Diana and Charles Questions

[AdoraLovesCake]

So this is not a AIBU but it's an ATBU for are THEY being unreasonable.

I have seen a lot of you tube shorts marking the 25 year death of Lady Diana Spencer/the princess. They say she was a devoted mum and participated in the boys' school events, gave them macdonald's ect. Was a lovely, normal mum. I don't dispute that. Even though she died just before I was born so i hardly know anything about her, i think she is amazing and did not deserve to die. That brings me on to how some people said she wrote in her diary that she thought Charles was planning to kill her (staging an accident) so he could marry Camilla and that she knew something was wrong with the brakes in her car. For any of you who don't know, she died in a car accident in Paris on August 31rd 1997.

She was the people's princess and adored by all, she was one of us as her children went to public schools, she dressed casual. ect.

I also have some questions:

• Where was Diana buried, I know she had a state funeral thing?
• Did Diana see her kids much after the divorce?
• If Diana was alive now, what would her position be?
• Charles did not mention Diana in his becoming king speech - he could have said 'And the boys' mother who taught them so much' or something - do you think he should have?

YABU: They are being unreasonable and Charles did not order Diana's murder
YANBU: They are not being unreasonable and Charles did order Diana's murder

I’d say it’s more unusual that they got to the ages they did with grandparents! My Dad’s parents were dead before I was born (he was 33 so not an old father by any means). My DSD has no grandparents on my DHs side and she’s only 7 - his Mum died when he was a child and his Dad a few years ago. On the other hand, my maternal grandfather didn’t die until I was 27 and my maternal grandmother is still hanging in there at 92! I would imagine W and H would say they are very lucky to have had the Queen and Prince Philip live as long as they did! And for King Charles to have both parents until he was 72 (?) is amazing! Again, my Dad had no parents left by 31 and my DH by 34. To have your Mum and Dad into your seventies would be wonderful!

I agree. I lost my maternal G'Mother at 14, Grandad at 15, paternal Grandfather also when I was 15 and grandmother in my mid-twenties which I thought was pretty good going! They were all in their 70s. A lot of people lose parents in their 30s and 40s, let alone Grandparents.

Very true. I lost my paternal grandmother at 3 years old, all the others had died long before I was born. (My DM was orphaned at 10.) I used to envy kids with grandparents they could visit when I was a child.

She was clearly a fragile person with poor MH. She courted the media before her death and it turned into a circus. She died because of that circus, she wasn’t murdered. The whole “normal” mum thing was again a media savvy portrayal of a very wealthy family, which couldn’t be further away from normal. He didn’t mention her in his speech because it wasn’t about Diana and the world would have clung onto it.

she didn’t deserve to die and I don’t doubt did a lot of good but she wasn’t a saint and wasn’t loved by everyone.

Your last remark has me... What is one of us?

On the subject of Diana not being a saint, I was reading a book review about Raine Spencer in The Sunday Times. Apparently Diana pushed her step-mother down the stairs at one point when she was already married to Charles. That is not normal behaviour, is it?

Do you really think KC3 ordered a hit on the ex wife?? Or the Queen did? Really? Do some homework before regurgating all this shit up🙄🙄🙄

I think I was very unusual in losing my last grandparent when I was 45. She was three months off her 100th birthday. The others died when I was mid-teens, 19 and 26. I know I'm extremely unusual in having both parents alive now - I'm 61 and they're in their very late 80s.

My children are 30 and 28. They have two grandparents living (my parents) and they never knew the other two, who died before they were born.

Charles has had both his parents and grandmother in his life a lot longer than most people.

I think they’re quite unusual.

in our circle of friends - mostly mid forties to early fifties - DH is the only one who has grandparents left. He’s the only one that had great-grandparents alive until he was at high school as well. MIL & FIL were young when he was born, and his Granny was young when FIL born so that’s why.
His Granny has outlived her husband, all her siblings, three of her children and one of her grandchildren which must be very very hard for her.

Yes it’s odd isn’t it. And not knowing she had a brother. His eulogy is so well known. Strange to be interested enough to come on here but not have bothered to find anything out other than one or two things that aren’t true!

I must admit I thought she only had the brother never realised Diana was one of four.

Didn't know about her pushing her step-mum down the stairs.

