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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think Prince Harry should now do whatever it takes to cancel his book contract?

808 replies

FromageRouge · 16/09/2022 22:13

And withdraw his book?

A rapprochement looks possible if he meets the RF halfway.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
9
Fullupdowntown1a1 · 17/09/2022 19:16

BlueRidge · 17/09/2022 19:10

@Murdoch1949 That piece of fiction you just posted was almost amusing.

@BlueRidge to be fair is this not more or less what Harry said happened? Bar the point about Kate and William being jealous which I doubt he’d ever say outloud even if he privately thought as much.

BlueRidge · 17/09/2022 19:19

"to be fair is this not more or less what Harry said happened?"

Well, as our dear late Queen said, "Recollections may vary."

IrisVersicolor · 17/09/2022 19:19

A580Hojas · 17/09/2022 18:53

"The world sees the first British royal to marry a mixed race woman being chased out of the country and frozen out at a funeral"

Is that better Iris? What is your point about race in that sentence?

God knows I'm a pedant but when you are reduced to pedantry to crush someone's comment it doesn't make you (one) want to engage.

It’s not pedantry to use quote marks correctly.

The point is that whatever the actual motivations: the world, the majority of whom are not white, see a non-white woman having to leave the monarchy she married into and leave the country, her husband having to cut ties with his own family for marrying her, and draw their own conclusions.

I don’t think race is the only issue - misogyny and xenophobia play their parts, and cultural differences of woke vs non-woke, and also snobbery, but even Diana didn’t cop with MM did, and she had a huge number of supporters and family and friends in this country to turn to, whereas MM did not.

It’s disingenuous to claim that MM left because she didn’t fancy royal life, when she was subject to abuse that no-one on this forum would ever want to be subject to and likely couldn’t deal with. It’s perfectly reasonable to suppose that if she’d been left alone she’d still be here.

IrisVersicolor · 17/09/2022 19:24

@Murdoch1949

The RF had the opportunity to defend and support the Sussexes when they were under siege from the vile UK press. They told the Sussexes to suck it up, even though they made the same error with Princess Diana. The Sussexes left the UK, had their HRH and charity patronages removed, Harry lost his military posts, which was unnecessary and cruel. The Sussexes were willing to split their lives between UK and USA, but that was rejected. The RF is antiquated, poorly advised by men in suits, and brought this on themselves. They continue to do it, with the Sussexes being first invited then de-invited to the Commonwealth heads dinner tomorrow - WHY? Rudeness personified.

I don’t agree with the rest of your post about jealousy, but this part is spot on.

Very very poor advice from upper class middle-aged white men who know a lot about palace protocol and fa about how the rest of the world works.

Fullupdowntown1a1 · 17/09/2022 19:27

BlueRidge · 17/09/2022 19:19

"to be fair is this not more or less what Harry said happened?"

Well, as our dear late Queen said, "Recollections may vary."

@BlueRidge true! but I just meant that @Murdoch1949 was mainly just summarising their side of the story that they are on record with, rather than making up fiction. The other side of the story, is less clear at the moment.

FromageRouge · 17/09/2022 20:11

I feel a bit like, every time anyone mentions H or M publicly, half the responses are “tell me everything you know/think about the Sussexes” bad exam answers.

OP posts:
Dinoteeth · 17/09/2022 22:02

IrisVersicolor · 17/09/2022 18:46

Because they’re family and H’s grandmother just died?

Is Andy a working royal? No he’s just a nonce.

The State reception isn't going to be your normal tea after a funeral.

It's representatives of other counties meeting the UK Royals who will have been briefed on each other and potentially know other issues with those other people.

Would H&M be willing to read the briefs and act in the professional hat rather than the family hat?

Diverseopinions · 17/09/2022 22:15

It didn't come across that they were having to leave the country because of their treatment by the press - not at the time.

Don't forget they had their own pet journalist - that guy who copped for the: 'Thanks for asking how I am; not a lot of people ask", comment in South Africa. He was a sort of friend, like Richard Kay was to Diana: a pet poodle to get good pics of them in the press. And now there is Omid. And the power of Sunshine Sachs, which all their privileged millions of pounds has been able to buy.

