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AIBU?

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Original poster

AIBU to think life would be better in Canada?

244 replies

ButtercupsAndBluebells · 30/09/2022 15:20

I've always been very happy with my life in the UK, but I am starting to feel so disillusioned (as many others are too, judging by several other threads I've read today). My brother moved to Canada (Calgary, Alberta) a few years ago and is currently staying with us for a visit. Although he hasn't been openly critical or boastful, it's obvious that he's been taken aback by how things have deteriorated here. He seems to have such a wonderful life, and it's left me feeling very flat about my own.

I know I shouldn't compare, but it's hard not to. DH and I have similar jobs to my brother and SIL. They have the huge house and cars, a fantastic family doctor, a mobile home that they take into the mountains most weekends, access to the most incredible wilderness despite living in a city. In contrast, we have a small 3 bed terrace without any parking, disposable income is shrinking month by month and let's not even mention the state of the NHS. We live in a really nice area, but there's still litter everywhere and it's like nobody cares about their surroundings.

I have done some reading online and I think we'd have a good chance of being accepted to migrate ourselves, but would it really be that different? I'm tying myself in knots thinking about it. Please can someone either talk me down or give me some encouragement!

OP posts:
Squirrelsnut · 30/09/2022 16:42

I don't know, OP, I recently saw a documentary about the growing drug/poverty crisis in parts of Canada.
I'm sure it's breathtaking but it has its own problems.

Cassillero · 30/09/2022 16:43

DuckBilledFattypus · 30/09/2022 15:38

Can't imagine anything better than moving to a country with the immensely dislikeable authoritarian Justin Trudeau in charge.

I can't believe it took so long for this to come up in the thread. That was my first thought too!

Luredbyapomegranate · 30/09/2022 16:48

I like visiting Canada but wouldn’t want to live their personally.

But give it a go! You can always come back .

ChilliPB · 30/09/2022 16:48

MangyInseam · 30/09/2022 16:26

There is more sense of space, for sure. I find the UK does seem to close - it's part of why I find it hard to sympathize with those who think upping immigration in the UK is a great idea. You have so little room.

That being said, sometimes people don't realize that most Canadians are squashed into the strip along the US border, or into the big cities. If you go to Ontario or even Calgary there are housing estates of rabbit hutches too. And public transport and trains to get out of the city are less available than in the UK.

Even the big national parks like Banff are now increasingly crowded and expensive. They don't feel like getting away from people, that's for sure. Parks Canada is in the position of trying to increase numbers while also trying to deal with the fact that increased numbers absolutely affects the wilderness and degrades the ecosystem. You won't feel more "away" from people in a place like that compared to going to a big park in Scotland, for example.

If you are up for serious wilderness trekking yourself, days away from civilization in a canoe and not expecting any support, you can absolutely see some amazing wilderness. But that is not just casual holiday stuff, it's not cheap, and it takes some skills.

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Canada isn’t a homogenous country though. Neither is the UK. Your experience of Canada would vary by state, city or rural, interior or costal. Life in London is very different from life in rural Wales.

I made a move from London to another UK city and I would say I’m much, much happier here because the things that bothered me about London (housing costs, antisocial behaviour, long commutes to do anything including socialise, lack of ability to get outdoors to anywhere that felt a bit wild) don’t exist for me in my new city. It’s much friendlier, safer and the city itself is (IMO) much prettier than London and just generally nicer. I can get out of the city so easily to go hiking etc.

I think you need to prioritise what you want and identify what you don’t like about your current situation. Then see where fits the bill - start by identifying the problem and then try and find the solution.

ChilliPB · 30/09/2022 16:48

@MangyInseam sorry didn’t mean to quote you in my post!

TooScaredToPostOnMN · 30/09/2022 17:00

Farmageddon · 30/09/2022 15:37

Also, I know I'm going to get slated for this but I found Canadian people lovely, very friendly - but a bit dull. As in, they didn't have the same sense of humour, or ability to make fun of themselves, and took everything quite seriously. But maybe that was just my experience.

