Page 5 | To have banged on her car?

Lauren1983 · 2022-10-07T19:08:59+00:00

There is a car that I see daily on the school run that parks illegally and selfishly (on double yellows, on a corner, blocking a dropped kerb and half on the pavement. I have considered leaving a note or speaking to the woman who does it but decided they are so selfish and entitled it would make no difference. Today they had parked the same so I was a bit pissed off with them but just went to get my child from school. On our way home this car came down the road we were waiting to cross and I noticed the woman was holding her mobile phone in one hand and driving with the other. I saw red and started shouting at her to put down her phone. She just looked straight ahead so I went around the back of her car and banged on the boot twice. I then came around and again shouted at her to put the phone down. She again ignored me and drove off. Wibu to bang her car? I didn't want to cause any damage (I'm pretty certain I didn't) but I did want to shock her. She had her kids in the car so now thinking I might have gone too far. To be clear she wasn't talking on the phone or texting but just kind of scrolling.

OneFrenchEgg · 08/10/2022 09:34

I have a BB. It’s very stressful finding parking when you’re collecting a child and can’t walk far… or at all. When dd was in primary, the school let m pick up and collect on their premises until they reconfigured from about year 5.

But as I said my dc has one and we use the school car park. There's also a public car park at the end of the road that (if this is carer with BB) they could wait in. No need whatsoever to park in double yellows - the road is a nightmare with buses one side and double yellows the other.

cushioncovers · 08/10/2022 10:30

Don't apologise to her op. She's parking and driving dangerously. Next time film her and send it to the school and police.

Original poster

Lauren1983 · 08/10/2022 11:05

In hindsight I should have got my phone out but I probably had 10 seconds to react and my phone was in my handbag. She only stopped due to cars being on the road she wanted to join so I had very little time to react. I hit (or strongly tapped) her car just to get her attention enough to put the phone down as raising my voice didn't work.

To everyone saying I screamed at her, at no point did I say I screamed. I raised my voice but did not scream or swear at her.

With regards to damage I would be very surprised. I'm not a bodybuilder with huge strength and I hit the car with my hand not an object. If she comes up to me and wants damages I'll be happy for her to report me to the police as I have pictures of her illegal parking and it would be my word versus hers plus there is a chance she didn't hear it as she was playing music quite loud. I'm pretty sure she would have noticed me shouting at her but there is a slight chance she didn't as she just ignored me.

Again in hindsight there was a chance she could have got out and hit me but I took my chances as I thought the chances of her hitting someone with the car was higher. As I've said I have evidence of her ignoring driving laws regularly so I strongly feel that she probably does this a lot. She probably still will but if there is a chance that she won't do it anymore (mobile use not the parking) then maybe I've saved a life.

I think in future I'll try to get a picture and if I can't I'll just leave them to it.

OP posts:

Shiningstarr · 08/10/2022 11:28

Lauren1983 · 08/10/2022 11:05

In hindsight I should have got my phone out but I probably had 10 seconds to react and my phone was in my handbag. She only stopped due to cars being on the road she wanted to join so I had very little time to react. I hit (or strongly tapped) her car just to get her attention enough to put the phone down as raising my voice didn't work.

To everyone saying I screamed at her, at no point did I say I screamed. I raised my voice but did not scream or swear at her.

With regards to damage I would be very surprised. I'm not a bodybuilder with huge strength and I hit the car with my hand not an object. If she comes up to me and wants damages I'll be happy for her to report me to the police as I have pictures of her illegal parking and it would be my word versus hers plus there is a chance she didn't hear it as she was playing music quite loud. I'm pretty sure she would have noticed me shouting at her but there is a slight chance she didn't as she just ignored me.

Again in hindsight there was a chance she could have got out and hit me but I took my chances as I thought the chances of her hitting someone with the car was higher. As I've said I have evidence of her ignoring driving laws regularly so I strongly feel that she probably does this a lot. She probably still will but if there is a chance that she won't do it anymore (mobile use not the parking) then maybe I've saved a life.

I think in future I'll try to get a picture and if I can't I'll just leave them to it.

Oh dear OP. I think you need to take up a hobby to channel your anger better. Maybe kickboxing? 😂😂

Firecarrier · 08/10/2022 11:38

Raquelos · 07/10/2022 20:20

What a weird thing to get so invested in that you would respond so aggressively. YABU to behave like that and set such a horrible example for your child.

Yes, imagine being invested in the safety of innocent children. Do you do the type of selfish things mentioned in the post?

