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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To notice a growing hatred and intolerance of woman online?

117 replies

foxofthefells · 09/09/2022 16:11

It's mostly in the past 2 years, typically in youtube comments under relatively benign things such as tv drama or film. I am also noticing it more on Amazon reviews when watching Prime tv content.

It's basically a fairly angry dismissal of women in general, so if a female character runs a police team or has an important, respectable role, the comments will often claim it to be 'woke' or 'women worship'. It is as if any respectful characterisation of a woman, especially in positions of power (whether in a career or sexuality) is degrading to men.
Alternatively, if the film or series depicts a troubled or vulnerable woman they remain suspiciously silent.

I have been watching and reading the same stuff over many years on the net, but have only noticed this growing loathing in the past two yrs or so.

More troubling are the comments or reviews of stories that depict crimes against women (Broadchurch, etc), where the content is described as 'pandering to women', 'men hating' or, again (and predictably....'woke'.
So, technically, it seems to be upsetting a lot of men to have to watch justice being done for rape and assault against women.
One crime series I watched recently depicted male members of a comany being held to account for sexual harassment. The comments/reviews for this were full of men complaining that back in the 80's women didn't mind being 'felt up' at work, so what is all the fuss about?

Has anyone else noticed this? I certainly don't look for this type of crap online, but often find it nestled in otherwise innocent places, and it appears to be growing.
I can't get my head around why any man would feel angry that we have to reduce harm and inappropriateness in general. Who are these cretins? Are they just baiting for a fight? Most of them seem genuinely upset that they can't enjoy the degradation of females in media anymore. It's a bit grim.
How many of them are there, and is this likely to become worse?

OP posts:
Happycamper2022 · 10/09/2022 08:15

Mumspair1 · 10/09/2022 08:14

Er no. He had a family who handed it to him not because he's a man.

His sisters never got it 😂😂😂😂
It was because he was the 'only son' i assure you

CousinGregg · 10/09/2022 08:17

Make it a black woman and that really gets them going.

Sparklfairy · 10/09/2022 08:18

She-Hulk, when it first launched at least, had automatic accusations of being woke and forcing women into the male hulk role.

It was pure ignorance, they hadn't even seen the show yet, and She-Hulk was actually a comic decades ago, but the automatic jumping to conclusions was pretty stark. But the Marvel fans obviously had never been fans of the original comics Wink

User135644 · 10/09/2022 08:20

There's a whole generation of dateless and very lonely men out there (Incels) and there's content creators exploiting that to radicalise them.

Happycamper2022 · 10/09/2022 08:25

User135644 · 10/09/2022 08:20

There's a whole generation of dateless and very lonely men out there (Incels) and there's content creators exploiting that to radicalise them.

They are dateless and womans self esteem and earning has raised
There was a recent study published in psychology today that men are lonelier not because womans standards have gone through the roof - its because they are 'healthy'
Woman no longer are tolerating the men they used to - because why? These men bring nothing to the table except drama, debt and depression
I am sure they would love a date with a professional woman earning great money - until it actually happens and it shines a light on how they were told they were entitled to do whatever they want as they were already socialised to over estimate their worth - and she is a mirror shining back at everything he lacks. Then the abuse sets in and bobs your uncle.

User135644 · 10/09/2022 08:46

Happycamper2022 · 10/09/2022 08:25

They are dateless and womans self esteem and earning has raised
There was a recent study published in psychology today that men are lonelier not because womans standards have gone through the roof - its because they are 'healthy'
Woman no longer are tolerating the men they used to - because why? These men bring nothing to the table except drama, debt and depression
I am sure they would love a date with a professional woman earning great money - until it actually happens and it shines a light on how they were told they were entitled to do whatever they want as they were already socialised to over estimate their worth - and she is a mirror shining back at everything he lacks. Then the abuse sets in and bobs your uncle.

Yeah women no longer need to be saddled with men they don't want and can support themselves.

OLD as well. Women have limitless choice via swipes and matches (mostly really bad options) whereas for the average man on there they have to put a lot of work in just to get any matches which may not go anywhere and causes a lot of resentment.

Also it's the proliferation of pornography, and extreme pornography, all over the internet and of platforms like Only Fans that have destroyed the male psyche.

sHREDDIES19 · 10/09/2022 08:53

Well too bad as we (strong, powerful, confident and competent) women aren’t going anywhere. In fact, we’re only going to become more dominant in every part of society and the sooner these pathetic men realise and accept that, the better!

AlexClo · 10/09/2022 08:57

You've only just realised that men despise women unless they're weak, subservient and exist purely to please men?

lljkk · 10/09/2022 09:05

Oh goody, another man-hating thread on MN. It's at least 5 minutes since someone started the last one.

Happycamper2022 · 10/09/2022 09:06

I seen online that the only way men start to become decent is by accepting they are awful - grieving this over a period of a few years and literally rebuild themselves - with the help of counselling, close females in their family and friend network and dissolve their ego

How many men will actually do that? Its a bit harder than downloading tinder

Happycamper2022 · 10/09/2022 09:06

lljkk · 10/09/2022 09:05

Oh goody, another man-hating thread on MN. It's at least 5 minutes since someone started the last one.

