Page 12 | To ask what is the biggest mistake you've made in your life

Smileeriley · 2022-10-03T23:39:38+00:00

Mine is a double whammy, getting married and buying my current house. The house in particular is a noose around my neck. I'm basically renting it from my mortgage company and it will never be mine. Worst thing I ever did was but this house with my ex husband. He's a whole other thread.

JJsdadisatwat · 05/10/2022 12:46

kittenkipping · 05/10/2022 12:38

I regret trusting a woman so much, that she became more than my friend, close as a sister. I really trusted her, with mine and my childrens feelings. I supported her and put myself out so much, on so many occasions, only to find out that she didn't actually care about us at all. She was using me. And once she'd exhausted my goodwill she brutally burnt the relationship to the ground with both my and my children's feelings thrown to the dogs. I can handle it, but one of my daughters has had to have counselling and both have serious trust issues having been through it. I know that it will negatively impact all the relationships they have as they witnessed exactly how cruel and selfish people can be, we were all so blind sided and they are so young to have learnt that you can trust no one. I wish so much that I'd kept her as just a casual friend and never brought her into my children's lives. I've hurt them by not protecting them. It's awful to lose my "best" friend, but that's nothing to the knowledge that my children are hurt because of my idiocy.

I had similar happen to me.

I will never trust anyone or have a friend again. I’m so sorry you went through it too.

averageavocado · 05/10/2022 13:00

DimplesToadfoot · 04/10/2022 04:16

Being born!

My mother had an affair, I was conceived. Her husband found out and divorced her. In one fell swoop, I had ruined his life, her life and then my half sisters as she stayed with her dad so I did her out of a mum. Apparently my mother tried to abort me but I was that evil I crawled out of the bucket to spite her. My mother then abandoned me to be raised in a children's home, so I was a burden on the state, total scum of the earth. I'm living proof why abortions should always be available and legal to all

not seen if anyone has replied to this, but you didnt do anything wrong, you were let down by the person meant to love and nurture you

Threebutterflies · 05/10/2022 13:00

@1256babyor455
This is so sad . I completely understand as my regret is the same as yours. Id do anything to have my child back 😞

DrunkOnCheese · 05/10/2022 15:07

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DrunkOnCheese · 05/10/2022 15:08

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Ameanstreakamilewide · 05/10/2022 15:28

TeapotCollection · 04/10/2022 08:17

When I first left home at 19, I rented a flat. One day there was a knock at the door. I opened it and there was a man standing there saying he was thinking about buying the flat and could he have a look round

I LET HIM IN!

Thankfully I was very poor and had nothing worth nicking but 31 years on I still shudder at my horrendous misjudgment

Thank Christ it was only your pride that was hurt!

LovedFedAndNoonesDead · 05/10/2022 17:04

Did something stupid to cut corners at work, no excuse and ended up losing job and career pathway that I’d worked really hard to get into. No hope of going back after that and, with no other direction, spent next few years in minimum wage, long hours jobs with no progression and even less chance at a social life.
Now been out of the workforce for a number of years having moved and little to no chance of getting any other job than another dead end minimum wage job where managers don’t care about the people they manage, and where you have to work shit unsocial hours that no one else wants.
Never told anyone about it outside the union rep and investigation/disciplinary panel. Colleagues were told I’d chosen to move on when a vacancy I applied for hadn’t been offered to me so role I was doing was coming to an end. Even DH doesn’t know the truth about it.

FooFooFloofyFoof · 05/10/2022 18:41

Getting married (3 times) searching for someone to love me. All 3 were abusive (surprise surprise given my attraction to narcs) but I got rid of them, learned to love myself and now have a great career, lovely kids. - a beautiful home of my own and loads of friends.

Jangletangle · 05/10/2022 18:48

My career choice, I didn’t realise how much happier I could be doing something else until I was nearly 50. I didn’t think there was anything wrong, nursing is something I was so proud of but the NHS absolutely broke me. Also, they claim to be family friendly and they really aren’t!

Diplidocus4 · 05/10/2022 19:53

Thinking someone who claimed to love me wouldn't lie whilst looking at me straight in the face .....

GloriousGlory · 05/10/2022 19:56

Threebutterflies · 05/10/2022 13:00

@1256babyor455
This is so sad . I completely understand as my regret is the same as yours. Id do anything to have my child back 😞

Oh bless your heart ❤️ xx

GloriousGlory · 05/10/2022 19:58

1256babyor455 · 05/10/2022 08:47

Having an abortion I'd be holding a newborn right now.