When they left Britain, H and M pre-empted a more carefully thought-out version of how the removal was going to function, by bouncing the Palace into a fait accompli, in the form of a published statement, saying that they were going to carve out a progressive new role within the Royal Family. It wasn't escape it was growth, thriving, and all that gumpf. They had also patented aspects of the 'Sussex' brand in readiness, and thought they could be the trendy royals, who do things in their own way, but still represent the crown. They found out they couldn't. But why did it take them so long to find out?

They wanted to control the narrative and be a sucker shoot sprouting off from the main rose bush of the Royal Family. That doesn't happen. All of us can try it in our own jobs....if we are in any doubt that life doesn't work in this way. Why don't we? We can go in on Tuesday and tell our bosses that they are fuddy duddies and that we are carving out our own progressive job role. We can email the client list with the news - without first informing our managers - and we can see what will happen. It won't be good. If we can see this, in advance, why can't Harry?

H and M were told to desist from publicly using HRH titles. Those titles go with working as an official royal. Boris Johnson can't continue to use 10 Downing Street and Chequers, now Liz Truss has the top job. A lot of privileges, in the UK, attach to the role and come with a big work load. In the case of royalty, when you.marry in, you are asked if you want to be a working royal. If you say 'no', you don't have to do it: you can be private and avoid public scrutiny.

It's all proscribed. The Royal Family isn't a mystery. Cressida Bonas and Chelsey Davies didn't want the attention and constrictions and they now have lovely beaux, without the same hassle as being with Harry. Please don't talk about Meghan, commentators, for a senior leadership role, if she can't even research the well-documented protocols of, perhaps the most unique and peculiar ( in the non-judgemental sense) famous family on the planet .....which also happens to be the one which she intends to marry into.

I don't read all the press, but I'm aware of opportunities and privileges being given to Meghan and Harry, like the African tour and the personal train trip with the Queen, on which quite frankly, I didn't notice her to be smiling along with the Queen, but more laughing into her hand to herself.

I mentioned Carrie Johnson above. Dominic Cummings has said that she is the 'Mad Queen' who wants to rule ( a story as old as time) and, on the back of that comment, practically the whole of the press decried her heavy influence and dug out quotes by other politicians along that theme of her interfering too much. Lots of people get unhelpful press. Having a high profile engenders it. You don't have to go for a high profile, you can choose to marry in and be a non-working royal.

Meghan was hugely fortunate to have had the means of controlling the media narrative of who she is and what she believes in. She had a lot of freedom to do Vogue editions and clothes for work projects and her own favourite stuff. This gave her a direct voice through the media to say in her own words, who she thought she was. If we are saying that it didn't counter other press ramblings, then maybe it's because people didn't take to what she was saying, because her ideas are not very powerful. There was that magazine cover with little pics of all the most influential women. She controlled what that article said, and it represented a big opportunity for her to make her mark.

I'm gob smacked at their naivety as a couple. I just think, well if I know that when you meet the cast of Lion King, that it's too support the theatre industry, ...then why doesn't Harry? If I know you don't shake hands with the producer and then say: " My wife does voice over work, you know? She's good!". Flipping hell! Doesn't Harry know that too! That evening should have been about putting the spotlight on the theatres which have had a shocking time through Covid; not feathering your own nest, with a cheeky comment, when you're supposed to be representing the British public. You could see by everyone else's faces, Beyonce, etc., that they also knew that he was out of order.

I can't take H and M's grievances seriously, because they don't seem to know their arse from their elbow. Harry even got taken in by a fictitious, pranking Greta Thurburg and gave her, a supposed kid, as far as he thought, his personal pitch and spiel as to who he is... a thoroughly down to earth guy. The way H and M view things is so off kilter, that I don't think anyone can believe what they imply about having being unfairly treated. Their judgement is warped.

antelopevalley · 17/09/2022 22:18

Fullupdowntown1a1 · 17/09/2022 19:27

@BlueRidge true! but I just meant that @Murdoch1949 was mainly just summarising their side of the story that they are on record with, rather than making up fiction. The other side of the story, is less clear at the moment.

The Queen basically said they were lying.

Sheenqueen · 17/09/2022 22:35

Britain has some very stupid, racist people.

I see newspapers around the world drawing that same conclusion.

Racist imbeciles.

Pinkcadillac · 17/09/2022 22:49

Diverseopinions · 17/09/2022 22:15

It didn't come across that they were having to leave the country because of their treatment by the press - not at the time.

