Topgub, yes my OH works part time.
At various points we’ve both worked full time, one of part time and now both part time.
We’ve done what we could afford and what worked best for different stages of life. Same will be case with retirement. We don’t have any sense we both have to do exactly the same and neither feels that if one is working and other isn’t, that the situation is unfair. We’re a unit and the finances and effort are for both of us and the whole family.
Fortunately, neither of us has been exploited by the other, taken advantage of and we don’t have any particular gender stereo-types that say one must work and other not etc. So we don’t have ‘baggage’ that stops us doing what works at the time for us. Sometimes we’ve had limited financial flexibility and both worked full time. Other times there has been more and we have decided based on the jobs and also needs of childcare, journeys to work, pay….and the stuff that feeds into the equation. I’d have thought most people feed all those things into their thought process or equation to decide what’s possible and works best.
The only time I see a problem is when one person doesn’t like the arrangement or feels pressured into something they don’t want. If youre thinking of what might be the more typical gender roles, some women feel they can’t work full time and want to, and some men feel burdened by working full time and being main or sole breadwinner. Those aren’t good. But equally, those with the typical part timer being the woman, often find it works well for both parties. When it’s reversed, it can work well too.
Most approaches don’t have to last forever and the needs of families change. The positive if part time over stopping work altogether is you still have a job and possibly a career depending on what you do. You can choose one pattern for your family and often it can be changed a couple of years later, if one or both don’t like it or as needs of the family change.