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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To dread seeing this friend? Pyramid scheme

119 replies

oneproudmumma · 31/08/2022 10:03

My friend has recently gone down a so called healthy eating path which promotes herbal stuff that she sells (some kind of pyramid scheme). Her Instagram is full of pics of her in a bikini sucking her stomach in and of "success stories" etc. I find it all a bit cringe.

She tried to post a link to my Facebook wall to promote something which I swiftly deleted.

I don't see her too often these days but more recently she keeps asking me to meet up with her and I've been putting it off because I'm dreading her trying to push this weird diet and supplements on me.

AIBU?

OP posts:
TheLightSideOfTheMoon · 31/08/2022 10:06

Just Google the ingredients in it and say you’re allergic to one of them.

Then move the conversation on.

Coffeaddict · 31/08/2022 10:07

It could be her trying to catch with an old friend ( innocent) or her looking for a customer ( not so fun). I would mabey meet up once for a coffee just to see what her motives actually are. If it is to turn you into a customer say sorry you need to go straight after the coffee and have an excuse ready.
I'm also with you on not letting mlm crap on your social media that would have pissed me off as well

Invasionofthegutsnatchers · 31/08/2022 10:07

Yanbu

Eventually she will realise she's spending more than she's earning on overpriced, useless and possibly harmful products. Until then keep her at arms length.

imaginationhasfailedme · 31/08/2022 10:08

Herbalife? Hope her liver is ok.
If you want to meet up (without all the mlm crap), just go but keep an 'appointment' handy so you have to dash. Unless you want to be straight and say 'honestly, mate, I'm seriously not interested in any get skinny quick scheme. How's DH/kids/parents getting on'.
And if she asks why you won't promote her stuff, you can let her know you're a) not convinced by the product so won't be drawn in and b) she hasn't paid your advertising and marketing rate

Beamur · 31/08/2022 10:10

My DSD has had to distance herself from a friend deeply into Herbalife. They do encourage sales to friends and DSD got fed up of any social invitation actually being a ruse to flog stuff..

SleeplessInEngland · 31/08/2022 10:10

If you'd want to meet up with her otherwise then do so. The moment she brings up the scheme just say you haven no interest whatsoever in giving her money. If she takes the hint then no harm done and maybe you'll still have a friendship.

Poppins2016 · 31/08/2022 10:12

Herbalife? It's an unsustainable 'nutrition'/fitness regime...

If you want to see your friend (based on the past, not the present) I'd meet up for a quick coffee (state a time window) and prepare to shoot down any marketing talk should it arise... "I don't need it, I'm not interested, I came to catch up with you" etc... Hopefully you can then resume normal friendship!

NumptiesIncorporated · 31/08/2022 10:12

Oh good I feel for you.

I had a friend try to promote a pyramid scene tooth whitening product (she wasn't the person that you would order from, but I think she got a cut). She had photos before and after teeth - and it was blindingly obvious to anyone with half a braincell that the photos had been tampered with - peach coloured gums/lips on the before with the yellow teeth, and pink on the after.

Yet so many people fell for it.

I spoke to her about it - someone that I respected, I had helped her start up her business previously - and she was like 'oh, well, yeah, maybe'. So it was clear she knew, just didn't want to admit it outright. Horrible.

YANBU. Avoid.

LuckySnips · 31/08/2022 10:16

If you want to see her, agree to meet up and tell her you've been dying to tell her all about this Herbal supplement you've been using, you've got so much to tell her about what it's done for your life!!

Viviennemary · 31/08/2022 10:16

Just say your doctor has advised against these supplements. Or you have a good diet and do not wanttotake these. If she persists then say sorry I wont be meeting up with you again if you insist on trying to sell me this stuff.

Thepeopleversuswork · 31/08/2022 10:16

I have a friend who is into a MLM scheme. It’s incredibly tedious but I take the view that it makes her happy so she should just crack on but I have made it clear that I just don’t want to talk to her about it.

Live and let live and have boundaries. No need to get wrapped up in it.

daisychain01 · 31/08/2022 10:19

"Really sorry, friend, the energy crisis is coming up and I can only afford the essentials nowadays." END OF, Don't ask again!!

Namedifferentorquestion · 31/08/2022 10:34

These 'friends' that just want to sell stuff are a pain. They believe the get rich quick crap that these schemes promote - Herbalife, any MLM crap including Avon with the 'prizes' for draw tickets - people should know better but they don't.