Firecarrier · 08/10/2022 11:46

Shiningstarr · 08/10/2022 08:09

YABU

The parking at the school obviously irritates you, but it's not your job to try to police this. How does it affect you exactly? Apart from annoying you, what will happen if you just left it?

As for shouting and banging on her car, totally wrong. Yes, she is in the wrong, but it's not your job to police people. You just made yourself look like a lunatic, those other parents that looked around now think you've got a screw loose.

And what example are you setting for your child here? That it's ok to whack peoples cars if they are doing something wrong?

If you had hit my car, you would have regretted it, let me tell you.

How would she regret it please do tell us.

I find it telling that there are some people who value an inanimate manufactured item above human life.

As for 'how was it affecting you' it may surprise you but many of us in the world have a strong sense of justice and doing the right thing even when it is not us directly affected.

When I see comments like this it makes me realise those videos that show people minding their own business and walking on by when something bad is happening to someone aren't fake 🙄

Original poster

Lauren1983 · 08/10/2022 11:59

Ha to the kickboxing. I'm not a confrontational person normally but since having my daughter I do find myself standing up for myself a bit more. I'm normally very quiet but I saw my daughter and her friends being put in possible danger and I felt angry and afraid.

OP posts:

Crumpleton · 08/10/2022 12:02

I think if I see her on Monday I will apologise.

I certainly wouldn't apologise in this instance if she's that ignorant to be scrolling through her phone when school children are in the area she'll probably take that as you saying she wasn't in the wrong.

If she has the cheek to say the thud frightened her and her DC tell her a thud from hitting and inguring someone will do more than just frighten them.
Especially if caused when witnessed being on her phone.

Shiningstarr · 08/10/2022 12:25

Lauren1983 · 08/10/2022 11:59

Ha to the kickboxing. I'm not a confrontational person normally but since having my daughter I do find myself standing up for myself a bit more. I'm normally very quiet but I saw my daughter and her friends being put in possible danger and I felt angry and afraid.

How old is your daughter?

5zeds · 08/10/2022 19:15

I think feeling angry and afraid at behaviour that is recently illegal points more to being easily influenced by media than a logical response. It’s the sort of thinking that leads to lynch mobs and vigilantes. Attacking a car physically and screaming at someone! Is that really who you want to be? Is it who you want to model for your children?

MenonC · 08/10/2022 19:19

You are definitely being unreasonable to bang on her car yes! Let's hope you don't bump into her on the school run...

Original poster

Lauren1983 · 08/10/2022 20:28

MenonC · 08/10/2022 19:19

You are definitely being unreasonable to bang on her car yes! Let's hope you don't bump into her on the school run...

I probably will. I'm not sure she will confront me as she didn't at the time. If she wants to argue I'll just point out she is dangerous and I was concerned for her, her kids and others lives but I'm not really after a confrontation.

OP posts:

Shiningstarr · 08/10/2022 20:34

I probably will. I'm not sure she will confront me as she didn't at the time. If she wants to argue I'll just point out she is dangerous and I was concerned for her, her kids and others lives but I'm not really after a confrontation.

You're not after a confrontation?!!!!

After shouting at her and banging on her car, you're not after a confrontation?

Hmm ok.

5zeds · 08/10/2022 20:37

Of course she didn’t respond at the time she probably thought you’d lost control (she’d be right). I’d be livid if someone had done that with my children in the car. You’re just steaming because you don’t like her parking where she does and seem to think that justifies you behaving appallingly.

Crumpleton · 08/10/2022 20:38

Lauren1983 · 08/10/2022 20:28

I probably will. I'm not sure she will confront me as she didn't at the time. If she wants to argue I'll just point out she is dangerous and I was concerned for her, her kids and others lives but I'm not really after a confrontation.

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Definitely wouldn't say you were concerned for her and her kids..
I'd tell her if she thinks so little of her own kids and chooses to put their lives in danger then that's fine. But not to do it when other innocent people are around.

Original poster

Lauren1983 · 08/10/2022 20:39

Jeez from now on I'll just keep quiet and say nothing. I walk home with my daughter so it will be someone else she will risk ploughing into. In all honesty although she came down the road I wanted to cross she wasn't really putting me or my daughter at risk so not my place to intervene.

OP posts:

WiddlinDiddlin · 08/10/2022 20:43

Lots of police areas now accept video evidence of crimes, submitted through operation Snap - you can easily check if yours does and submit evidence of driving offences - make sure you film as much as you can, don't swear or do anything aggressive, state what is happening if you can, and send it to them - don't upload it to FB as though thats perfectly legal, it can cause problems.