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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be so glad my family aren't doing presents for adults for xmas this year?

103 replies

Noodge · 25/09/2022 06:58

Some of my friends I have mentioned it to think we're real killjoys, missing out etc and I am beginning to wonder if they're right and perhaps xmas may feel a bit 'flat' without gifts?

There is nobody under 20 in our family now.

We've decided to not buy one another anything, cards only.

I am so relieved. Reasons including, none of us bloody need anything and if we did, we'd just go and buy it!

We all get stressed out trying to buy the 'perfect' present for one another. We often buy piles and piles of them for each person!

It takes up time and energy.

To be fair to us, we don't buy 'tat' and most things are well received and get used but still, It's still stuff we don't particularly need, spending money we don't need to, time we're better spending doing other things.

Does anyone else do this, I am sure I've seen it mentioned on previous threads.
I am wondering if perhaps I should suggest that instead of 'no presents' It's 'only edible ones (food/booze)? Or only one present under £20?

OP posts:
BarbaraofSeville · 20/12/2022 18:05

Lelophants · 20/12/2022 17:43

I’d personally find it a bit depressing! I like to spend lots of time thinking of special things to get someone - often things they would never normally buy themselves.

Because most of the time they don't want the thing, however pleased and grateful they sound when you give it to them.

speakout · 20/12/2022 18:12

Lelophants · 20/12/2022 17:43

I’d personally find it a bit depressing! I like to spend lots of time thinking of special things to get someone - often things they would never normally buy themselves.

I agree.
Gifts in our family are thoughtful, rather than expensive.
They show that we listen to each other, take time to know us well.
Gifts are always well chosen, and usually inexpensive

Pericombobulations · 20/12/2022 19:50

I made my siblings agree to this, I love buying thoughtful presents, but had to listen to my brothers comment how upset my face was over their selected present which apparently was the object that year.

I've been given a paper shredder, when everyone else had nice thoughtful gifts. A plastic hairslide when others got expensive gifts. etc.

I was told they didnt know what to buy, so was asked to set up a Amazon wish list of cheap items. My brothers refused to use it as "They didnt like anything on the list"

The final straw (and it is shocking it took this long) was when one brother was in a supermarket and asked which wine my DH and I would like. I told him, niether of us drink wine and a box of chocolates or biscuits would be much more appreciated. Come Christmas day and yes we got a bottle of wine. I took the hint that they werent interested in my likes and bought purely to upset me.

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