If you were ever frumpy, how did you revamp yourself?

[EbbyEbs]

I’m not one for nails and heels etc but I do want to look my age rather than looking 10 years older than I am.

What were your “game changers”?

vitamins? Skin care? Hair care … what product or habit changed how you look and feel for the better?

Am currently exiting a mid-30s frumpy stage. Here's what I've done:

• Get teeth deep cleaned by the dental hygienist to remove stains
• Gone on Depop to buy some key items (coat, handbag, everyday leather jacket) from brands that are more expensive than what I could have afforded/justified buying new. I found some great, barely-worn bargains.

-Invested in some good quality basics. It's amazing what a difference just buying a really good white t shirt and a really good black t shirt can do for your wardrobe! White Company is really good for this.

• new glasses. Igot the shop assistants in Specsavers to suggest frames for me. My previous frames were really aging me and made me look awful
• a few pairs of simple, discrete stud earrings and gold hoop earrings

-binning clothes that don't fit or giving them to charity -absolutely NO fleeces!

• this is slightly embarrassing but look up the YouTube channel of a lady called Anna Bey. She has some really good style tips for looking "expensive" on a budget. I will warn you that the focus of her YouTube channel is basically advising women how to bag a rich man and live a jet set life, which completely goes against my feminist principles and is totally gross BUT her style tips are absolutely top drawer

Losing weight and toning up

What would you replace it with? A tinted moisturiser?

Chanel CC cream is a thick tinted moisturiser with SPF 50.

everyone keeps using the word “current” re fashion but I think following the latest fashion is not the best thing - timeless, simple and classic is the best thing. Everyone looks good in well fitting jeans and a good quality white t shirt. Everyone looks good in a well fitting shirt dress etc.

shoes don’t need to be heels to be smart.

Also every 6-12 months using crest teeth whitening strips for 10 days

Absolutely. I'm self-employed, working only with women, so apart from the school run I don't have much reason to glam up. And I'd rather have an extra half an hour in bed.

The yummy mummies annoy me tbh because they're so obviously judging the slummy mummies (I. E me)

Can I ask - what do you do at the gym? And do you find 3 times a week is enough? I've signed up but can only manage 2 or 3 times a week max, not sure how much benefit I'll get from that.

The yummy mummies annoy me tbh because they're so obviously judging the slummy mummies (I. E me)

what a load of bollocks. If you don’t want to make an effort that’s your business - don’t project crap on to people who do want to. No one cares what you wear.

I'm 36, but feeling so frumpy since having my now 4 and 2 yo, also wfh pt since the pandemic. I look forward to putting these tips inn practice...one day!

My frumpiness is due to sheer laziness. I have awful dry frizzy hair worse in pregnancy and i need to straighten it daily but i cant be arsed . Hoping this thread gives me the kick up the arse i need.

Nobody is judging you.
Get over yourself.

Went back to the gym. Once your back, glutes and thigh muscles are strong, they pull you upright so you automatically look and move as though you're younger.

Got more daylight - which meant more vitamin D (plus supplementing). Gets rid of osteomalacia, so you walk better - no waddling. Helped by orthotics in my footwear, so I don't have an uneven gait and knock on pain - which meant I increased my incidental activity levels as well.

The development of pectoral muscles meant my bust lifted, so no boob-stomach combination (or lots of loose skin to try to get into a cup).

Regular gym visits meant extra regular hair washing, so I added L'Oreal Magic Water and cheap ass Dove conditioner to the psoriasis shampoo - glossy, shiny hair that has been known to swish.

I get my eyebrows done and use a face self tan to get rid of the stark difference between pale skin and blue circles under my eyes.

Because I'm putting all that effort into exercise, I don't really want to undo all of it with eating crap, so I improved my diet and added a couple of exercise-oriented supplements + a multivitamin.

It's been a brilliant way to handle stress - no matter how tough the day has been, I can put my earbuds in, listen to music and just lose myself in what I'm doing for an hour.

