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Original poster

To wonder why some people don't work full-time?

1000 replies

donniedarko89 · 13/10/2022 17:16

I was part-time myself while DD was very young as I wanted to spend time with her. I know many mums however who have stayed part time even after the kids go to school. They only work 2 or 3 days a week. The thing is, they're not loaded, on the contrary they keep complaining that finances are tight and they can't afford stuff - then why not increase your work days (they could all easily do it)? Some of them even have a cleaner. No hobbies on the side either. It genuinely puzzles me!

OP posts:
Iamthewombat · 13/10/2022 20:17

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted as it refers to a deleted post.

Original poster
donniedarko89 · 13/10/2022 20:18

Oh Lordy! I didn't intend for this to turn into a FT Vs PT debate (which it's what seems to be happening). I was just curious about the motivations of a very specific subset of mums who are constantly complaining about finances, do little housework, and work few hours. That's all!

OP posts:
dizzydizzydizzy · 13/10/2022 20:18

I would love to work FT. I have chronic fatigue syndrome and struggle to do 2 days.

Topgub · 13/10/2022 20:19

@Irridescantshimmmer

I can see my children

They're not invisible because I work a few more hours than someone working part time

secular39 · 13/10/2022 20:20

I work part time. My job is very demanding- to the point when I am using some of my days off to conduct further research due to the job role I am in. I love it but it can consume you. I fear that if I work full time, it would become a 24 hour role which would
Leave me very little time to be with my children, who are all in their teens anyway.

Oh, plus; all of my children have additional needs- my days off are my respite.

Original poster
donniedarko89 · 13/10/2022 20:21

SimonaRazowska · 13/10/2022 20:04

So OP, how do you and your partner manage holidays, child sick days, inset days, school events? Just curious as to us this would have been impossible if we both worked full time

We have very little family help actually. I managed to get a flex job that allows me more freedom. DH does the same

OP posts:
Thegreymethod · 13/10/2022 20:22

RJnomore1 · 13/10/2022 19:36

Can I ask a genuine question of all the pet timers on here (almost all at least)
Why is it you who is part time to facilitate family life and not your husband/partner?

Oh come on, do you seriously not know the answer to that? You couldn't take a wild guess?
I'd suspect, I'd suspect it's mostly for financial reasons, my husband earns more than me so he works full time.

TowerRaven7 · 13/10/2022 20:23

You really don’t know what their financial situation is. I work 3 days a week and I’ve mentioned to people how some things are expensive because being living under our means results in me being able to work part time. No matter how much money you make, if you don’t manage it well you’re not going to have any.

stayathomer · 13/10/2022 20:25

I was just curious about the motivations of a very specific subset of mums who are constantly complaining about finances, do little housework, and work few hours. That's all!
The do little housework thing- we were once (when we were a few years younger’ standing around and a mother asked about cleaners. A few mums started half giggling and the lady said with her back she couldn’t stoop or put a lot of muscle into cleaning and so things were getting out of control. Turns out she’d also had bad heart issues but she didn’t tell us. At my fittest I’ve still been a horrendous cleaner. I never got a cleaner myself but I don’t think it’s lazy to get one if you’re working pt or ft or even not at all. And while someone poor couldn’t stretch to one, if a lot of people gave up some entertainment costs they could spring to a cleaner so I don’t get why people are so bitter about people who get someone in to help!!

PanPacificBallroomChampion · 13/10/2022 20:26

It genuinely puzzles me!

I’m genuinely puzzled by parents that can afford to cut their hours but choose to work full time.

FlamencoDance · 13/10/2022 20:28

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster’s request.

PanPacificBallroomChampion · 13/10/2022 20:32

Meant to say we both work PT - winding down to retirement hopefully at 55 in 4 years time.

diffandproud · 13/10/2022 20:32

Ahh maybe because they don't want to 🤣🤣 how does this puzzle you, there's more to life than work.I work two days a week and all my kids are nearly finished with education and guess what I absolutely will
Not be going full time. I will have five days off a week to do as i please and I can't wait.I might even reduce to one day a week,I enjoy my life, to be honest it kind of sounds like you don't have much enjoyment in your life .

SoupDragon · 13/10/2022 20:33

I was just curious about the motivations of a very specific subset of mums who are constantly complaining about finances, do little housework, and work few hours. That's all!

That's not a "very specific subset of mums" it's just a few people you know.

oneuptwodown · 13/10/2022 20:34

Depending on their men to bring the money in while they run the home 🤢

Bloody hell. You think making money is so much more important or amazing that doing all the other stuff that needs doing in life makes you nauseous??

What must you think of those on social security benefits, I wonder.

Are you Jacob Rees-Mogg?

Actually no. His misogyny isn’t internalized.

This isn’t as feminist or woman-forward viewpoint I think that you think it is. A partnership between two people who look at that totality of what required for their family’s wellbeing, dividing up tasks according to wants and needs and living happily with the outcome isn’t 🤢. I can’t think why you might think it is.

thelobsterquadrille · 13/10/2022 20:35

This reply has been deleted

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster’s request.

So many assumptions here Hmm

Equal doesn't mean everyone does an exact even split of every single task.
Working part-time doesn't mean you depend on a full-time worker to support you. Lots of people earn plenty of money on part-time hours.
Working part-time doesn't mean you spend the rest of your time 'running the home'.
Lots of dads/men also work part-time.

Shock horror - DH and I both work part-time and we don't even have children Wink

oneuptwodown · 13/10/2022 20:36

They find it a little odd when mothers of school-age kids sit at home not working at all.

They might benefit from broadening their horizons as they grow older. There’s so much more to life than paid employment 🤷‍♀️

ambermorning · 13/10/2022 20:37

Well if you're "genuinely puzzled" about women who work part-time OP, your brain would probably explode at the thought of someone like me who doesn't work at all. I don't moan about money though. If money was an issue, I would work.

If you are not wanting to kick off a PT / FT debate. - or you only wanted to talk about a "very specific subset of women" - than why not ask that "very specific subset of women" in real life? Nobody in here knows your friends from the Basil Brush.

ChangeOver22 · 13/10/2022 20:38

Feel sorry for your kid in wrap-around care and out every week of the holidays in clubs presumably... but I don't judge you so don't judge me if I don't outsource my kids' upbringing to other people. Perhaps these people working part-time like spending time with their kids more than the extra money and that's what they're moaning about, if you dig a little deeper...

VestaTilley · 13/10/2022 20:39

Maybe they prioritise other things, maybe they do a lot at home, maybe they dislike their jobs, maybe they can’t get more hours, maybe they have health problems.

Maybe it’s none of your business.

Topgub · 13/10/2022 20:40

@ChangeOver22

No.

Your post isn't absolutely dripping in judgement at all!

Not even a hint

FlamencoDance · 13/10/2022 20:40

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster’s request.

SoupDragon · 13/10/2022 20:40

They find it a little odd when mothers of school-age kids sit at home not working at all

why do they think they "sit at home"? Do they lack the ability to visualise alternative ways of living and think everyone not "working" is "sitting at home"?

ambermorning · 13/10/2022 20:43

"Do they lack the ability to visualise alternative ways of living...?"

Well it would seem so on MN.

Notplayingball · 13/10/2022 20:44

,"plus; all of my children have additional needs- my days off are my respite."

This is why I don't work at all - the days the DC are in school are my respite days.

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