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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Monday morning CF

173 replies

Neurospicyy · 19/09/2022 09:28

I know lots are off today but there’s nothing like a bit of cheeky fuckery to start the week off so I thought I’d share.

I have a friend (A) who I socialise with very often, they bought a house close to me not long ago and I’d say we see each other more than any others in our group. We have been socialising alone for many months now as life has kept other friends too busy and this friend basically started treating me like shit. Trying to humiliate me, clearly had jo respect for meetc. I tried ending the friendship several times but always forgave.

Fast forward to earlier this week we were due to meet up with some other friends to celebrate friend A’s birthday. Friend A and I were waiting at the bar for other friends who weren’t due to arrive for an hour so they said they were running to the shop for some cigarettes. I was sat for 45 minutes before I accepted friend A wasn’t coming back. I haven’t spoken to them since and accepted the friendship is over. I am not going to be disrespected like that by anyone.

But woke up to a text this morning. Yesterday was their actual birthday, “drop my present round whenever”.
Aibu or are they a CF?

OP posts:
CrapBag39 · 19/09/2022 11:20

Reply “who dis?”

kateandme · 19/09/2022 11:22

This is just weird.so just ask her what the fuck is going on.i don't get why you wouldn't at this point.
God stop passive agressing,being silent or ignoring.ask her what the f happened and get an explanation.

Womencanlift · 19/09/2022 11:23

Is it usual in your group for the birthday person, who everyone has made the effort to come out for, just fucks off before everyone turns up?

That is very odd.

The whole group should be telling A where to go not just you.

WaveyHair · 19/09/2022 11:26

'It's at the bar, we left it there for you to pick up later'

Suspect A went off to another bar with other friends. You've seen her true colours-mute all sm from her and move on. don't block & burn bridges if you have mutual friends.

Downsize2021 · 19/09/2022 11:26

Cool. Will do.

When you drop that hour of my life back.

Bookworm777 · 19/09/2022 11:28

This makes no sense. Friend A left their own birthday drinks and went home rather than sit with you for 45 minutes for other friends to arrive? Why would they do that?

custardbear · 19/09/2022 11:29

frazzledasarock · 19/09/2022 10:46

That’s so odd.

friend A skipped out on her own birthday drinks?

Yes exactly, that's very strange? Is she ok? Could she have met a bloke and gone off with him, is she that sort of 'friend'?

StClare101 · 19/09/2022 11:30

This is when “no is a complete sentence “ is actually true!

”No”.

Them block.

InsomniacVampire · 19/09/2022 11:32

CrapBag39 · 19/09/2022 11:20

Reply “who dis?”

I would so do this!

sofap · 19/09/2022 11:32

AIBUs like this are the worst. If that is the full story then clearly you're not in the wrong.

Notthereagain · 19/09/2022 11:34

Neurospicyy · 19/09/2022 09:34

They certainly won’t be getting a reply although I was very tempted to say
“It went to the shop for a pack of cigarettes but it hasn’t come back yet” 😁

That’s an excellent response!

picklemewalnuts · 19/09/2022 11:35

Neurospicyy · 19/09/2022 10:31

Not sure why someone insinuated I’m not being truthful but it did actually happen.

To answer another poster, no this person didn’t return at all. And of course I was texting them, after about 10 minutes I started asking where they were and eventually got a reply after 45 minutes that they’d left and gone home and they didn’t think I’d mind as other friends were meeting up. I did say that they should have at least waited until I wasn’t alone and friends were definitely there before they left.

Predictive has your back here, clearly!

"Ok. Hahahah"

SurpriseSurprise · 19/09/2022 11:44

Tell her it went to the shop and never came back

what a rude cow

HettyHensHideaway · 19/09/2022 11:46

If this is real then there is more to this. No one just leaves before their own birthday celebration for no reason.

LookItsMeAgain · 19/09/2022 11:47

Reply "You mean you didn't already receive the gift I had delivered? A whole bag of "no more fucks to give" that I ordered special delivery for you?"

iekanda · 19/09/2022 11:49

Simply ignore

ZombieMumEB · 19/09/2022 11:57

No, reply with "Didn't it arrive? I arranged delivery for it and got a notification it was delivered. Maybe one of your neighbours got it? Can you check in with them to see if they accepted a package by mistake?"

Neolara · 19/09/2022 12:13

Neurospicyy · 19/09/2022 09:34

They certainly won’t be getting a reply although I was very tempted to say
“It went to the shop for a pack of cigarettes but it hasn’t come back yet” 😁

Excellent message. Please send it.

BirdinaHedge · 19/09/2022 12:26

But woke up to a text this morning. Yesterday was their actual birthday, “drop my present round whenever”.
Aibu or are they a CF?

It would be lovely to send a totally cutting witty comeback that will shut her up forever, but much more dignified to ignore & block.

GoneWithTheWine1 · 19/09/2022 12:32

"My present is my presence not associating with you anymore 😄"

sonjadog · 19/09/2022 12:32

I think I would just ignore that one.

Aubriella · 19/09/2022 12:39

Neurospicyy · 19/09/2022 10:31

Not sure why someone insinuated I’m not being truthful but it did actually happen.

To answer another poster, no this person didn’t return at all. And of course I was texting them, after about 10 minutes I started asking where they were and eventually got a reply after 45 minutes that they’d left and gone home and they didn’t think I’d mind as other friends were meeting up. I did say that they should have at least waited until I wasn’t alone and friends were definitely there before they left.

Tbf the first post is quite confusing.

So Friend A didn’t return to her own birthday drinks? Confused

lechatnoir · 19/09/2022 12:41

Ithinkiwanttobealone · 19/09/2022 10:10

"I won't be dropping anything over. You left me sitting in a bar alone for an hour with no attempt at an explanation or apologu. I no longer wish to be in touch."

Then block.

This (plus "this Is one of many times you have made
Me question our friendship but will be the last.

Don't piss about with witty or passive aggressive comments - the friendship is over so be a grown up about it and tell her why this is no longer acceptable.

Ladybyrd · 19/09/2022 12:42

At least you have the benefit of being able to take the moral high ground. Whichever way you look at it, she looks like an absolute bellend. I don't doubt she had the opposite result in mind. Honestly, I would just leave it at that.

Fraaahnces · 19/09/2022 12:45

I’d be forwarding her message to all mutual friends saying “Surely she can’t be serious?”

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