I AM Canadian - this is true. haha I moved here when I was 18 and the first time I met my (British) boyfriend's family (now my DH - we still live in the UK) it was the most awkward thing ever and all they did was take the piss out of each other and me and I quite literally hated every moment of it as I didn't know how to react! I think we have a sense of humour, but definitely not the "banter" that is so popular in this country. I still really struggle and get labelled a bit boring and dull when it comes to family gatherings (almost 12 years later!)

ddl1 · 30/09/2022 17:03

I've considered it from time to time (I'm a dual citizen, so could go to Canada without problems if I wished to) but I am seriously allergic to snow, which rather rules it out!

ddl1 · 30/09/2022 17:10

Cassillero · 30/09/2022 16:43

I can't believe it took so long for this to come up in the thread. That was my first thought too!

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Better than having Liz Truss and Kwasi Kwarteng in charge! If I chose my place of residence mainly according to the country's politics I'd probably be in Canada already by now (New Zealand might be better, but I don't have automatic rights to go there).

But also, it's necessary to remember that a lot of government functions in Canada are devolved to the provinces and one's experience may depend as much on one's provincial government as on the national government.

Calmdown14 · 30/09/2022 17:14

@ChilliPB summed it up brilliantly.

I live in a very different part of the UK to where I grew up. I have a low cost house which looks at the sea, can go on great walks from my front door, love the sense of space. It totally suits how I want to live.

But it's hours to get other places, the winter climate is not for everyone, you can't do a Just Eat order on a Friday. None of this bothers me and I feel it's a better quality of life.

My sister would say it's nice for a visit but no way could she live here!

What is it that you actually want to change?

Cornishclio · 30/09/2022 17:18

We have literally just returned from a three week trip across Canada. Their transport systems are much better but they have high levels of homelessness in cities like Toronto and Vancouver due to high housing costs. It is expensive to live there and eat out and the traffic can be bad in cities. I would say that unless you have a very good job it would be tough to find affordable housing. However it is a clean and appeared to be a very safe country. I do think the UK has deteriorated though over last few decades.

DuckBilledFattypus · 30/09/2022 17:28

Better than having Liz Truss and Kwasi Kwarteng in charge! If I chose my place of residence mainly according to the country's politics I'd probably be in Canada already by now (New Zealand might be better, but I don't have automatic rights to go there)

Well if you enjoy having a deeply authoritarian leader, where your bank account will be frozen for daring to donate to perfectly legal causes, where peaceful protests are reframed as terrorism, where actual women are no longer have sex based protections, then Canada is the perfect place for you. NZ is quite similar. You would enjoy that too. Straight out of the frying pan and into the fire.

MangyInseam · 30/09/2022 17:43

DuckBilledFattypus · 30/09/2022 17:28

Better than having Liz Truss and Kwasi Kwarteng in charge! If I chose my place of residence mainly according to the country's politics I'd probably be in Canada already by now (New Zealand might be better, but I don't have automatic rights to go there)

Well if you enjoy having a deeply authoritarian leader, where your bank account will be frozen for daring to donate to perfectly legal causes, where peaceful protests are reframed as terrorism, where actual women are no longer have sex based protections, then Canada is the perfect place for you. NZ is quite similar. You would enjoy that too. Straight out of the frying pan and into the fire.

And should JT lose the next election, which is very possible, you will get Pierre Poilievre who may not be all that different from Liz Truss, he is a man who believes deregulation is the answer to every problem. Much more of an American style libertarian than Truss could ever dream of.

Farmageddon · 30/09/2022 17:45

TooScaredToPostOnMN · 30/09/2022 17:00

I AM Canadian - this is true. haha I moved here when I was 18 and the first time I met my (British) boyfriend's family (now my DH - we still live in the UK) it was the most awkward thing ever and all they did was take the piss out of each other and me and I quite literally hated every moment of it as I didn't know how to react! I think we have a sense of humour, but definitely not the "banter" that is so popular in this country. I still really struggle and get labelled a bit boring and dull when it comes to family gatherings (almost 12 years later!)

