Miss, Mrs, Ms or Mx?

[Cherchezlaspice]

Which are you? I’m a Ms, and have been since I was about 8 years old. I didn’t change my title (or my name) when I got married and this caused some consternation amongst some of the older members of my family.

This made me realise that most women I know (married or unmarried) use Ms. I don’t think I’ve come across anyone under the age of about 50 who uses ‘Miss’ or ‘Mrs’. And I’ve never encountered a ‘Mx’. I do have a fairly specific demographic bubble, though.

So, I’m curious, which are you/do you use?

So it’s a class thing? We in the uneducated peasantry use miss and mrs?

Could be a shout though. Not many folk go into further education here, nothing here for them if they do so no option but to leave friends and family and set up life elsewhere. Most of us who have experienced inequality at my end of the social scale have on the basis of affluent/not affluent not man/woman.

I'm Mrs (50s) and most women I know are Mrs / Miss. I'm struggling to think of anyone who is a Ms including much younger work colleagues.

Only use Dr if you have actually earnt it, being educated is nothing to do with class and more so to do with individual effort and achievement

I am Miss Maiden Name. I am in sick

Do you live in the 1920s?

It's something not to have experienced Mx. but to never have met either Ms or a woman who keeps her own name is bizarre ....???

I'm Mrs but my married name is only one letter different to my maiden name, also can't remember anyone using Mrs MarriedName recently though.

Currently on holiday in Southern US and keep being called Miss FirstName and it's kinda lovely.

I’ve never used Dr. I was miss till I was 19 then I got married and changed to Mrs. being educated is everything to do with class. It’s only those on the affluent side of the scale write it off as individual effort and achievement. 5 out out 8 villages have lost their primary schools. Kids bused into town or another village for school. Miss the bus? Day off school. After school club? Forget it. One or no car families can’t get their kids home. What’s the point in going into a degree if there’s no degree level jobs apart from medicine within a 30 mile radius? Get your degree and a fucktonne of debt to come back and drive buses or go on the boats like my arsehole husband did? Makes no sense.

That’s so interesting.

I’m in rural midlands and I’m in my 30s. Everyone here uses Miss when unmarried and Mrs when married (strangely I don’t know too many divorced people). I’m the odd one out using Ms because I didn’t take my husbands last name. Strangely enough most people here take their husbands last name upon marriage as well whereas my ‘city friends’ are more of a mixed bag and not everyone takes their husbands last name

Possibly more akin to the 70s or 80s lifestyle up here. Like I said I do know a couple of ms but they’re divorced. Other Scottish posters have said the same thing on this thread. No I don’t know folk who keep their names when married, it’s seen as a sort of celebrity thing not something normal folk do. A bit kardashianesque.

I'm a Ms. It was a conscious choice when I was younger too (maybe not 8 though!). I wouldn't assume on meeting a Ms that they are divorced, I'd just assume that's their personal choice. That said, I don't think I have ever used a title in recent memory so I haven't a clue what others use - it's only asked of me when filling in forms!

it’s seen as a sort of celebrity thing not something normal folk do. A bit kardashianesque.

Tell me you're white without telling me you're white. A huge portion of the world don't take husbands names when they get married. In Scotland and elsewhere.

Also the 70's was 60 years ago. Go out and meet some new people.

Im really sad to hear your attitude against higher education. Yes rural areas have their struggles but the lack of aspiration is something that really strikes me. I’m not from the UK but live in rural Midlands and you’ll be surprised how many jobs out here requires a degree. Often they struggle to recruit more skilled/ experienced jobs here. Engineering jobs (esp management) requires a degree, teaching, finance/ accounting, as you mentioned a lot of the medical science fields (doctor, nurses, physio, radiologists etc…), HR etc…

I'm Ms or (preferably) Dr. Absolutely loathe being addressed as Miss or Mrs. Mid thirties, was adamant when I married 12 years ago that I would never change my name, still feel the same way (and still married to the same husband!). Don't have the same surname as my children and don't find that at all problematic.

a lot of those who don't take husbands name are white. A lot who do are non white. So wtf is your point?
are you aware that not all Scottish people are white?

I use Ms if I absolutely have to give a title, but I don't see why we need them at all.

I'm saying that if you don't know a SINGLE person who isn't a celebrity who hasn't taken their husbands name, your circle isn't very diverse.

Used Mrs for a bit after I got married and then started using Ms. It's hard to articulate why I didn't like Mrs- at first it felt like a novelty after getting married and then it started making me annoyed whenever I used it, like I was announcing that I was legally attached to a man. Meanwhile husband had to make no such change. I don't care or judge what other people choose for their names, it just wasn't right for me.

I also regretted changing my surname. My original surname is uncommon and almost identical to a pop culture character with a few very annoying catchphrases. I used to have people doing the catchphrases whenever I introduced myself, my name even caused people to chuckle in the bank etc. It made me really hate my name and I was very keen to change it to my husband's very common surname.

Now the pop culture reference is less of a craze, hardly anyone makes the connection any more and I really wish I hadn't changed it. My original name has a really nice meaning and feels like my identity, I never really settled into my new one. I'm planning to change it back.

I’m married but use me own name with either ‘miss’ or ‘Dr’ depending on the forum.

I can’t fathom people who STILL think ‘ms’ means divorced, businesses and government bodies have been sending me form letters addressed to ‘Ms Trip’ as the default for years. Continuing to make this assumption is just being deliberately obtuse.

I'm a care leaver who went to uni of my own accord and achieved a stem degree and now a business and computing masters with the look to pursue a doctorate. Education is everything to do with effort, yes class can unfortunately access people better universities however, anyone with the right grades can access university, I got into university through an access course provided by a fairly local university! I am not only autistic but have suffered with bpd and severe asthma since young childhood, please don't try to use poverty as a bloody excuse you are embarrassing the left. There are many degree level jobs, since graduating recently myself and all of my university friends (all of whom over 23 and accessed widening participation) have gained jobs in the region on 30-40k and additional training etc., My sister who only has college level 3's and a TBI is an assistant manager of a care facility and on a training wage of 25k. As to your missing the bus bs comments, I had to take 2/3 buses to my school daily and the journey would take well over an hour with my school starting at 8.20 in Lincolnshire, also if missed the bus had to walk up and down a hill to get there and had to walk at least half back as I had no other transport! I am very sorry you feel that a degree is a quote 'fucktonne of debt' however it is literally a higher tax on earnings for those that want to break the wage barrier and anyone who thinks differently does not know where the wage barrier is frankly.

I have used Ms since I was 14 regardless of my marital status.

People saying it means divorced: IT DOESN’T.

I am in my early 60s and most of my friends and work colleagues use Ms, and have not changed their names on marriage . Most female teachers in my DC’s S London schools were Ms, too.

Objected to a title intended to denote marital status (when Mr doesn’t) since I was a young teenager.

I’ve used Ms since I became an adult.

I'm Mrs, 35. I like it and would stick with it even if not married as I prefer the sound to Ms and it feels like part of my name now. I think it's good that people can choose.

That's interesting. I'm in Ireland. Titles are rarely used, ever. The kids' schools I suppose will occasionally address me using Mrs.

I use Ms where required. I don't know anyone who doesn't, regardless of marital status. Some older women still use Mrs but that's it. In a work context I've never seen Mrs used, whereas I do note in the UK it's more common eg Mrs May when she was PM

It really must! I've never seen Miss used, ever, here, bar when my Grandma might address cards to me as a small girl.

@PurpleMarie

That's an unnecessarily horrible reply to @HighlandPony