AIBU?
Moving Theatre Seats
Sorrythatsjustmybrain · 29/09/2022 22:38
Okay I'm prepared to be flamed but otherwise I'm going to be thinking about for the rest of time, so I need some opinions!
Went to the theatre the other day, and noticed the seats were really squashed together (not my specific AIBU but a good topic itself!).
I sat next to a lady and we were immediately touching. There were quite a few empty seats as it was not a well known show. The lady seemed friendly enough and I said if no one sat next to us on the other side, we'd move up to give the two couples more room. She agreed and laughed - all fine!
During the interval I realised that next to that couple were 4 empty seats, whereas on the other side of us all seats were full and again my DP was sat basically on top of the poor woman next to him. The lady went to the toilets and I asked her husband if he would move up a couple of seats so we could spread out and all have a bit more room. He point blank refused. I asked him why and he said "because I don't want to"... I explained that if they just moved up at least one seat it would mean his wife would also have more space so it would benefit them. He started shouting at me that he wasn't moving, so I said I'm not sure why you're so entitled about a seat and left him to it.
His wife then came back and also started shouting at me that if I wasn't happy I should move. I said I am happy, I just thought it would be nice for us all to spread out and it would benefit her. She then started physically elbowing me at which point I shouted at her to stop. The pair of them then both started laughing at me saying I should move and that they can't believe I even asked etc. The wife said her husband was tall so couldn't move up, but by that logic he should have been in the back row?! I also didn't understand why she had agreed we would move to then come back and shout because her husband told her I had asked them to move up one. I just asked them to please stop as it's embarrassing.
In the end the show came back on so they stopped talking about me (loud enough to make it obvious) but she kept elbowing me periodically through the rest. Afterwards I just said to my DP let's go because I really couldn't be arsed to argue more with the couple when all I'd done was ask them to move up one. I could see that they started a conversation with the man sat in front of them so now I'm wondering if it was me being the arsehole. There were a few people still sat in their seats through the interval but no one said anything.
AIBU in thinking they could have easily moved up and it wouldn't have caused anyone an issue?!
Am I being unreasonable?
AIBUYou have one vote. All votes are anonymous.
KatherineofGaunt · 29/09/2022 22:42
A bit frustrating to have seats so close together, perhaps, but YWBU to keep pushing the issue once the man had said no.
Why didn't you and your husband just move to two of the empty four seats yourselves?
SnarkyBag · 29/09/2022 22:45
KatherineofGaunt · 29/09/2022 22:42
A bit frustrating to have seats so close together, perhaps, but YWBU to keep pushing the issue once the man had said no.
Why didn't you and your husband just move to two of the empty four seats yourselves?
Agree with this
XelaM · 29/09/2022 22:49
Their behaviour was bad, but I don't understand why you didn't just move to the empty seats?
msbevvy · 29/09/2022 22:49
Maybe their view wouldn't have been so good if they had moved because of people sitting in the row in front.
Sorrythatsjustmybrain · 29/09/2022 22:51
KatherineofGaunt · 29/09/2022 22:42
A bit frustrating to have seats so close together, perhaps, but YWBU to keep pushing the issue once the man had said no.
Why didn't you and your husband just move to two of the empty four seats yourselves?
Okay it's a fair point, it just seemed easier for one person to shift up a seat than for us all to play musical chairs. After the shouting I didn't want to move past him as he was quite intimidating so I stayed put.
I didn't think I was pushing the issue - I said to them I didn't have a problem with the seats but just asked if we could make it easier. It's more the fact that they carried on shouting, laughing and elbowing me after we agreed to disagree!
LynetteScavo · 29/09/2022 22:52
I don't understand why you didn't move to the empty seats.
There seems to have been a lot of shouting? Did you elbow the woman back? 
SnarkyBag · 29/09/2022 22:53
What was your husband doing whilst this intimidating, angry man was shouting at his wife?
Sorrythatsjustmybrain · 29/09/2022 22:54
msbevvy · 29/09/2022 22:49
Maybe their view wouldn't have been so good if they had moved because of people sitting in the row in front.
That's why his wife said about him not moving - apparently he was tall so had to sit there which I didn't understand. We were in the middle and if he had moved up 2 seats there was no one sitting in front of the new seat.
eyeteevee · 29/09/2022 22:55
YABU to try and organise everyone else to suit your seating preference.
Kite22 · 29/09/2022 22:58
YABVVVU
If you aren't comfortable, and there are spare seats, then you move. You don't try and rearrange other people. That's just bizarre.
Can't believe you started a shouting match in the theatre 
HundredMilesAnHour · 29/09/2022 22:59
You sound like a nightmare OP. Trying to boss around strangers just to suit yourself. Why couldn't you just take the hint and let it drop?
msbevvy · 29/09/2022 23:00
My DH is tall and worries about blocking the view of people behind him. Maybe this man was worried about that.
I would be fed up if I had a good view of the stage and then came back after the interval to find a tall person had moved in front of me.
ivegotarms · 29/09/2022 23:02
The tall man was obviously concerned about blocking the view of people behind him. It doesn't make any difference whether the seats in front were empty.