Thats because every five minutes an abused woman wakes up are realises the reality

Handsoffmyrights · 10/09/2022 09:14

I agree. 'The Handmaid's Tale' seems more real than ever.
Just look at the abuse JK Rolwling gets - the death threats, the threats of violence, same with Posie Parker. I have lots of examples from Twitter of the vile, graphic, misogynistic, sexual and violent threats men publicly post to women. Threats that stand online, while women are persecuted for stating what a woman is/assert our rights to privacy, dignity and safety. Our rights to language around our sex, bodies, periods, pregnancy, menopause etc. eroded and hijacked all because men can't stand that a woman said "no" to them.
The TRAs are thugs, looking for an excuse to control, intimidate and abuse women.
We are belittled, bullied. We are a joke in a world that celebrates drag, with men choosing stage names based around supposedly smelly vaginas etc. The list goes on.
I'm not a Royalist, I don't care what Harry and Meghan do, but by God there's a witch hunt going on. It's disgusting.

BoviTraci · 10/09/2022 09:21

Look at What happened to Cressida Dick . Some men can't tolerate a woman at the top telling them what to do . She resigned. Allegedly broken down .

Handsoffmyrights · 10/09/2022 09:26

lljkk · 10/09/2022 09:05

Oh goody, another man-hating thread on MN. It's at least 5 minutes since someone started the last one.

Jean Hatchet tweets:

Men: "You're always banging on about feminism."
I know. Awkward. But you're always killing us. It's a dilemma.

endofthelinefinally · 10/09/2022 09:27

Just waiting to see how long it takes for other women to get MN to move this thread to the naughty corner.

BoviTraci · 10/09/2022 09:28

RestingMurderousFace · 09/09/2022 17:15

There seems to be a huge swathe of men online who only value pretty, young, fuckable women. The rest of us are surplus to requirements. Not sure if I'm noticing it more the older I get, or if they're actually increasing in number.

That's always been the case . They will always choose the illusion of good looks initially. It's just that the internet and social media has highlighted this fact .

Kanaloa · 10/09/2022 09:29

I’d maybe cut out ‘online.’ It’s rife in real life too. Look at how people deliberately pan and criticise women led superhero movies despite them having all the EXACT SAME FLAWS as male led superhero movies!!

The older I get the more I realise that men who value women as human beings equal to themselves aren’t the majority.

Sandra1984 · 10/09/2022 09:29

Happycamper2022 · 09/09/2022 16:30

They are uncomfortable as they cannot get away with the behaviour that benefitted them for decades. Thats all

This.

Kanaloa · 10/09/2022 09:35

Mumspair1 · 10/09/2022 07:51

I find it the other way around on MN!

What do you mean? Oh, all those posts going ‘ugh why all this fuss over MENS sports!! What’s the point?’ Or ‘how does everyone feel about the 14 MALE Doctor Who actors? Isn’t it basically just trying to play to the MALE audience? It’s so woke?’ Or ‘why do we need ANOTHER male marvel hero? It’s just playing to the snowflakes!’ When do you see that on here? Or do you mean women posting about men who have abused and hurt them, and you’re equating women being honest about male abuse with men hating to see women represented in media and sports?

FOJN · 10/09/2022 09:52

If only they could keep the hate on line...

www.sfchronicle.com/crime/article/Suspect-identified-in-reported-beheading-of-young-17430187.php

Just another day, just another woman murdered by an abusive ex partner.

Jean Hatchet tweets:

Men: "You're always banging on about feminism."
I know. Awkward. But you're always killing us. It's a dilemma.

How rude of us to talk about women being murdered by men.

FatFilledTrottyPuss · 10/09/2022 10:00

I’ve been really struck by how much air time has been given to discussion about incel A T, how many times his name has been mentioned and what platforms he’s been banned from but then also the sites still showing his videos. It felt to me like they were actually promoting him in a roundabout way.
I’d never heard of him before but suddenly everyone was talking about him. It was like a clarion call to incels everywhere ‘hey look at this man, he’s been silenced by women but you can still get his content here!’
Things are so awful for women and girls now I fear for my poor DD just starting secondary school and entering a world full of older boys who’ll treat her like shit because they’ve read up on incel boards and watched too much dehumanising violent porn. No wonder so many preteen and teen girls are fleeing womanhood altogether when this is how they see women being treated.

MoistBandana · 10/09/2022 10:03

lljkk · 10/09/2022 09:05

Oh goody, another man-hating thread on MN. It's at least 5 minutes since someone started the last one.

Maybe fewer threads would be made if men weren't such horrific arseholes.

And before anyone says NAMALT..

Any man that is friends with someone that is abusive, sexist, violent, misogynistic etc
They're part of the problem. Until men call out shit behaviour in their friends, relations, colleagues, men as a whole are the problem.

FreddyHG · 10/09/2022 10:04

foxofthefells · 09/09/2022 16:13

So basically it is woke now to respect a woman. What a neat way to conflate basic equality with extreme politics.

But everyone does that feminists on here included. There is always people who are trying to associate normal opinions with extreme beliefs to get them silenced. For example often if Mumsnet is having a good old misandry man hating session using language that when used against any other protected characteristic like travellers, Muslims or black people Mumsnet hq would ban instantly, and someone objects we see the mra comments banded about and incel language accusations. Even when this is obviously untrue it.

FreddyHG · 10/09/2022 10:07

Lol my point nicely proved in those most recent threads.

tootiredtobother · 10/09/2022 10:11

its the Red Pill men, go look them up, truly terrifying