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Apologies if I sounded insensitive. I really think it was just a difference in sense of humour or what is considered funny (like you say the slagging/ banter is very common here, but seemed to be considered quite rude or offensive there).

I'm sure some of the people I met there thought I was a total weirdo with some of the things I came out with! There was definitely a few awkward moment when I put my foot in it.

But overall people were lovely, friendly and polite and kind. But I think it would be hard to adjust to the different sense of humour at first.

MrsTerryPratchett · 30/09/2022 17:50

Farmageddon · 30/09/2022 17:45

Apologies if I sounded insensitive. I really think it was just a difference in sense of humour or what is considered funny (like you say the slagging/ banter is very common here, but seemed to be considered quite rude or offensive there).

I'm sure some of the people I met there thought I was a total weirdo with some of the things I came out with! There was definitely a few awkward moment when I put my foot in it.

But overall people were lovely, friendly and polite and kind. But I think it would be hard to adjust to the different sense of humour at first.

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You just got the wrong coast. East Coast Canadians are sarcastic, funny and take no shit. It's the West Coast with no sense of humour.

jeaux90 · 30/09/2022 17:52

I wouldn't go. I think Canada is getting quite authoritarian and it's completely lost its mind on womens rights. Or actually, what a woman even is!

robertpaulson · 30/09/2022 17:54

maddy68 · 30/09/2022 15:30

I live in a different country and I am appalled when I visit the UK. It's so run down and feels full of dispair. It's frankly shocking

Certainly not run down here.. perhaps you should visit nicer places

Eeksteek · 30/09/2022 18:21

It’s somewhere I’d look at living they don’t want me, though!

franticflip · 30/09/2022 18:22

@ChilliPB

Which city if you don't mind me asking? I'm desperately looking for something like this.

mackthepony · 30/09/2022 18:32

Yeah, Canada is shit.

Please stay away!

DuckBilledFattypus · 30/09/2022 18:37

You just got the wrong coast. East Coast Canadians are sarcastic, funny and take no shit. It's the West Coast with no sense of humour.

This.

ItsJustTheOneSwanActually · 30/09/2022 18:51

We emigrated from UK to Canada 16 years ago - initially to Vancouver, then after a couple of yrs work brought us to Calgary.

We've been very happy here. Overall, i think we have a much better lifestyle than we would in the UK. DH is a tradesman and earns a lot more money and is far more respected than in the UK.

We have a large (by UK standards) detached house, 2 cars and travel trailer (caravan). Banff is really busy, but that's where the tourists go in summer, not the locals.

I'd avoid Vancouver or Toronto unless you have a million pounds to buy a house. The cost of food here is much higher than the UK and rising.

The politics have been dealt with by PP Grin

Losing parents as they age has been really shit from afar, not going to lie.

Snow is fine - we have multi million dollar budgets to deal with it. And 300 days of sunshine a year is not to be sniffed at. We do miss the radio and the pubs though.

I'd encourage anyone to give it a go.

Choconut · 30/09/2022 19:02

DuckBilledFattypus · 30/09/2022 18:37

You just got the wrong coast. East Coast Canadians are sarcastic, funny and take no shit. It's the West Coast with no sense of humour.

This.

That might be true but having visited both it would be West every day for me, the West is just stunning.

sonsmum · 30/09/2022 19:12

Only move there is you are running TOWARDS it, rather that running AWAY from your current life. Massive decision to move countries! Think you'd need to visit if you haven't already!

Dotcheck · 30/09/2022 19:14

It's interesting that your family in in Alberta. It's overall a much more right wing provincial government, and in many ways Albertans are a lot more like Americans

@MangyInseam

Albertans are not the same as Americans. Ridiculous

catchthedog · 30/09/2022 19:20

we moved the other way from Canada (toronto) to the UK. wouldn't ever go back..

much better life here, from our salary, to almost 4 x the amount of holidays and generally lot more going on.