She must have felt let down by her family encouraging the wedding in the first place. If he hadn't been heir to the thrown they'd have told them to slow down.

See in my circle of friends everyone but me has both parents and at least one grandparent (friends from mid-30’s to mid-40’s). Still, it’s quite daunting to know your parent is next to go and the Princes only have one left who’s not terribly young and (sorry Your Highness) doesn’t exactly look the picture of health.

I guess it depends how old people were when they became parents and grandparents ,when I was born my parents were both 31 ,and all my grandparents were in their early 60,s so me losing them all between my early to late 20,s ,wouldn't be unusual
But I know people who have become grandparents in their late 30,s early 40,s! You would statiscally expect them to live well into their Grandchildren, s adult lives

One of her sisters was C3s ex. Her grandmother was lady in waiting to Queen mum who was instrumental in setting up the marriage. The Spencers and the royals were well known to one another. The other sister married to a privare secretary of the Queen. I find it absolutely astonishing that Diana had no idea what marrying into that family could be like and don't believe it. She appears to have had no sense of irony at all and spent a lot of time tantrumming because the world refused to conform to her demands. At the time of her Dodi romance she was campaigning against land mines. Dodi's uncle was one of the most prolific arms dealers around. Very careless and self-centred woman.

I think Diana was just young, nieve and flattered. Possibly craving an nuclear family life.
She was just 19 getting married. In some countries / states that's barely the age of concent.

True - my StepMIL was a great grandma at 54 😱 my mum was 27 when she had me and in the 80’s that was considered an ‘older woman’ pregnancy!

I honestly think that the late Queen Mother interfered in that and she was also the reason why primogeniture wasn't changed before William's birth

Indeed - a friend of mine is a historian with a special interest in monarchy and society, and there is a certain school of thought that the Queen Mother was actually one of the greatest forces in preventing the modernisation of the monarchy, which the likes of Philip and Mountbatten were pushing for.

As she was never meant to be Queen - her husband was 'the spare', after all, and nobody saw the abdication crisis coming in time - Bertie was allowed to marry a little 'below his class'.

Apparently, the QM was intensely aware of the fact that many of the RF saw her as a bit 'non-U' (in spite of the fact that she was a blue-blood aristo from a very old Scottish family) and was highly defensive as a result, preserving and intensifying customs and traditions that nobody else really cared about (or, if they did care, saw that they had the potential to cause real damage).

The whole arranged marriage thing was a disaster: Charles should have been allowed to marry Camilla from the get-go and Diana would have done the usual Sloaney posh-girl thing of playing about in a pretend job for a few years, then getting hitched to some equally posh aristo hedge-fund manager type whom she would have met at some Season thing.

Everybody would have been so much happier.

Definitely Charles should have been allowed to marry Camilla to start with instead he was fired half way round the world for months.
Communication isn't what it is now, so she looked elsewhere.

I do feel for Charles if he'd been allowed to marry her in the first place so much dislike for him just wouldn't be there.

William and HMQ have given Camilla their blessing and so should the rest of us.

One of her sisters was C3s ex. Her grandmother was lady in waiting to Queen mum who was instrumental in setting up the marriage.

The QM was also allegedly highly unsympathetic to Diana’s unhappiness after the marriage and told her she basically had to suck it up. Not a very nice woman.

I'm not sure he was interested in marrying her then.

I do think that a lot of people are taking The Crown as gospel. AFAIK, Camilla preferred Andrew P-B after Charles dithered about proposing; Camilla was certainly not Charles’ only girlfriend; Diana’s grandmother wrote to her to discourage her from marrying Charles because of their lack of common interests; Charles proposed to a Mountbatten not long before Diana but was turned down - The Crown is very plausible but it just doesn’t paint an accurate picture.

I think he fancied Camilla but he knew the RF wouldn't approve. He didn't make his feeling clear before the RF had him sent away with the RN to cool things between them.

Yea and what the book obviously failed to mention was that she and Raine reconciled in later life and went out to lunch together reasonably regularly towards the end of Diana’s life.

i saw a fascinating documentary on netflix on diana, she sounded like a right lunatic.
i believe she went to a now defunct specialist school.
of course charles also didnt have a normal upbringing.

oh i think i am wrong about the school,
it became a Special school afterwards.
nevertheless she did not do well, was a particularly low achiever before marrying.