Pregnancy test threads

[Wouldloveanother]

Now don’t think I’m one of those cool, logical women who can wait for late period before testing because I’m not! But I know if I test and I can’t say definitively that it’s positive, to try again the next day and the next but to remain realistic.

I’ve seen quite a few threads now with clearly negative tests where the responses are all ‘I can see something!’ And egging the OP on to buy more tests. So they test again, another vague shadow line, responses are the same. Days later, no real change and it’s clear it’s either a chemical pregnancy or the tests were a bit rubbish, but the OP has been convinced the tests are positive at this point and is devastated when her period turns up.

AIBU to think there needs to be a bit more honesty on such threads, to manage expectations?

I’ve posted a couple of pictures before of a faint line on MN before. I had a twin miscarriage and I was desperate to see a positive again. Let’s be honest mentally it’s not the best to take multiple tests and it’s better to just wait it out a couple of days to see if the lines darker. I know that myself but once you start to see a line or think you do, you fill with excitement and hope. If you do not want people IRL to know then MN is a place to post. Yes it is out of desperation usually but I’d never let anyone judge the way I’ve become since my loss and ttc again

I do however fully agree with your point about some of the “congratulations” comments under the posts. Sometimes I do cringe myself if I’m looking at someone’s extremely barely there faint line, even if I see it myself I wouldn’t say congratulations unless it was clearly positive. This can mess with emotions. A simple I can see it - try again tomorrow is a better reply.

I didn’t like your post about threads for older mums in their 40’s. You are allowed to be excited and hopeful and I know many mums in their mid 40’s. Maybe they struggled with infertility for years or didn’t meet their partner until later on? What do you expect people to write “Congratulations! Although you’ll probably miscarry so…”
You can miscarry at any age, it does go up in risk but I’m 27 and have miscarried. There are woman in their 40’s who haven’t miscarried.

I wouldn’t say anything if they seemed aware of the risks, eg ‘just found out I’m pregnant, if it sticks..’ etc. If the risks were 5% or even 20%, I wouldn’t see the need to mention it, but when it’s more likely than not that it won’t work out, all the ‘congrats’ messages seem a bit jinxey. But, just my opinion and like I said I wouldn’t personally comment.

@Essexgalhere oh absolutely, and I’m not saying people should deny seeing any line that isn’t clear and blazing. The few times I’ve replied it’s been ‘I think I can see something (if I can) but can’t say for certain, maybe try again in a few days?’.

You can’t really compare the odds of a woman in her 20s miscarrying with a 45 year old - the former is something like 8%, the latter 75%. Using outliers as examples doesn’t really make a point, but I do understand wanting to hang on to the hope.

@Wouldloveanother but why is it your place to mention it?

It won’t change their outcome and you just come across as cruel.

The wedding things is weird.

Also it is frustrating when they take a photo of the whole test rather than zooming in to the lines.

That said, 9/10 there is a second line - and it’s really weird when posters insist there’s nothing there.

FRERs these days have visible second lines straight out of the packet.

Agree, if you know what you’re looking for then they’re very clear to see.

Um yup this poster has covid 🫣

Don't mind the line eyes threads so much

But the amount of photos posted where the poster has done one of the cheap strip tests and they're holding it by the pissy end...why??

Yes you are the only woman who has ever waited to test 🏅

I know! They're always full of people falsely reassuring the OP that the father MUST be her partner. They can't possibly know that for sure. If there's even a 1% chance that the father is someone else, her partner deserves to know.

@BootSlippers That gives me the ick. And in what I know is a VERY unpopular opinion, I think that keeping used pregnancy tests is absolutely disgusting.

I know my anxiety would be triggered really badly by any kind of lines, so I only do the tests that spell out PREGNANT or NOT PREGNANT in words, so I can't get stressed or confused about it.

Oh, I kept mine! With the lids on naturally 😬 for some reason I’m sentimental over them… they’re at the bottom of a drawer though, not on display

@Wouldloveanother I just think it's weird! You wouldn't wee on anything else and then shove it in a draw to fester.

I'm prepared to be told I'm a germaphobe or have a heart of stone though...

@allfurcoatnoknickers my pregnancy tests and 1 scan are in a memory box for the twins I lost in April. I know a lot of woman keep there’s especially if they have lost that baby / babies

It is a bit weird to be fair @allfurcoatnoknickers but they’ll stay in the bottom of my drawer! Superstition maybe!