Don't forget they had their own pet journalist - that guy who copped for the: 'Thanks for asking how I am; not a lot of people ask", comment in South Africa. He was a sort of friend, like Richard Kay was to Diana: a pet poodle to get good pics of them in the press. And now there is Omid. And the power of Sunshine Sachs, which all their privileged millions of pounds has been able to buy.

When they left Britain, H and M pre-empted a more carefully thought-out version of how the removal was going to function, by bouncing the Palace into a fait accompli, in the form of a published statement, saying that they were going to carve out a progressive new role within the Royal Family. It wasn't escape it was growth, thriving, and all that gumpf. They had also patented aspects of the 'Sussex' brand in readiness, and thought they could be the trendy royals, who do things in their own way, but still represent the crown. They found out they couldn't. But why did it take them so long to find out?

They wanted to control the narrative and be a sucker shoot sprouting off from the main rose bush of the Royal Family. That doesn't happen. All of us can try it in our own jobs....if we are in any doubt that life doesn't work in this way. Why don't we? We can go in on Tuesday and tell our bosses that they are fuddy duddies and that we are carving out our own progressive job role. We can email the client list with the news - without first informing our managers - and we can see what will happen. It won't be good. If we can see this, in advance, why can't Harry?

H and M were told to desist from publicly using HRH titles. Those titles go with working as an official royal. Boris Johnson can't continue to use 10 Downing Street and Chequers, now Liz Truss has the top job. A lot of privileges, in the UK, attach to the role and come with a big work load. In the case of royalty, when you.marry in, you are asked if you want to be a working royal. If you say 'no', you don't have to do it: you can be private and avoid public scrutiny.

It's all proscribed. The Royal Family isn't a mystery. Cressida Bonas and Chelsey Davies didn't want the attention and constrictions and they now have lovely beaux, without the same hassle as being with Harry. Please don't talk about Meghan, commentators, for a senior leadership role, if she can't even research the well-documented protocols of, perhaps the most unique and peculiar ( in the non-judgemental sense) famous family on the planet .....which also happens to be the one which she intends to marry into.

I don't read all the press, but I'm aware of opportunities and privileges being given to Meghan and Harry, like the African tour and the personal train trip with the Queen, on which quite frankly, I didn't notice her to be smiling along with the Queen, but more laughing into her hand to herself.

I mentioned Carrie Johnson above. Dominic Cummings has said that she is the 'Mad Queen' who wants to rule ( a story as old as time) and, on the back of that comment, practically the whole of the press decried her heavy influence and dug out quotes by other politicians along that theme of her interfering too much. Lots of people get unhelpful press. Having a high profile engenders it. You don't have to go for a high profile, you can choose to marry in and be a non-working royal.

Meghan was hugely fortunate to have had the means of controlling the media narrative of who she is and what she believes in. She had a lot of freedom to do Vogue editions and clothes for work projects and her own favourite stuff. This gave her a direct voice through the media to say in her own words, who she thought she was. If we are saying that it didn't counter other press ramblings, then maybe it's because people didn't take to what she was saying, because her ideas are not very powerful. There was that magazine cover with little pics of all the most influential women. She controlled what that article said, and it represented a big opportunity for her to make her mark.

I'm gob smacked at their naivety as a couple. I just think, well if I know that when you meet the cast of Lion King, that it's too support the theatre industry, ...then why doesn't Harry? If I know you don't shake hands with the producer and then say: " My wife does voice over work, you know? She's good!". Flipping hell! Doesn't Harry know that too! That evening should have been about putting the spotlight on the theatres which have had a shocking time through Covid; not feathering your own nest, with a cheeky comment, when you're supposed to be representing the British public. You could see by everyone else's faces, Beyonce, etc., that they also knew that he was out of order.

I can't take H and M's grievances seriously, because they don't seem to know their arse from their elbow. Harry even got taken in by a fictitious, pranking Greta Thurburg and gave her, a supposed kid, as far as he thought, his personal pitch and spiel as to who he is... a thoroughly down to earth guy. The way H and M view things is so off kilter, that I don't think anyone can believe what they imply about having being unfairly treated. Their judgement is warped.

This 100%.

