individuals who put in that kind of effort have pretty terrible partners who adopt a 50/50 mentality.

I would personally choose less money over going off to a job 5 days a week that I didn't have much pleasure doing.

In an ideal scenario it's amazing when mums can do something of their own, friends of mine are social media managers, VA’s, sell stuff online and it just seems like the perfect balance.

Work life balance …quality of life…enjoying life ! And people who work full time moan about finances too .

Exactly. I have never had a job which gave me a lunch break of longer than 30 minutes. If I had a whole hour, I could easily go for a 30 minute walk, or a run before eating. But if I ran, I'd have to get changed first, then shower after and get changed again. Which would mean I'd need a workplace with showers. I just don't see how it's logistically possible to leave your workplace, go to the gym, workout, shower, get back to your workplace and eat lunch, even if you had an hour. Especially if you're driving, what if you get caught in traffic?

A job with flexible working times, decent breaks and easily accessible facilities like showers or a nearby gym, sounds much easier to have a work life balance with, even if you are working fulltime. We don't even have a microwave at mine atm 🤣

Topgub - I did not say he 'wasn't suited to childcare' full stop. I said he was not suited to being a SAHD for years on end!

Exactly this.

So many reasons....

If you have no outside help you might have an admin day, you might have an illness that does not suit full time work but is not visible (ms) etc.

You might be a carer
You might have a feckless husband who does sweet f all around the house
You might have a hobby
You might value headspace before cash

I have no intention of working full time atm as financially its not worth it when the kids are little and a fair few of the above and if they miss out on riding and tennis lessons then I'll live with it...

@FreshCop

why would any dad want to scurry off to work every day, spend the entire day there?

Jeeze

You think women should be limited to a side hustle?

No women capable of anything more than that?

If someone is financially stable enough working part-time and it suits the family dynamic with no resentment from partner etc then fine, but I don't always buy the "work-life" balance thing.

I work full-time hours over 3 days, and I'll stay in the same line of work when I have children so I can earn a full-time salary and still have a good balance. I have 4 full days to enjoy!

I know many part-time workers who work things out well, and equally I know a few who constantly complain about money, have the ability to work more hours, but chose not to because they simply enjoy doing nothing. I'm not sure I agree with it, but their choice I guess.

I couldn't imagine having a "job" per se because I wouldn't have time to do my chores, shop, handle admin bits, cook, or maintain order in the house.

Why would I do all of that in the evenings?

After school we have dinner, a bath, a story, and then the kids go to bed nice and early every night.

Usually, after 7 o'clock, I can unwind and watch Netflix, etc. I'm satisfied with that.

I'm never stressed out or feel mentally drained like I did when I had a job.

@ambermorning

Bit of a backtrack.

Is he doing 50% of all direct childcare? Carrying 50% of the mental load? Doing 50% of the housework?

I am one of those. Not rich but OK with money and will complain occasionally about being short of money as everyone else. Changed my hours to accommodate kids school time and stayed the same even thought their are teens now. I like being at home for them and the 7.5 hours in the office feels too long. Unfortunately will have to start a new job soon doing full time hours but if possible will reduce hours again.

I work 28 hours a week. We live rurally and wrap around care isn't great so I can sort the school runs with this arrangement. Also help to keep on top of domestic stuff. We can afford it so that's what I do. Might go back full time when they're in high school but I may well not!

Previously it was the norm to work 7 days a week...

People who are mid life may be more likely to have chronic ill health

I have a friend who started a laser hair removal business too during maternity leave, shes doing fab and works around her child too.

Honestly ladies, life is too short for these shit jobs. Especially with young kids.

Going to the gym at lunch. Wow. I’m a teacher. I get 35 minutes for my lunch as I have to do a 35 minute lunch duty. In my previous school I would have 1 hour for lunch and no duty but I’d often be tidying up and prepping the afternoon whilst eating. And you couldn’t get from my school to the gym and back in a lunch hour never mind doing the actual work out.

As previous posters have said, some jobs are more flexible than others. Teaching is not flexible and requires additional work on evenings, weekends and holidays (which are not paid). I did have another job out of teaching for a few years which was more project management and I could work full time and not really be as stressed. I could arrive whatever time I wanted to, work from home if I needed to, often travelled about and any additional hours (overnight in particular) were take as time off in lieu. It was a much lower paid job that teaching though. I started that job before having children though but did work condensed days once I had my eldest. I was able to keep my hours and work longer days so I could have a day off in the week. At the time my DH worked shifts and we were able to use grandparents for childcare. Once the grandparents were no longer able to do the childcare and the DH became an ex DH and I ended up back in teaching I decided part time was the way forward.

Honestly get high earning husband with drive and ambition. Then have children

When my 2nd was born I dropped my hours from 40 hours to 38 and the difference in my salary and pension was huge. We couldnt afford for me to drop anymore. I went back to 40 hours. As time goes on I still wish I could afford to drop down but I'll never be able to. I just tell myself itll be worth it in 15 years time when I retire, still young ish. Its bloody hard though and I've never managed to so anything 100%

Because I don't want to spend my evenings and weekends doing all the domestic admin. I want my weekends and evenings to be quality time with my kids, not just spend that time yelling at them to leave me alone so I can clean/do laundry (like my ft working neighbour does) By working 3-4 days a week I am able to get the domestic crap done whilst the kids are at school, that way our weekends are spent as a family.

Why do you chase more and more money, working full time whilst your kids are in after school club? Hardly parenting is it? I am making sure I spend time with my children, even as teenagers, interacting with them, supporting them, giving them the things that money can't buy.

I don't even have kids and I work part time. Yes, money is tight but I figured I would rather have more time to myself while I am young(ish) as life is short. I was exhausted when I used to work full time and never felt like I had time to do the things I want. Now I do.

Maybe one day I will work full time again but for now I enjoy it.