AIBU to think life would be better in Canada?

[ButtercupsAndBluebells]

I've always been very happy with my life in the UK, but I am starting to feel so disillusioned (as many others are too, judging by several other threads I've read today). My brother moved to Canada (Calgary, Alberta) a few years ago and is currently staying with us for a visit. Although he hasn't been openly critical or boastful, it's obvious that he's been taken aback by how things have deteriorated here. He seems to have such a wonderful life, and it's left me feeling very flat about my own.

I know I shouldn't compare, but it's hard not to. DH and I have similar jobs to my brother and SIL. They have the huge house and cars, a fantastic family doctor, a mobile home that they take into the mountains most weekends, access to the most incredible wilderness despite living in a city. In contrast, we have a small 3 bed terrace without any parking, disposable income is shrinking month by month and let's not even mention the state of the NHS. We live in a really nice area, but there's still litter everywhere and it's like nobody cares about their surroundings.

I have done some reading online and I think we'd have a good chance of being accepted to migrate ourselves, but would it really be that different? I'm tying myself in knots thinking about it. Please can someone either talk me down or give me some encouragement!

As if…

My comment about the British sense of humour wasn't aimed specifically at you, but it has been mentioned several times on this thread as somehow being better than other places' sense of humour.

NZ was fun for a visit but the thought of living there was claustrophobic.

Do you actually know what claustrophobic means?

NZ was fun for a visit but the thought of living there was claustrophobic.

Do you actually know what claustrophobic means?

I get what this poster meant. I lived in NZ and Australia and it is very confining. I loved my time in both and would happily go back to Oz for a couple of years but long term I know I'd end up with that "claustrophobic" feeling and have to come back to Europe. Environmental impact aside, we're quite spoilt here with being able to hop on cheap, short flights to completely different countries in a way that's just not possible in NZ. When you're there you're pretty much stuck there!

'Honey' ?? WTF??!! 🤣🤣🙄

@Yellownotblue I'm so so sorry!!! I have to blame work stresses and peri meno brain for that! I bloody visited there in 2018 so no idea why I said Halifax was Newfoundland! [facepalm]!!!

That's OK, they're quite busy biting chunks out of each other on this thread already ...

As for those bashing Trudeau, I agree there's a lot to object to, but have you seen what the opposition's got lined up? Their leader is the worst kind of mini-Trump. Not an appealing prospect.

@blobby10 no need to apologise! Now you sound Canadian 😂

As for the JT bashing… we have a policy to send asylum seekers to Rwanda FFS. Rape has been effectively decriminalised. The largest police force in the country is in special measures. We’re pumping sewage straight into the sea. I love this country, it is my home, but enough with the rose tinted glasses! Politics here are no better than in Canada.

So, @ButtercupsAndBluebells has this discussion helped you make your mind up about moving to Canada?

Rape has been effectively decriminalised @Yellownotblue Eh?

@MarianneOnAMotorcycle Yes. Here’s one source, but if Google it you will find many more.

www.theguardian.com/society/2020/jul/14/we-are-facing-the-decriminalisation-of-warns-victims-commissioner

@Ritascornershop absolutely agree with you that action is the thing that really matters. Sometimes over apologising scores some weird points but achieves nothing or, worse, actually gets in the way of fixing the thing because people feel like hey, work is done! That’s not good.

@Pilipalapal

Honestly I’ve never heard anything of the sort. People generally immigrate to establish towns and cities, rather than trying to survive in the wilderness….

They do but I still think there’s something in what I’m saying. For some people it comes across like it’s all a bit “frontier” to them.

The other thing that bothers me is something in the way people talk about access to “wilderness” as an amenity. It reminds me a lot of this article about Skye from the weekend. There’s such a colonial flavour to it it’s almost parodical amp.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2022/oct/02/western-isles-scotland-walk-think-back-to-the-life-i-love-edward-docx

@FloorWipes absolutely it lets people feel they’ve done their bit by changing their profile photo on fb to Every Child Matters, it wearing an orange shirt (ditto pink shirt for bullying day).

I’m sure that the powers that be love it that voters don’t think they need to do anything beyond wearing or posting the right image. Most Canadians I know have never actually spoken to a FN person, and it’s both a bit theoretical to them and something they can feel Sad about, to check in with themselves that they’re good people. It makes me a bit cross actually. I have very close family members who are FN and I’d like to see actual change in the circumstances of Indigenous people, and working class people in general (rich and middle class Indigenous not requiring change in their circumstances). Voting and grassroots community work make change: apologies and tshirts do not.

Well, it didn't go the way I thought it would that's for sure! I was expecting a few light anecdotes rather than a full on political debate. All of the replies are much appreciated though and have given me plenty to think about.

Depends on where you visit. I live in the UK, and it’s far from “run down and full of despair” where I live. All countries have nicer areas and not so nice areas. It’s not just the UK.

Environmental impact aside, we're quite spoilt here with being able to hop on cheap, short flights to completely different countries in a way that's just not possible in NZ. When you're there you're pretty much stuck there!

Oh do get a grip. People in NZ travel a lot, and they go for a decent holiday, not just a week at a time (unless going to Australia). Incidentally, this is still nothing to do with the workd "claustrophobic", which means fear of being in a confined space. Incidentally, I've had several UK friends for decades and many of them have not left the UK in that time, whereas all my NZ friends regularly travel overseas.

Why not go out there for say, a year or two and then make a decision about where you want to stay?

I think it's a mistake to commit to a place before you've experienced it (and not just on holiday) as then you might feel that you've failed in some way if you go back. Speaking from experience!

For Canada, I would say rent a house somewhere rural or semi-rural (if you want to live in cities then stay in Europe!) and experience the lifestyle and the people… Those that work in the tourist industry are not necessarily representative of the general populace.