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Original poster

Cost of living faux confusion - is this the new non-binary?

107 replies

WomanStanleyWoman2 · 03/10/2022 14:49

A couple of years back there was a whole spate of threads from people claiming they “didn’t understand” the concept of being non-binary and, while they absolutely weren’t being judgemental in any way (heaven forbid!), they were terribly confused what it all meant and wanted to be educated. “I just want to understand, explain it to me” ad infinitum.

Those seem to have died out a bit now - but faux confusion over cost of living threads seems to be the replacement. More and more threads are going down the route of “But I don’t understand, I went to the shops on Thursday and people were actually buying things, so how can there be a cost of living crisis?! Who is spending all this money? And I don’t mean shitholes full of common people discount shops like Aldi and Poundland - I mean NICE shops like M&S Foodhall and Waitrose! So where is this cost of living crisis? I’m sooooo confuuuused!!!”

I can’t be the only one thinking that this basically translates to “If there was a REAL cost of living crisis people would be rummaging in the gutters for bruised apples instead of spending actual money in nice shops and rubbing shoulders with the likes of me - therefore they should all stop moaning and go and chew on an Asda Essential”?

OP posts:
sóh₂wl̥ · 03/10/2022 16:00

I dislike faux naivety,pretense of simplicity or innocence; disingenuousness posts - but it wasn't immediately clear from first post this was what was meant.

However cost of living isn't hitting everywhere the same despite what some posters and media claim - and people pointing this out often are't being devious point scorers just a bit confused wandering why what they are being told isn't matching their lived experience.

ReneBumsWombats · 03/10/2022 16:03

That's a strange comparison to make.

ReneBumsWombats · 03/10/2022 16:04

I think you’ve missed the point…

I think I have too. Can you rephrase?

Xiaoxiong · 03/10/2022 16:05

ocadodeliveroo · 03/10/2022 15:56

I may sound really backwards, but what the hell is non binary?

It's been explained to me as someone who doesn't feel that their gender is binary, ie. male or female. So someone who feels that they are neither male nor female, or someone who feels they're "a bit of both".

What I don't understand about this is that it posits the existence of a binary (male and female), which in terms of gender identity consists entirely of the most regressive sexist stereotypes about what "male" and "female" genders are.

AStar98 · 03/10/2022 16:06

What a nonsense, pointless post.

2ndMrsdeWinter · 03/10/2022 16:09

Either I’m to thick to make links between these two topics or you’re on drugs.

x2boys · 03/10/2022 16:12

Well the cost of living crisis is very real and people are worried about paying their gas and electric whereas non binary is just a concept for people to feel , special and different.

Softplayhooray · 03/10/2022 16:12

To me it seems obvious what OP meant - just like binary and non binary, people KNOW what it means but want to twist the knife and gently mock the people who might be struggling with it, just as people struggle with the cost of living crisis.

Croque · 03/10/2022 16:13

Words fail me, what did I just read.

riverlegslights · 03/10/2022 16:13

x2boys · 03/10/2022 16:12

Well the cost of living crisis is very real and people are worried about paying their gas and electric whereas non binary is just a concept for people to feel , special and different.

This is nearer the truth…

WolfWolf · 03/10/2022 16:15

It doesn't matter what you do or don't identify with, you are still one of the two sexes

The rest is personality, which develops across a broad and colourful spectrum of traditionally 'feminine', 'masculine' or 'gender neutral' traits and preferences.

Softplayhooray · 03/10/2022 16:16

Croque · 03/10/2022 16:13

Words fail me, what did I just read.

Assuming that was directed at me, you've clearly misunderstood my post, as I don't know why it would make words fail you.

It's irrelevant what I and you think of what non binary means, or which is more real. The point is, people are using faux confusion in both cases as a response to both.

GyozaGuiting · 03/10/2022 16:17

I think the media tries to whip everyone into a frenzy.
In my day to day life people are being a little more cautious with money, but 3 neighbours of 6 in my road have just bought high end cars (porches, Tesla), people are still eating out, going on holiday…
when I was a kid we couldn’t even afford a take away every month, I had very few clothes.
So it’s not faux confusion, it’s just the reality that there a great many people who not in ‘crisis’.

Wanderingowl · 03/10/2022 16:19

JohnsShirt · 03/10/2022 14:53

I still don't understand non binary and no one has ever been able to explain it in a way that makes the slightest bit of sense

It's attention seekers demanding attention without having to actually try anything to actually achieve it. 😊

BadNomad · 03/10/2022 16:21

Oh look. A thread full of people pretending they don't know what you're saying. 🙄

Johnnysgirl · 03/10/2022 16:23

BadNomad · 03/10/2022 16:21

Oh look. A thread full of people pretending they don't know what you're saying. 🙄

Don't be stupid.

ReneBumsWombats · 03/10/2022 16:25

Oh look. A thread full of people pretending they don't know what you're saying. 🙄

I don't. Honestly I don't. I'm not doing the Mumsnet "I find it baffling" thing. I don't understand what she's trying to say.

I would understand if OP was saying that people are being obtuse about the cost of living crisis. That makes sense. It's the lumping it in with being non-binary that doesn't make sense to me. What's the connection? What does being non-binary have to do with it and how is that supposed to shape my thoughts on the cost of living crisis?

sóh₂wl̥ · 03/10/2022 16:25

Pining down definitions ins't the worst idea as people can have different understanding of terms.

I was on a Halloween thread that got nasty due to regional variations on names for root vegetables - swede, turnips sometime swap which vegetable they mean across UK as whole and even just English regions - then there neeps and rutabaga - a new word to me -and at end I wasn't sure beetroot was referring to same vegetable as I grew up with.

Non binary - I understood to be a rejection of sex based stereotypes - but I've seen people insist it has nothing to do with stereotypes/sex based assumptions roles - so it can be confusing.

Amarette · 03/10/2022 16:26

It's not faux confusion about non-binary.

If a person think they're neither male or female they are not in touch with reality. I think what they really mean is that they don't conform to gender stereotypes. It doesn't change their sex. So saying someone is non-binary as in they are neither male nor female makes no sense at all in reality.

badbaduncle · 03/10/2022 16:26

All that happened re Non Binary is we all realised it is utter nonsense that collapses the moment you analyse it and almost everyone sees this. So I stopped discussing it.
Cost of living crisis is real though

sóh₂wl̥ · 03/10/2022 16:27

BadNomad · 03/10/2022 16:21

Oh look. A thread full of people pretending they don't know what you're saying. 🙄

It was an incredibly unclear opening post - though I do think OP made it clearer with subsequent posts. I think it's lack of clarity rather than faux MN naivety.

AryaStarkWolf · 03/10/2022 16:27

WolfWolf · 03/10/2022 16:15

It doesn't matter what you do or don't identify with, you are still one of the two sexes

The rest is personality, which develops across a broad and colourful spectrum of traditionally 'feminine', 'masculine' or 'gender neutral' traits and preferences.

Exactly fellow Wolf 😁

35965a · 03/10/2022 16:27

Non-binary is still bollocks, cost of living crisis is not.

Xenia · 03/10/2022 16:28

People can be very insensitive to others who are suffering. That's all there is to it. I would not equate any of it with being trans etc however - perhaps we can leave that out of the cost of living issues.

Croque · 03/10/2022 16:29

Perhaps the point is that I can buy a carrot from Lidl and melons from Waitrose without having to explain why I am shopping in two different places. I can also buy a Father Christmas beard from Poundland and because of the new flexibility, nobody is allowed to say that it is fake or only designed to be worn by men.