LondonWolf · 17/09/2022 22:53

Sheenqueen · 17/09/2022 22:35

Britain has some very stupid, racist people.

I see newspapers around the world drawing that same conclusion.

Racist imbeciles.

Isn't "imbeciles" an ableist slur these days?

oakleaffy · 17/09/2022 23:19

Diverseopinions · 17/09/2022 22:15

It didn't come across that they were having to leave the country because of their treatment by the press - not at the time.

Don't forget they had their own pet journalist - that guy who copped for the: 'Thanks for asking how I am; not a lot of people ask", comment in South Africa. He was a sort of friend, like Richard Kay was to Diana: a pet poodle to get good pics of them in the press. And now there is Omid. And the power of Sunshine Sachs, which all their privileged millions of pounds has been able to buy.

When they left Britain, H and M pre-empted a more carefully thought-out version of how the removal was going to function, by bouncing the Palace into a fait accompli, in the form of a published statement, saying that they were going to carve out a progressive new role within the Royal Family. It wasn't escape it was growth, thriving, and all that gumpf. They had also patented aspects of the 'Sussex' brand in readiness, and thought they could be the trendy royals, who do things in their own way, but still represent the crown. They found out they couldn't. But why did it take them so long to find out?

They wanted to control the narrative and be a sucker shoot sprouting off from the main rose bush of the Royal Family. That doesn't happen. All of us can try it in our own jobs....if we are in any doubt that life doesn't work in this way. Why don't we? We can go in on Tuesday and tell our bosses that they are fuddy duddies and that we are carving out our own progressive job role. We can email the client list with the news - without first informing our managers - and we can see what will happen. It won't be good. If we can see this, in advance, why can't Harry?

H and M were told to desist from publicly using HRH titles. Those titles go with working as an official royal. Boris Johnson can't continue to use 10 Downing Street and Chequers, now Liz Truss has the top job. A lot of privileges, in the UK, attach to the role and come with a big work load. In the case of royalty, when you.marry in, you are asked if you want to be a working royal. If you say 'no', you don't have to do it: you can be private and avoid public scrutiny.

It's all proscribed. The Royal Family isn't a mystery. Cressida Bonas and Chelsey Davies didn't want the attention and constrictions and they now have lovely beaux, without the same hassle as being with Harry. Please don't talk about Meghan, commentators, for a senior leadership role, if she can't even research the well-documented protocols of, perhaps the most unique and peculiar ( in the non-judgemental sense) famous family on the planet .....which also happens to be the one which she intends to marry into.

I don't read all the press, but I'm aware of opportunities and privileges being given to Meghan and Harry, like the African tour and the personal train trip with the Queen, on which quite frankly, I didn't notice her to be smiling along with the Queen, but more laughing into her hand to herself.

I mentioned Carrie Johnson above. Dominic Cummings has said that she is the 'Mad Queen' who wants to rule ( a story as old as time) and, on the back of that comment, practically the whole of the press decried her heavy influence and dug out quotes by other politicians along that theme of her interfering too much. Lots of people get unhelpful press. Having a high profile engenders it. You don't have to go for a high profile, you can choose to marry in and be a non-working royal.

Meghan was hugely fortunate to have had the means of controlling the media narrative of who she is and what she believes in. She had a lot of freedom to do Vogue editions and clothes for work projects and her own favourite stuff. This gave her a direct voice through the media to say in her own words, who she thought she was. If we are saying that it didn't counter other press ramblings, then maybe it's because people didn't take to what she was saying, because her ideas are not very powerful. There was that magazine cover with little pics of all the most influential women. She controlled what that article said, and it represented a big opportunity for her to make her mark.

I'm gob smacked at their naivety as a couple. I just think, well if I know that when you meet the cast of Lion King, that it's too support the theatre industry, ...then why doesn't Harry? If I know you don't shake hands with the producer and then say: " My wife does voice over work, you know? She's good!". Flipping hell! Doesn't Harry know that too! That evening should have been about putting the spotlight on the theatres which have had a shocking time through Covid; not feathering your own nest, with a cheeky comment, when you're supposed to be representing the British public. You could see by everyone else's faces, Beyonce, etc., that they also knew that he was out of order.

