I don't want my daughter having a tablet

[lookinguponhim]

DD is 4.

She is impeccably well behaved (pure luck), and I just love listening to her playing :) She doesn't constantly bug me to engage with her playing etc. she will happily sit and play with Lego, babies, teddies, dolls house, drawing, etc etc

MIL is upset with me because I don't want her having a tablet.

I'm not against them! But DD doesn't need one? She isn't a constant 'I'm bored' type and I've never felt at a loss with regards to what to do for a quick 10 mins peace and quiet. She just plays

MIL says I am against her all the time, and I should let her have one. She says I'm pushing her out and won't let her buy this for DD, and that she needs one

AIBU to refuse and put my foot down here?

My 8 year old DS is profoundly autistic. I'd give anything for him to have liked his tablet at age 4! Or even now. But he doesn't have the mental capacity to operate one, I really wish he would

So I'm not against them particularly, but I just don't see the point

She watched a few programmes on telly but no need for an actual tablet

She needs to respect your decision.
Do not give in to her wishes. I can't even understand her reasoning....🤔

You're the parent, you choose. Mil needs to back off.

Having seen the impact of giving children a tablet or mobile phone first hand ( and I did this in Year 7) I’d say in hindsight that all screens and phones should be banned until 18 like cigarettes and alcohol.

it sounds extreme and I completely get that a lot of the secondary school work now happens on a chrome book ( which is fine if configured for school use only) but I think the addiction to screens and negatives in terms of where they lead and long term damage they cause outweighs the benefits.

At 4 years old I’m shocked to be honest you are even having to debate this topic. Trust your instincts here - you already know it’s not right for your child. You don’t need mumsnet to tell you. Your MIL is absolutely mad.

YANBU, as pretty much everyone has said.

My eldest is 4. We have an old tablet that DH got for free a few years ago (long story). The only time it ever gets used is not DD during car journeys that are longer than say 45 mins or so. Which is usually only a few times a year for holidays. She asks for it for travel but never at any other time, she knows she wouldn't be given it. I find it useful for in the car especially for the past year since we had DC2 so I cant sit in the back with her anymore. However absolutely no way would I let her have her own device and/or use it more regularly. Actually I think we took it to a hospital appointment recently too - I had to talk about her to the consultant and it was sensitive topic and I didn't want her listening really so got her to colour on the tablet to divert her attention. So in limited circumstances I'm glad to have the option but they are rare.

@BloodAndFire yes she was 1 when she got it.

@TooMuchToDoTooLittleInclination she's not overly interested and much prefers playing. My 11 year old was more interested in his when he was 2, now he likes to chill out with it at the weekend if he's not got plans. Not obsessed with it at all.

@Sarahcoggles it was a gift.

Don't let her bully you. It's your child and your decision.

I don't join anti MiL threads, but really, stop listening to the opinions of others on your parenting decisions. Especially opinions from people with a vested interest of this sort. She had her turn. Now it's yours. And my children are all adults, too.

I agree with you. I wouldn't let her either.

Stand firm. She's your daughter and you call the shots.

I have 4 year old twins and they don't have tablets. I would feel exactly the same as you.