Beautiful3 · 31/08/2022 10:35

I hadn't block a friend on fb for this reason too. I was sick of being tagged into fat photos (with the heads cropped off), friends were asking if that was me?! It was embarrassing because I was slim. I didn't want people thinking I'd become fat, posted it on sm, then lost weight drinking shakes!!!

Original poster
oneproudmumma · 31/08/2022 10:43

Thanks for the replies. I'm glad it's not just me. It is Herbalife yes. It's sad because it feels as if it has taken over her whole life. I rarely see photos of even her family without #healthylifestyle in! She was really good fun before all this..

I'd never take any kind of diet supplement, much less one that evolved from a MLM scheme. I'm a prime target for her though - post natal and carrying some extra pounds still!!

Out of interest, what does it do to the liver...? Confused Curious now..

OP posts:
PerfectlyPreservedQuagaarWarrior · 31/08/2022 10:45

Ugh nightmare. Have had to unfriend people on FB for this kind of nonsense before. It's fucking insidious.

Original poster
oneproudmumma · 31/08/2022 10:52

Yes I agree. Worse still she seems to have all these new friends who are all clearly part of the same scheme and there are lots of pictures of their very staged and posed nights out etc. Ick. Where's my old friend gone? 😩

OP posts:
Ohahjustalittlebit · 31/08/2022 10:55

I called a friend out on it before, got told I was ruining her life because I was jealous and it was her little business etc. I just said it was a pile of shite and she would regret it. She stopped talking to me and then her 'business' collapsed and she realised it was shite after all but never spoke to me again. I assume out of embarassment. I would not be able to keep silent.

Sparklesocks · 31/08/2022 10:57

Oh it’s tiring. I had a message out of the blue from a former work colleague I used to be friendly with, we had a good rapport and used to have a good natter at after work drinks but lost touch when she got a new job. I was really pleased to hear from her and we chatted for a bit about what we were up to etc. Wasn’t long before she started giving me an MLM spiel and I felt very foolish I had walked into it. Just made me very annoyed that she used our previous rapport to try and flog me her shitty make up. All that good will just vanished.

Original poster
oneproudmumma · 31/08/2022 10:58

@Ohahjustalittlebit it is a pile of shite but they are so brainwashed by these cults that it is impossible to get through to them by telling them it's shite. They inevitably will think everyone who is negative about their new venture is jealous 🤦🏻‍♀️

It's interesting to see even on this thread how these MLM schemes have ruined friendships.

OP posts:
Trying20 · 31/08/2022 10:59

This reply has been withdrawn

This post has been withdrawn by the OP

Original poster
oneproudmumma · 31/08/2022 11:01

@Sparklesocks I know how you feel - it just feels like they're only interested in a friendship if they stand to benefit personally from it - and for me, that is wrong on every level.

OP posts:
Nannyogg134 · 31/08/2022 11:01

YANBU one of my friends has started selling Body Shop and it's so cringy. I desperately want to tell her that it's not a business, it's pushing products to your family and friends. The faux inspirational pics/posts are the worst, I know she's being told to post most of these things, but it's like reading the inner thoughts of a cult member who doesn't realise the kool aid has an extra ingredient!

Original poster
oneproudmumma · 31/08/2022 11:03

@Trying20 the friendship is more an old-times-sake friendship. We don't really move in the same circles anymore, just loiter on social media and text every now and again...

It's just since she's fallen into the MLM trap her interest in meeting me for a "good old catch up" has ramped up significantly. In fact, it's off the scale 🥴

OP posts:
passport123 · 31/08/2022 11:04

oneproudmumma · 31/08/2022 10:03

My friend has recently gone down a so called healthy eating path which promotes herbal stuff that she sells (some kind of pyramid scheme). Her Instagram is full of pics of her in a bikini sucking her stomach in and of "success stories" etc. I find it all a bit cringe.

She tried to post a link to my Facebook wall to promote something which I swiftly deleted.

I don't see her too often these days but more recently she keeps asking me to meet up with her and I've been putting it off because I'm dreading her trying to push this weird diet and supplements on me.

AIBU?

First time she tries just say 'thanks but I'm not interested'. If she persists say 'I'm really not interested so please can we not discuss it, I'd hate to lose you as a friend.' If she persists after that, don't see her again.