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AIBU?

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Original poster

To have been annoyed at bloke in sports shop for telling off my son?

238 replies

NoJokeBoak · 25/09/2022 22:23

Our sports shop has a gaming section now (makes no sense to me either!) separate to Sports shop apparently but no real separation physically.

I was stood looking at games and a worker approached and said to DS (who is 10) "Don't do that, you can't just leave things here, this is a separate part of the shop. You can't dump things here. That's not nice!"

It was a really condescending tone, really 'super nannyish'

I asked what was happening and he said DS had put a Nike bag on a hook with gaming items on and it didn't belong there.

I asked him to direct any issues to me and I will be the one to tell my son off, not him, he had no right to.

He huffed and walked off. I asked DS what happened and why did he have a Nike bag and why did he hang it up in the games section.

He said he didn't bring the bag over, it was hung up there already and it got knocked off by a lady going passed with a buggy, so he was just putting it back rather than leaving it on the floor.

On hearing that he was just trying to be helpful I went back to the worker who was laughing with his mate and calling me a Karen!! I explained to him that DS hadn't brought the bag into his section, he was simply picking it up off the floor after it had gotten knocked off from there.

He just kept saying its a different section and the bag didn't belong there.

I just left as he wasn't listening to me at all and I was annoyed at being called a Karen for standing up for my son.

WIBU to email HO, I got his name but does that actually make me a Karen if I complain 😐

OP posts:
Soubriquet · 26/09/2022 10:07

Notanotherwindow · 26/09/2022 10:05

Oh bullshit was he picking it up. I'd believe the adult who saw him leave it there over the 10 year old trying to get out of trouble. If it was there before, the staff would have moved it as they were clearly watching the store to have seen the child put it there.

Even if he lied, the worker still had no right to have a go.

Part of working in a shop, is tidying up after the customers.

Notanotherwindow · 26/09/2022 10:10

Uh, yeah he did. Their job isn't to run round clearing up after peoples badly behaved, unsupervised children. They aren't childminders.

Picking up after your kid is YOUR job.

Ein · 26/09/2022 10:21

Complain to head office. The guy clearly had zero respect for women and children and sounds like a bit of a bully. Maybe if he’s reprimanded by his boss he’ll think about his behaviour.

I wonder if sports shops are more like this? The one near me has a manager who’s a total ass, he had a real go at me for refusing to give him my mobile number when I was buying a pair of shoes “the computer needs it” wtf. He also bullies his teenage staff. Unfortunately that manager owns the store so I don’t have anyone to complain to, sigh.

Somethingsnappy · 26/09/2022 10:24

Username91 · 26/09/2022 07:41

So Karen is sexist and offensive but using a vulgar word for a woman’s genitals to insult somebody with is fine and has none of the same connotations? Makes total sense that.

Show quote history

I don't think they are the same/comparable really. Both men and women can and do get called cunts, and also there are equivalent insults, based on men's genitalia, that again, both men and women get called. None of those insults are making sexist and ageist generalisations about the insultee, so to speak.

Caroffee · 26/09/2022 10:40

It's unacceptable to call somebody a 'Karen' so I would complain to HO, yes. The worker's attitude sounds all wrong.

However, I don't feel overall that only parents cam reprimand children if they are very clearly doing something wrong (which in your son's case, they were not).

nomoreflyingfucks · 26/09/2022 10:54

So odd. So someone left a random bag on a hook, a person knocked the bag off the hook, and op's son thought he was being helpful in returning the bag to the hook?
Poor kid he won't bother being helpful again. It's really crap being ticked off when he's trying to be helpful.

And who did the bag belong too? I hope there was proper signage to say "Do Not Use The Hooks". And the random bag-hooker gets their due.

VioletInsolence · 26/09/2022 10:55

I despise people who keep repeating the same thing without listening when you’re trying to explain something to them. I think they must be robots and something’s gone wrong with their programming.

of course you should complain!

Caroffee · 26/09/2022 10:59

latetothefisting · 26/09/2022 09:01

Having worked in retail, moving stuff from where customers have left it in the wrong place is a standard part of the job and not something a staff member should be telling a customer off for!

I would hazard a guess that he wouldn't have told your ds off if he was a big rugby playing 18 year old!
Plus then moaning about you within earshot is incredibly bad customer service- again it was normal to have an eye roll about customers but in private, not in front of them/other customers!

This.

I am an adult and I sometimes 'dump' items I have changed my mind about in different sections. I wouldn't expect an arrogant shopworker to tell me off for doing this.

RufusthefIoraImissingreindeer · 26/09/2022 11:01

Brideandpredjudice · 26/09/2022 07:44

YABU. Your son is probably lying.

Oh for goodness sake

Some very unpleasant posts on this thread

OP I'm sorry your son got told off when he was only trying to be helpful. I agree with other posters who say that if the shop assistant wouldn't say anything to an
Adult they shouldn't do the same for a child. I wouldn't complain about that part and I wouldn't have gone back to correct him

I would complain at the name calling. Very unprofessional

ThatGirlInACountrySong · 26/09/2022 11:03

No @Mollysocks

I'm not implying anything I'm saying op needs to supervise closer as she had no clue about the bag until she questioned the kid after the event

If she had been watching him she would know!!!

ThatGirlInACountrySong · 26/09/2022 11:04

Would love to hear the staffs version of events....2 sides to each story and we only have a carefully crafted one here..

SavoirFlair · 26/09/2022 11:11

ThatGirlInACountrySong · 26/09/2022 11:04

Would love to hear the staffs version of events....2 sides to each story and we only have a carefully crafted one here..