I wholeheartedly agree it was the best decision for my family. Just not the best decision for me. It's eroded my mental health and I'll never be the same person again.

You're a wonderful person and mother who put their family before themselves. Find peace with the choice you had to make.

Virtual hugs to you ❤️

YennefersDress · 05/10/2022 20:01

Oh, being born basically.

Marrying my awful abusive ex. Selling my much loved home to be with abusive ex. He's destroyed my life, nothing is as I planned, I can't give my kids the home they deserve, he's refused to settle finances in the years since we split and I've spent a fortune on solicitors to no avail, I've watched house prices keep getting higher and higher in the meantime and now there's the current shitshow thanks to the bastard tories.

I hate my life so much and have no choice but to carry on for the sake of my kids. I won't do anything but I'm trapped and I wish it wasn't like this.

Stinkybrambles · 05/10/2022 20:04

Waiting to get my uti treated because the miu closed early and the nhs website said it may clear up without treatment. It meant my infection became embedded and two years later I am still with the fall out from this decision. If I could turn the clock back I would have got treatment earlier and insisted on a longer course of antibiotics than 3 days.

Fluffyduckling1 · 05/10/2022 20:09

Pretending I was straight until I was 37, I cry thinking about my wasted life.

Homewardbound2022 · 05/10/2022 20:20

Moving to a neighbouring country for a boyfriend in my mid 20s. Knew immediately it was a mistake and took 3 or 4 years to get out.
Buying a house in a small village just before the economic crash in 2007. It's rented out now but I'd love to sell it and get rid. Don't want to live there again and my tenant doesn't want to buy it.

CarriesHandbag · 05/10/2022 20:24

ChiefPearlClutcher · 04/10/2022 02:57

I should never have given up work after first child was born.

Same for me too. I loved my job but felt I should remain at home with the children. It’s taken away my confidence and damaged my mental health. I feel I haven’t provided my children with a positive role model.

GloriousGlory · 05/10/2022 20:35

Fluffyduckling1 · 05/10/2022 20:09

Pretending I was straight until I was 37, I cry thinking about my wasted life.

Sadly I think this may be a common one.

❤️

PrincessArora · 05/10/2022 21:24

Trusting the nhs maternity team who told me they would look after me 7 years ago but didn’t, leaving my daughter with significant brain damage which has caused life changing injuries and mean she will never be independent, walk, talk or care for herself and has to be fed through a tube. My life is now a constant round of caring, I can no longer work and whilst I love her very much, I regret having her and limitations she has had imposed on her life and in turn mine and my partners.

LuciaPopp · 05/10/2022 21:30

PrincessArora · 05/10/2022 21:24

Trusting the nhs maternity team who told me they would look after me 7 years ago but didn’t, leaving my daughter with significant brain damage which has caused life changing injuries and mean she will never be independent, walk, talk or care for herself and has to be fed through a tube. My life is now a constant round of caring, I can no longer work and whilst I love her very much, I regret having her and limitations she has had imposed on her life and in turn mine and my partners.

I'm so sorry this happened to you.

Always4Brenner · 05/10/2022 21:45

PrincessArora · 05/10/2022 21:24

Trusting the nhs maternity team who told me they would look after me 7 years ago but didn’t, leaving my daughter with significant brain damage which has caused life changing injuries and mean she will never be independent, walk, talk or care for herself and has to be fed through a tube. My life is now a constant round of caring, I can no longer work and whilst I love her very much, I regret having her and limitations she has had imposed on her life and in turn mine and my partners.

Tragic just tragic lives ruined because people didn’t do their job properly.

AvocadoRock · 05/10/2022 22:27

I had an abortion in 2008. I was 27.
I was about six months into with my DH, there was an 'overlap' of his last relationship and the start of ours. I knew his ex wasn't mentally in a very good place, I thought that me being pregnant would possibly lead to her doing something silly. At the time it was the right decision. But now we have two wonderful children and I often wonder what their big brother or sister would be like. I have to not think about it too much.

DaughterofDawn · 06/10/2022 14:15

I wasted four years and $60,000 going to university.

DetoxWithChocs · 06/10/2022 15:56

ChiefPearlClutcher · 04/10/2022 02:57

I should never have given up work after first child was born.

Same. I now do some hours contracting but it’s not many hours, little scope to add more, plus unreliable and no benefits.

I wonder if I’d still be with my husband if I had a good income of my own.

TreadSoftlyOnMyDreams · 06/10/2022 16:24

TheVillageShop · 04/10/2022 00:43

Mine's too terrible to post. I wrote it out but it looked so terrible I erased it. Shocked me, even after 50 years.

Is he still under the patio?