I can't take H and M's grievances seriously, because they don't seem to know their arse from their elbow. Harry even got taken in by a fictitious, pranking Greta Thurburg and gave her, a supposed kid, as far as he thought, his personal pitch and spiel as to who he is... a thoroughly down to earth guy. The way H and M view things is so off kilter, that I don't think anyone can believe what they imply about having being unfairly treated. Their judgement is warped.

Superb post

Astute and accurate every point. 👍

friendlycat · 18/09/2022 00:01

Well written post oakleaffy. Couldn’t agree more.

The naivety is astonishing.

friendlycat · 18/09/2022 00:04

Apologies. Diverseopinions wrote the post.

Dinoteeth · 18/09/2022 00:20

Agreed @Diverseopinions

I think at one point they wanted to cherry pick the glam aspects of being Royal while trading off the Royal name.
RF were completely against that idea. Once bitten twice shy remembering the Sophie incident.

Someone up thread mentioned it was cruel to strip Harry of his Military posts. How is it?
Why should the people serving in the military who have sworn to protect Queen and Country have an Honoury Chief who lives abroad who is no longer full invested in the country they serve?

MissMarplesGoddaughter · 18/09/2022 01:00

@Diverseopinions
Absolutely spot on.

Sarahzb · 18/09/2022 04:39

Publish and be damned

TomPinch · 18/09/2022 07:02

Where I am (NZ) Megan isn't of any great moment. Most people who follow the rift do so to guffaw.

Some here might think people of colour might support M, but there's very little evidence of that. The opinion pieces in the media are broadly a) respectful reflections on the Queen's life b) the funeral arrangements c) whether whether H gets to wear his uniform d) what dignitaries are going and how many times Jacinda Ardern gets to meet the King and of course e) whether the monarchy still has value to NZ's constitutional arrangements.

Really not a lot about M.

IrisVersicolor · 18/09/2022 08:03

Dinoteeth · 17/09/2022 22:02

The State reception isn't going to be your normal tea after a funeral.

It's representatives of other counties meeting the UK Royals who will have been briefed on each other and potentially know other issues with those other people.

Would H&M be willing to read the briefs and act in the professional hat rather than the family hat?

Are you saying they can’t act professionally there as they have done thus far at the funeral events?

Can Andy keep his hands of the female guests? Apparently he can’t even keep his hands off his own daughter.

IrisVersicolor · 18/09/2022 08:11

It didn't come across that they were having to leave the country because of their treatment by the press - not at the time.

I’m sorry I couldn’t be bothered to read your post beyond the first line.

MM was told she was the “most trolled person in the entire world” and described the online abuse she experience as: “almost unsurvivable”.

Of course people who bitched about her from the get go couldn’t admit that because they would be implicated.

Meili04 · 18/09/2022 08:13

IrisVersicolor · 18/09/2022 08:03

Are you saying they can’t act professionally there as they have done thus far at the funeral events?

Can Andy keep his hands of the female guests? Apparently he can’t even keep his hands off his own daughter.

Andrew isn't going either. The concern is M&H will probably try to merch or sell stories off the back of it. The world's most powerful people are going and M&H have left the RF. If they didn't sell stories they might have been allowed to go.

Dinoteeth · 18/09/2022 08:16

The State Reception is effectively work, it's meeting foreign representatives in a professional capacity.

H&M no longer work for the UK, they don't even live in the UK, why should they represent the UK?

It's like taking an ex-employee who's slated your company to a business meeting, why on earth would you?

Randy Andy won't be there either.

ReneBumsWombats · 18/09/2022 08:18

How popular are M and H in America? That's their target market now. Is it working? What's the public feeling towards them?

Roussette · 18/09/2022 08:23

IrisVersicolor · 18/09/2022 08:11

It didn't come across that they were having to leave the country because of their treatment by the press - not at the time.

I’m sorry I couldn’t be bothered to read your post beyond the first line.

MM was told she was the “most trolled person in the entire world” and described the online abuse she experience as: “almost unsurvivable”.

Of course people who bitched about her from the get go couldn’t admit that because they would be implicated.

^^ This.

And I tell you what... if the Queen or Clarence House or even Charles had put out a statement strongly condemning the disgusting racist and awful press H&M were getting at the time, we would not be in this position now. But they didn't. They did manage to put out a statement that Kate didn't have hair extensions though...
Says it all

I read the whole of that post... an over invested screed of massive criticism and dislike.