Oh, and I bought some dresses for work. Didn't have a choice, really, as the gym and eating healthier meant my old stuff (that never really fitted anyway) wouldn't stay up, but a frock meant I'd get more mileage before having to go down another size. Clothes that fit and flatter (I only buy the colours and styles that suit me, rather than just what would go on and was in the shop) mean you're more comfortable - which shows in the way you move and your attitude.

I actually have seen messages where they've been judging me and my friends but thanks for your input.

See my message to the other Instaclone.

Ah I see - you had a bad experience so now you’re tarring everyone who makes effort into their appearance on the school run with the same brush?

i don’t see it as “being glam”
btw. I see if as implementing a few changes which mean I have to make minimal effort to look my best. That’s what most of this thread is about.

Just realised you referred to us as “instaclones” = if you’re as delightful in person I’m not surprised people are bitching about you 😆

Rowing - 2000m warm up. Intensity varies.

Machines - varies depending upon what needs a bit of help - always do something for legs, whether quads, glutes and hamstrings or glutes, adductors, abductors, abs, then one plane of upper body movement - back and chest/back or shoulders/back and arms, sometimes more pushing than pulling, sometimes the reverse. The weight varies - sometimes it's lighter and more reps, sometimes heavier and fewer, sometimes heavier and faster to add more cardio element to it.

Warm down - having a nice sit down and stretch, followed by walking home 1 mile.

Takes about 1h20m by the time I'm opening the front door.

Then at the weekend, might do a longer gym session or go out for a plod round the rec for more daylight and fresh air.

Oh and the benefit you'll get from 2-3 times a week is 2-300% more than you'll get from thinking it's not worth the hassle and staying on the sofa.

I'm currently a work in progress.

For me, it's been losing some weight during lockdown, leading to an increase in confidence. And I reckon it's confidence that is the key for me. I now have more confidence to wear clothes I would never have bought even a couple of years ago.

I still need to lose more weight, but I am getting fitter by the large increase in walking and other exercise. I'm using the NHS weight loss app to help with eating in a healthier way. I'm not really calorie counting, but by choosing healthier food, the calories have naturally reduced.

Oh I think current is important and applies to classic.

My black, narrow ankle grazers of the last few years don't feel current; neither does the navy dress with white dots that I wore yesterday - it is just a little too short - I doukd get away with it with navy opaques but haven't got them out when it's still warmer than 16. The sheer tights I've been wearing with longer lengths have felt great but not with that frock.

I have just been through my summer and winter stuff which I do in autumn and spring. Two long line jewel cardigans have gone in the oxfam bag; they are dated but also tired. An Austin Reed Black suit that was perfect in 2006 has had a reprieve; it is beautiful and the trousers are back on trend; the jacket may be in a year or two.

My pearls haven't been worn for a year or two - whilst classic they don't feel current - neither do my classic Hermes silk scarves from City days but they will be kept.

Classic jeans and white shirts do change in cut and style. Perfect ones can be kept, tired ones can't. At the back of the cupboard I've a beautiful low heeled pair of leather and suede slightly slouchy boots that can be worn at mid calf with the tops folded over or full length. I bought them in 1986 and they may come back but they aren't right for now.

Just to add, looking back to my 20s I think I was quite staid and far too classic for my age. I sort of grew into myself in my 40s. In my 60s I am at ease.

One tip about not ending up frumpy. Treat your feet well in your 20s and 30s (I never wore heels except for special occasions) and wore comfortable shoes (comfort doesn't have to be trendy and trendy should never pinch or rub). There is nothing more frumpy than misshapen feet and toes however trendy the shoe or sandal.

I lost a HUGE amount of weight and completely changed what I wore.
Short denim skirts, clingy ribbed dresses, close-fitting everything. My DC’s hoodies/zippers 😂
I’ve been wearing pillar box red lipstick 💄 for the last 4 years. It’s kinda my trademark now!
I look way better at 54 than I did at 24.

@NotAHouse Honestly, the yummy mummies are too busy focusing on themselves and if they notice someone it will be noticing the other yummy mummies. People tend to compare up not down.

Wrong thread, sorry!