To wonder why some people don't work full-time?

[donniedarko89]

I was part-time myself while DD was very young as I wanted to spend time with her. I know many mums however who have stayed part time even after the kids go to school. They only work 2 or 3 days a week. The thing is, they're not loaded, on the contrary they keep complaining that finances are tight and they can't afford stuff - then why not increase your work days (they could all easily do it)? Some of them even have a cleaner. No hobbies on the side either. It genuinely puzzles me!

I think you'll find the OP started it - so if you or she can't take the heat, stay out of the kitchen.

It's one of the most provocative posts I've ever seen on here.

And we wonder why there is a gender pay-gap!

Exactly this.

And why there are fewer women than men in senior roles. And why women have, on average, poorer pension provision. And why women generally come off worse financially in divorces, having dimished earning power in comparison to their ex husbands.

I know why I work full time. I could afford not to, but I do. It’s because I’ve got a great, well-paid job that I enjoy. I like to be intellectually stretched. I like the challenge of complex projects. I enjoy the company of my colleagues, many of whom are people I wouldn’t encounter in my non-work life. My industry interests me. I am happily married to another high earner, but I like to be financially self-sufficient so that I can do what I like, buy what I like and save for a comfortable retirement. Nor do I want to effectively check out of senior leadership by going part time.

I realise that this will come as a disappointment to the posters who claim that people who work full time have no life and can’t see that there is more to life than work and neglect their children and social lives etc etc. Clearly I can’t speak for those posters, but anyone I encounter in real life who says things like that is usually an underachiever who resents people in good careers and seeks to make themselves feel better.

I suppose it looks like I work part time because I work three days a week, I work three very long days to give me full time hours over fewer days.
I would never go back to working five days a week.

OP, are you happy with your own working pattern and your own family life? If so, I wouldn't worry about what other people are doing.

I enjoy my full-time NHS role and have a fabulous relationship with my older teen kids. They find it a little odd when mothers of school-age kids sit at home not working at all

As for this... @FlamencoDance, why are your older teens even thinking about what the mothers of school-aged children get up to? I don't think my DC (now 18+) have ever given a second's thought to what other mothers do. In the very unlikely instance of my DC saying that SAHMs "sit at home", I'd tell them not to make assumptions about other people's lives.

@ChangeOver22

Really?!

C'mon!

The op isn't anywhere near as judgemental as your post

Asking why people who claim to be short if money don't work full time isn't anything like asking why people don't care about their children enough

Money was very tight for us, but if I'd worked all my wages would have gone on childcare, so we made the decision that I stay at home with our children.

Have I regretted it? Yes ad no -I loved the time with them, but would have been much further ahead in my career if I'd continued to work.

@FlamencoDance define 'unequal'. Dh earns twice what I do even if I was working full time and I'm not exactly on minimum wage.

So should I not have married him because he earns more?

As for sitting at home. Why are part time workers always 'sitting at home'. As though they all drop the kids off and go and plonk themselves on the sofa for the day in front of the tv.

😂😂😂

T

Never had to use childcare. The difference in wage isn't that much after tax.

@sugasuga

The thread is full of women saying exactly that

Not so funny huh

Did you type and then delete before posting “The ideal parents”?

It’s excellent that there are teenagers out there who find gender disparity like this odd. They are the future.

If you seriously can't figure out why these Mum's may not want to work full time then maybe you need to think harder.
Also it's noone else's business. Leave them to it and concentrate on you and your life, don't let it bother you.

It made a big difference to us as kids that mum was part time.

Because 13 weeks of the year the children are not at school you don't get 13 weeks holiday is one reason. Another reason is that everyone's family is different and have different priorities.

Er, because her children are curious about the world? What’s odd about that? Teenagers are going to ask questions and form views on what they see around them. Good luck preventing that!

My kids are grown up. I work part time. Because I want too.

Because I would rather spend more tine with my children than more time at work. It is as simple as that.

The older children get the more they need you, up to about age 14

Because he is terrible at life admin 🤣

Seriously though, his salary was higher than mine when I went on mat leave. I changed jobs last year and my FTE salary is closer to what my husband earns now, and obviously my part time salary is far lower than his full time salary. For now me doing part time hours works well for us and long term, if I did go full time, I have potential to earn more than he does (I’ve accidentally moved to a weird niche role that seems to be very in demand and can be done fully remotely judging by all the recruitment consultants who contact me on linked in!).

I’ve never really thought about it? I assume people and families work out what suits them. School holidAys, finances, hours don’t suit, don’t like relying on others to do lots of childcare… I mean I’m guessing. I just don’t find this constant comparing and competing a very healthy past time.