In this instance I would say that you are being unreasonable and actually quite rude trying to insist the other people move to make you more comfortable when it would have been just as easy for you to move since they were or empty seats and only two of you anyway...
The woman shouting back at you you isn't much better though. It isn't the way we behave at the theatre.
NurseInTraining · 29/09/2022 23:04
Seems a bit silly of them not to spread out but I would just assume that maybe they didn't really understand what you were asking or didn't realise that it would be for their benefit too. Sometimes people don't think things through and maybe they had other things going on at the time.
The people on the other side seemed to get it so I don't think you were being really unreasonable.
Just put it down to one of those things.
Sorrythatsjustmybrain · 29/09/2022 23:08
I appreciate people's views but don't think it was bossy to simply ask if someone minded moving up. Nor was I trying to be audience logistics manager! I thought it would actually benefit his wife because she was sat very close to me, and also the couple sat on the other side of us would benefit too. I didn't start the shouting just by asking someone a question! I also continually asked them to please stop so I'm not sure how that equates to being bossy or selfish. As I said I'm prepared for the opinions but surely I'm okay to ask a simple question and not be shouted at or elbowed in response?!
tellmewhyyyyyy · 29/09/2022 23:09
"I asked him why and he said "because I don't want to"... I explained that if they just moved up at least one seat it would mean his wife would also have more space so it would benefit them."
Ok. He gave you a boundary and you rode all over it. Then you called him names. Does that help you at all to understand why you experienced such hostility?
tellmewhyyyyyy · 29/09/2022 23:10
Sorrythatsjustmybrain · 29/09/2022 23:08
I appreciate people's views but don't think it was bossy to simply ask if someone minded moving up. Nor was I trying to be audience logistics manager! I thought it would actually benefit his wife because she was sat very close to me, and also the couple sat on the other side of us would benefit too. I didn't start the shouting just by asking someone a question! I also continually asked them to please stop so I'm not sure how that equates to being bossy or selfish. As I said I'm prepared for the opinions but surely I'm okay to ask a simple question and not be shouted at or elbowed in response?!
You asked a simple question. You were told no. He didn't want to move up. Then you started demanding more answers.
Their behaviour sounds rude and uncalled for but my goodness you were tone deaf. He doesn't owe you anything, no explanation, nothing.
washingbasketqueen · 29/09/2022 23:12
If there was 4 free seats and me and my dh I'd have moved there. I wouldn't expect other people to move. I might've suggested it to the person next to me but if they didn't want to I'd have done my own thing.
Sorrythatsjustmybrain · 29/09/2022 23:12
tellmewhyyyyyy · 29/09/2022 23:09
"I asked him why and he said "because I don't want to"... I explained that if they just moved up at least one seat it would mean his wife would also have more space so it would benefit them."
Ok. He gave you a boundary and you rode all over it. Then you called him names. Does that help you at all to understand why you experienced such hostility?
So you think it's okay to be shouted at and elbowed for explaining to someone why it might be a good idea for the benefit of 6 other people including his own wife? Okay he didn't agree with me but there was no need for the rest of it!
ArmWrestlingWithChasNDave · 29/09/2022 23:13
You sound batshit. I hope your weird behaviour didn't ruin their night.
tellmewhyyyyyy · 29/09/2022 23:13
Sorrythatsjustmybrain · 29/09/2022 23:12
So you think it's okay to be shouted at and elbowed for explaining to someone why it might be a good idea for the benefit of 6 other people including his own wife? Okay he didn't agree with me but there was no need for the rest of it!
tellmewhyyyyyy · 29/09/2022 23:09
"I asked him why and he said "because I don't want to"... I explained that if they just moved up at least one seat it would mean his wife would also have more space so it would benefit them."
Ok. He gave you a boundary and you rode all over it. Then you called him names. Does that help you at all to understand why you experienced such hostility?
Don't straw man me, it's plain tiresome.
AlmostAJillSandwich · 29/09/2022 23:13
I pick dead centre when booking or get there early to get as central in the row as i can at none specific seating movies etc, because i don't like not having a straight on view. 2 seats along can make a quite noticeable difference, so if i was happy with the view i had, i wouldn't want to move. I wouldn't be rude about it or shout/elbow etc if someone asked me to move to fit their party in all together or to leave a gap seat, but i wouldn't say anything more than "sorry, no, i want this seat for the view".
After his initial "no" you were rude to pass further comment to argue your point, however politely worded. If you weren't happy and there were seats to move to, you should have just moved.
tellmewhyyyyyy · 29/09/2022 23:14
ArmWrestlingWithChasNDave · 29/09/2022 23:13
You sound batshit. I hope your weird behaviour didn't ruin their night.
Agree.
The OP also sounds like a trolling instigator looking for a fight just like in the imaginary story in the op.
I'm out.
Kite22 · 29/09/2022 23:14
I appreciate people's views but don't think it was bossy to simply ask if someone minded moving up
Well, lucky you asked the internet if they agreed with you.
At present 85% think you were being unreasonable.
You've asked.
People have overwhelming told you you are.
Then you've said "I don't think I was".
Not sure why you asked then.
Sounds similar attitude to the fat the man answered your question, and then rather than accepting it, you then went on at him to try to explain why you were right and he was wrong 
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