Well said. The rush to victimhood about something so slight is deeply distasteful at best …

RufusthefIoraImissingreindeer · 26/09/2022 11:41

SavoirFlair · 26/09/2022 11:11

Well said. The rush to victimhood about something so slight is deeply distasteful at best …

Show quote history

Be a waste of time

3 sides to a story, mine , yours and the truth

If posters are happy to think that the child is lying to get out of trouble then then member of staff is obviously capable of doing the same

allof · 26/09/2022 11:42

He was in the right in telling your son off when he thought he had dumped a bag in a different section, though that mistake would have been cleared up. However, the 'Karen' name calling was completely unprofessional, and misogynistic, and you should make a complaint.

Mollysocks · 26/09/2022 11:59

Notanotherwindow · 26/09/2022 10:05

Oh bullshit was he picking it up. I'd believe the adult who saw him leave it there over the 10 year old trying to get out of trouble. If it was there before, the staff would have moved it as they were clearly watching the store to have seen the child put it there.

I hope you’ll never be on a jury then.

Assumptions aren’t facts.

AisforApplePie · 26/09/2022 12:15

MissMaple82 · 26/09/2022 09:35

Clearly you've never worked in retail with that attitude! I worked in clarks for many years, we absolutely did have the right to tell people who thought it was acceptable to come in eating pasties and sausage rolls then fingerings the shoes, and also kids who used the displays as a play area. Managers and bosses would also do the same. Retail staff are not there to tidy up and bow down to ignorant arseholes like yourself!

Show quote history

I mentioned earlier to at I had career in retail from the Saturday morning girl to becoming a manager years later. And I wouldn’t have had nor accepted this workers attitude. There are ways of talking to customers, the gentleman in the OPs example is not the right way at all. He sounds immature and his customer service sounds poor, even before he started making fun of the OP. If he were my member of staff I’d be having a chat with him and discussing some extra training.

AisforApplePie · 26/09/2022 12:16

allof · 26/09/2022 11:42

He was in the right in telling your son off when he thought he had dumped a bag in a different section, though that mistake would have been cleared up. However, the 'Karen' name calling was completely unprofessional, and misogynistic, and you should make a complaint.

Telling him off? No, sorry, but telling him off isn’t acceptable. As I have said previously, there are ways of doing this and this isn’t it. It isn’t okay to tell off a customer for putting a bag in the wrong place, no matter the customers age.

whatsup00 · 26/09/2022 12:18

People are being silly. Your son was trying to be helpful. The shop assistant sounds horrible. I wouldn't complain though personally. I would just deal with it in the shop then forget about it. That's just what I would do. What you do - that's up to you.

isthismylifenow · 26/09/2022 12:25

Surely you must have more important things to fill your day with rather than over thinking this and going out of your way to complain.

And then it shows your 10 year old that no matter what life thing happens, you need to lodge some complaint about it.

Shit happens in life. Many people would brush this off as ah oh well he is having a bad day.... and then move on with life.

PuppyMonkey · 26/09/2022 12:29

Couldn’t the shop worker just move the bag back to the correct rail himself? I dunno, that’s what I’d have done if I worked there but maybe I’m a bit out of touch.Grin

ThatGirlInACountrySong · 26/09/2022 12:31

PuppyMonkey · 26/09/2022 12:29

Couldn’t the shop worker just move the bag back to the correct rail himself? I dunno, that’s what I’d have done if I worked there but maybe I’m a bit out of touch.Grin

You'd then have an irate parent on here moaning that a 'shop worker' came near their precious kid and took away a bag he ( may or may not have) been looking at!!

allof · 26/09/2022 12:31

Telling him off? No, sorry, but telling him off isn’t acceptable. As I have said previously, there are ways of doing this and this isn’t it. It isn’t okay to tell off a customer for putting a bag in the wrong place, no matter the customers age.

I disagree. It wasn't a harsh telling off by any means.

Though I've never worked in retail as you have. The 'Karen' comments are the main concern I think.

SirChenjins · 26/09/2022 12:32

isthismylifenow · 26/09/2022 12:25

Surely you must have more important things to fill your day with rather than over thinking this and going out of your way to complain.

And then it shows your 10 year old that no matter what life thing happens, you need to lodge some complaint about it.

Shit happens in life. Many people would brush this off as ah oh well he is having a bad day.... and then move on with life.

Hardly going out of her way - a quick email, will take her about the same time it took you to write that post.

candycaneframe · 26/09/2022 12:33

isthismylifenow · 26/09/2022 12:25

Surely you must have more important things to fill your day with rather than over thinking this and going out of your way to complain.

And then it shows your 10 year old that no matter what life thing happens, you need to lodge some complaint about it.

Shit happens in life. Many people would brush this off as ah oh well he is having a bad day.... and then move on with life.

Exactly this, if anything OP firing off an email complaint only proves the term this lad called you.

gatehouseoffleet · 26/09/2022 12:38

00100001 · 25/09/2022 22:31

YABU.

The worker was allowed to tell your son not to do something he felt was wrong.

Yes he is, but when he it is explained to him that he was wrong, he should have apologised. I would have insisted on speaking to a manager about the Karen remark too - sexist, ageist twerp.

Life is not fair and he has many more challenges to learn to live with than an uppity shop assistant yes life is probably too short to formally complain in this case. On the one hand the staff can be very arrogant young men, but on the other hand very badly paid. The management will be no better. So I doubt it will get you anywhere. Just don't shop there in future.

Just read on the BBC website that the male equivalent is a Ken the BBC is wrong, there is no male equivalent