I suppose an interesting question, is whether those who work part time (mostly women but not all) would choose to work full time, if their OH did much more of the childcare and domestic stuff.
A reasonable question is whether the part timers (often women) do it becaue otherwise they work full time and then do all the domestic stuff and childcare too….and it’s the total that is too much. By being part-time, the overall workload of earning money and other stuff is somehow evened out.
In purely financial terms, if all jobs could be done part time and promotions available equally to full and part timers, it probably works better for 2 adults to do 4 days a week each and totally split the childcare and other domestic jobs. There would be less tax and more flexibility. However, this isn’t the way things work out. It’s still the case that most decent promotions are more available to full timers. In order to have a full timer, many families decide the only way to manage and facilitate that is for the other person to be part time. On one level that’s seen as a financial disaster for the part timer. People talk if sacrificed career progression, pension smaller, risks of poverty if divorce happens. I think these all apply much more if someone totally gives up work and significantly less so to someone who works part time. It’s true that these downsides exist and it could be said that women are forced into them by the need to facilitate a full timer and also the fact that even if they were full time the domestic workload would in reality fall on them. Perhaps if that domestic workload wouldn’t all fall to them, or mostly fall to them, more women would work full time and choose to. But I wonder. I think that even when some factor in oension loss, career stalling etc etc, many women (and men) would still choose to be part time, and it is a valid choice. Some people highly value that time with small children, time at home and even like domestic stuff when there’s time to do it and willingly and knowingly sacrifice money and career progression and pension for it. It’s often a thought out out choice.
What about men? Is it a thought out choice ir even a real choice ? Mostly I think it is. Perhaps these days opportunities have opened up to women meaning there are several options - full time work, part time work plus childcare/domestic , full time at home. All are socially acceptable and normal today. We all know people who do all of them. We probably know less men who do each of these. So maybe for men to choose to be part time or full time at home involves more of a move against societal norms than for women. It doesn’t mean it can’t happen. Lots of men would consider part time and being stay at home, but actually just prefer to be at work and aren’t drawn to the childcare and domestic stuff. Perhaps they don’t feel the need to work part time if when they get home from full time, they don’t do an equal share of domestic stuff anyway, even if their spouse always works full time. They will be some who are resentful of working full time and would like to do something different, but old values tell them that as a man they must work full time and provide….so they do, but resent it. It’s a shame when anyone resents what they are doing.
Again, there’s no right solution, only people talking through the options and what is possible financially and what people would like to do….and being honest and open to aall the various permutations available. Perhaps people don’t investigate and look into all the options and so choose from a more limited range than possible.
Most women in here who are part time seem happy with it. It could be that they are all subject to the constructs of society and are in a weak position financially because of the way society is structured and the fact most domestic work and childcare falls in women, making being part time in paid work feel necessary to get any balance in life. That could all be true…and at the same time, women might be happy with the status quo, as most people through history actually are…living with what they know and oblivious to the forces that hold them where they are.
All I can say is our family are happy with our set up. We have talked about it and what we have works for us. Maybe we’ve been driven into it by norms and values dating back centuries, but we are happy with how we are living and our mix of work/domestic.