My dd is 17. She doesn't actually believe in God, but she is certainly extremely interested in all things spiritual. We have talked about this subject quite a lot, so I have a pretty good insight into her thinking on this.
I think she would really like the spiritual side of following a religion, as well as all the ritual of a church service, the wider community aspect and even all the music/singing etc. However, I can't see her ever wanting to go to a Christian church, because her perceptions of the church are generally very negative. There are a few reasons for this.
- She perceives a lot of Christians as being quite smug/arrogant. This is primarily based on a few Christians she knows who are very much of the view that Christianity is the only path to God/ the only way to salvation etc. She perceives them as being a little bit stupid for this, as if they somehow think that they've got it all worked out while the rest of the world's population are wrong, or worse, damned for eternity. She strongly dislikes people who are arrogant/consider themselves to be superior to others, and so she wouldn't want to associate herself with the church because that's how it comes across to get her. (To be clear, I fully understand that lots of Christians don't actually believe that Christianity is the only right path or that they have all the answers, but dd has been exposed to a few quite vocal people who are very much of this way of thinking.)
- She perceives the church as homophobic and misogynistic. Again, very off-putting for her, and probably for many other young people who may share this perception. (And again, I fully appreciate that this doesn't apply to all Christians but honestly speaking, it is the way that she sees it.)
- She is bemused by the people who deny basic science, such as evolution. She does understand that not all Christians take the bible literally, but again, she has been exposed to some who do, and she cannot begin to get her head around why anyone would believe that.
- She dislikes the way in which some Christians seem to believe that they have a monopoly on morality, as if people can't just behave well without any reference to a deity. She is also utterly bemused by the concept of original sin - it makes no sense to her that even a young child would somehow be guilty just by being human. And she has a perception that religious people can often be very judgemental towards others (e.g. on issues like abortion etc).
- She finds it hard to believe in a god who allows so much suffering in the world, and isn't remotely convinced by any of the Christian explanations or justifications for this. She also thinks that the Christian God comes across as being quite cruel in a lot of the Bible stories that she has heard...asking Abraham to sacrifice his son, for example, or repeatedly testing Job. She finds this very difficult to reconcile with the concept of a loving father.
I am not sharing the above to cause offence, but to give you an honest account of what would deter my dd from ever getting involved in the church, despite her interest in all things trivial.
It's tricky because I don't know how you could begin to go about changing perceptions like this. You can't change the entire church, no matter how hard you try. I have met a number of Christians over the years who have been amazing advocates for their faith - never through words but always through the power of their actions and the depth of their care and compassion for the most vulnerable people in our society. Those people are truly inspiring. Sadly, they tend to be outnumbered by the more vocal people who like to talk a lot about Christian values but don't really live by them in any meaningful way.
So, I guess my conclusion is that the best way of encouraging others to take an interest in your faith is not to actively try to encourage this in any way, but merely to inspire them by your own quiet example of a life lived in service to others.