I earn £60k and I can’t keep my family warm

[Theyarellthesame]

Exactly that and I’m so, so frightened.

im 31 and I’ve done everything ‘right’ - went to uni, got myself a job and in 8 years increased my wage from £16k to £60k. We waited 13 years to have a baby until we’d saved up £20k so I could afford maternity leave, had £6k-ish left over after mat leave.

I live rurally in one of the cheapest areas in the country in a 4 bed Victorian semi, it’s not grand in any way. Lovely, but a basic 4 bed, 3 storey family home. When we moved in I had the loft insulated but we can’t have a smart meter because of something to do with where the meter is located.

My DH is a SAHP so no childcare costs for my 18 month old and he’d only be able to earn minimum wage so his take home pay per hour would be less than the cost of childcare, hence why he’s a SAHP.

Yesterday I got an email from bulb putting my direct debit up again from £290
to £470. It was £120 2 years ago. On top of everything else going up I just categorically cannot afford to pay that. There isn’t enough money by £149 a month to cover the bills for the household.

I think my options are to cancel paying in to my pension to free up that money or stop paying my student loan? Can you do student loan holidays?

mortgage is on a 5 year fix with 2 years left at 1.99% so that’s as low as it can go, we don’t have Netflix, sky or Prime anymore, we just have a TV license. We do have a Spotify subscription. Both our phones are on £20 a month contracts, we don’t have any debt other than student loans and the mortgage. We do have a dog and his pet insurance is £60 a month but it’s none- negotiable that we keep that going.

We batch cook using the instant pot to avoid putting the oven on, we do use the washing machine a lot because we use reusable nappies. I drive a plug in hybrid so the electric is high because of that.

We have 1 or 2 U.K. holidays a year, usually a static caravan or holiday cottage for a few days. Total cost of holidays per year is around £1k so I’ve already knocked saving for those on the head.

No chance of my wage increasing again any time soon, I’ve pushed very hard for the last 8 years to climb a very greasy ladder and there’s no where else to go from here.

WTF do I do?! There’s news all the time how this is going to get worse again in January and the only advice coming out seems to be ‘go and get a better paid job’ but I HAVE a well paid job! we want another baby but I’m currently telling DH no because we can’t afford it and need to save like crazy.

Im very very frightened, how much worse is it likely to get from here?

A non earning adult is a luxury few households can afford nowadays, so your husband should try to work at least part time, maybe one weekend day.

@RJnomore1 I stand corrected! You are right, it's the Marriage Allowance. www.gov.uk/marriage-allowance Unfortunately the OP doesn't qualify though as she is a higher rate tax payer.

Only basic rate taxpayers can share the marriage tax allowance, OP is higher rate

Keep persisting with getting a smart meter. Companies don't want you to have it because it entitles you to cheaper rates, but if your DH kept persisting they may be able to sort it out for you.

I too would like to know where the rest of the money is going?

Do you have car payments for this hybrid? (luxury car)

How much are your student loans?

Exactly this. I fail to see how the OP is struggling,

I agree that there’s some missing money as you should be on around 3.5k take home as I earn 59k and take home around 3.5k after pension contributions. I do think your DH needs to take more shifts at the bar, weekend too, if he’s only doing 2 evenings a week then he has capacity to do a bit more. Nursery’s might be £8.50 an hour but what about childminders?

I would recommend that everyone checks their usage and compare it to the projected use.

Utility companies are buggers for over estimating. One company would calculate the usage over 18 months but divide by 12. Sure you would eventually get a rebate or debit reduction but in the meantime your money was earning interest in their bank account

This. I smell a rat

EV tariffs are only really of any benefit if you have very little daytime usage. I imagine a SAHP with child would struggle to limit daytime usage, which would result in higher bills.

My husband earns less than you and I am a sahp, and we managed by taking a longer term over the mortgage length to take payments down to just over 600.00 a month. Asking to take a student loan break may help. What temp do you keep the house? We keep it to 19/20 and wear jumpers.

Worst case I will have to take a job working evenings when the little ones in bed and husband can do childcare. Is that an option too?

Sorry as I know it's your DH hobby but have you looked at renting out the garage?

“He currently has more demand than time to fulfil orders”

Working evenings and weekends one of the “non negotiables”?

You’re supposedly unable to heat your home, yet your answer to a letting agent saying you’ll struggle to get a lodger isn’t to just go ahead and advertise (for free) anyway? There’s a housing crisis. Just because it’s not prime letting material doesn’t mean you can’t get someone.

… and a double garage too 😊

Were you brought up at Buckingham Palace ?

Student loan repayments could be high at £60k. Not £1600 high, I grant you.

Agree. And the fact that a quick log into her bulb account would likely solve the problem appears to be too much of a reach.

'I just love the drama, Mick'

The maths don’t add up. At all

with the dhs money there’s 3.5k plus going in the house hold

Ok OP so for now he needs to spend the time he does making those instruments - which actually sound really beautiful - earning properly for the family.

He can take his hobby back up when finances are more stable but right now you need him to be earning more.

Op an you share you actual costs for everything? How much is the electric and gas, how much is your food bills, mortgage, CT etc. There might be something someone sees.

If your take home is say 3k then £800 mortgage, £200 CT, £300 power, £60 pet insurance, £40 water, that's not even half of your wage gone. Where's the rest going?

Specifically a ukulele luthier and guitar decorator is really a hobby, not an occupation for all but the already secure. That's why many work in music shops, give lessons and do any number of things to pay their bills. He's also very dependent upon uke groups operating which, following covid, has dramatically decreased due to the average age of the majority of players that are in the financial position to buy a custom instrument.

It makes more sense for him to work as many evenings as he can in a normal job. It's no different to somebody working all day and then taking care of their children in the evening and overnight, so it's not 'too much for him', it's just what parents do.

Yes something is missing here your take home pay doesn’t match what your saying. Yes you may have to give up holidays to put the heating on but that’s a decision to make. I’d suggest you sit down and list you incomings and outgoing rather than panic.

What @rookiemere said--if you have a woodshop, maybe you could advertise it to rent 3 days a week to another artisan? If your husband can't use it all the time anyway.

Presumably a lot of the 'disposable' income goes onto DH's hobby. And let's face it, that's what it is, a hobby.

There’s a huge amount of money you haven’t mentioned. Stats show you have a household income in the top 20%. The majority (ie more than 50%) of households in the UK are functioning on an income 36k or less.

Nights shifs are a really bad idea. If they have a small child he/needs to be looked after during the day. A toddler cannot be left alone while an adult is sleeping during the day. Only option is one working some hours in the evening and or weekends.