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AIBU?

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Original poster

To want to message my exes wife over This or is it harassment ?

93 replies

inthedarkx · 30/09/2022 20:33

So my 16 year old has just text me at her dads and wife house that her son ( not my exes) has gone to his mum ( my 16 year old overheard) that he said to his mum G ( my son) has diseased fingers. And his mum didn't do anything!! My daughter said she feels like crying that my son is being insulted in that way. And his mum doesn't seem bothered. To me it seems like this kid has overheard my ex and his wife slagging off my parenting in front of her son ( they always comment how bad parent I am) and the son is now picking up on it and laughing with his mum that my child has 'diseased fingers'
This kid we are talking about is around 9/10 not sure exact age. If I tell my ex he will just ignore it and if my daughter tells him he will ignore it, so I want to message the mum as I'm sad my son has been spoke About to her in this manner and didn't even punish her son for bullying! My daughter feels like crying after hearing that!!

OP posts:
vodkaredbullgirl · 30/09/2022 20:36

Diseased fingers????

scrufffy · 30/09/2022 20:37

Diseases fingers ?

WhiskersPete · 30/09/2022 20:37

Ffs

DrAddisonForbesMontgomery · 30/09/2022 20:37

Sorry but this doesn't make much sense?

KvotheTheBloodless · 30/09/2022 20:37

What?! I don't understand your post, it's not clear who said what to whom. How old are the kids involved?

Starsinyoureyes13 · 30/09/2022 20:38

The stepmum sounds immature, I wouldn't have any of my kids bully, and wouldn't be pleased.
I'd rather my kid have diseased fingers(whatever they are) than a diseased personality.

J0y · 30/09/2022 20:38

It sounds so ridiculous that it is hard to know what the insult is. Is your son hurt?

WhiskersPete · 30/09/2022 20:39

As in like gangrene? Leprosy maybe?

AnneLovesGilbert · 30/09/2022 20:39

You’ll have to try again. But this sort of post is useful in explaining why we don’t all want our DH’s ex to have our phone numbers.

Is your 16 year old prone to drama and crying for hours over perceived insults from other people to each other?

J0y · 30/09/2022 20:40

Does your son have cerebral palsy?

AlisonDonut · 30/09/2022 20:40

What?

MarshaMelrose · 30/09/2022 20:41

Does he have a skin condition or something? Instead of crying, why didn't your daughter explain your sons illness to her younger stepbrother? Or maybe I've misunderstood?

girlmom21 · 30/09/2022 20:41

So your kid and his step brother have been shitty to each other and then his step moms being a knob? Sounds like everyone needs to grow up.

JessesMum777888 · 30/09/2022 20:41

I’m really confused 😐

Original poster
inthedarkx · 30/09/2022 20:41

In other words he's insulting my son as being a diseased child. It's the fact he's bullying my child to his mum and she says nothing. They've never liked my children
And his mum has always slagged me off to her 13 year old daughter so now she's the same with my daughters
Her son is around 9/10
My son is 6
Her son is always nasty towards my son every time he goes there

OP posts:
FatAgainItsLettuceTime · 30/09/2022 20:41

So your son and daughter are at their dads house and their stepbrother who is about 9 yrs old has made a silly comment to his mum in private about your son having diseased fingers.

Your 16 yr old daughter has overheard this and called you, you are now wanting to complain because you think your exs wife hasn't dealt with it.

Is that right?

If that is right then you're over reacting, you have no idea what has or hasn't been said to the stepbrother because you're not there.

Wait till you collect your kids or they're dropped off and talk to your ex about your daughter being upset by the comment. Be calm and have a grown up, reasonable, adult conversation to find out what has actually happened.

lickenchugget · 30/09/2022 20:42

Is there an issue with your son’s fingers?

Yabu to text your ex’s wife; your communication should be with your ex.

J0y · 30/09/2022 20:43

If somebody had called my son a diseased child he would have shrugged. Is there some health issue that makes the accusation hurtful??

Original poster
inthedarkx · 30/09/2022 20:44

No there is no issues with my son at all, this boy always says nasty things about my son every time he goes. And my ex and the wife don't do nothing
My 6 year old gets called a 'baby' if he gets upset
That's my point why is a grown woman allowing my son to be bullied by hers

OP posts:
FatAgainItsLettuceTime · 30/09/2022 20:48

inthedarkx · 30/09/2022 20:44

No there is no issues with my son at all, this boy always says nasty things about my son every time he goes. And my ex and the wife don't do nothing
My 6 year old gets called a 'baby' if he gets upset
That's my point why is a grown woman allowing my son to be bullied by hers

So when this has happened in the past have you had a rational and constructive conversation with your ex about it? If so what did he say?

Starsinyoureyes13 · 30/09/2022 20:48

inthedarkx · 30/09/2022 20:44

No there is no issues with my son at all, this boy always says nasty things about my son every time he goes. And my ex and the wife don't do nothing
My 6 year old gets called a 'baby' if he gets upset
That's my point why is a grown woman allowing my son to be bullied by hers

She feels threatened by her husbands biological children. A good all rounded woman who knows she's stepmother to her husbands children will happily accept them and treat them kindly, someone who is threatened in her position will treat the children horribly... The wife is the latter.

They seem charming and apples don't fall far from trees.

lickenchugget · 30/09/2022 20:48

That's my point why is a grown woman allowing my son to be bullied by hers

Your ex is allowing this.

scrufffy · 30/09/2022 20:51

Where's his father in all this?

Teddeh · 30/09/2022 20:52

Did your 6yo hear the comment, and is he upset about it? If not, I'd ask your daughter not to repeat it. If so, I'd try to downplay it to both of them as wrong but silly/meaningless, and address the larger bullying issue directly with your ex.

ChimneyPot · 30/09/2022 20:54

Is a private conversation that your 6 year old never heard and was never meant to hear bullying?

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