Page 5 | To dread seeing this friend? Pyramid scheme

oneproudmumma · 2022-08-31T09:03:35+00:00

My friend has recently gone down a so called healthy eating path which promotes herbal stuff that she sells (some kind of pyramid scheme). Her Instagram is full of pics of her in a bikini sucking her stomach in and of "success stories" etc. I find it all a bit cringe. She tried to post a link to my Facebook wall to promote something which I swiftly deleted. I don't see her too often these days but more recently she keeps asking me to meet up with her and I've been putting it off because I'm dreading her trying to push this weird diet and supplements on me. AIBU?

KatherineofGaunt · 01/09/2022 07:31

If you're interested in learning more about the anti-MLM movement, there are plenty of YouTubers making content about it. Two of my faves are CC Suarez and Kiki Chanel (go back and watch Kiki's older stuff first) but there also Savannah Marie (go to her earlier videos, I find her recent longer live streams harder to watch!). Or a British woman called Charlotte Dickerson made several videos about her experience with Arbonne (she hasn't posted in a year or more but her content is worth going back to watch). There are many more out there, too.

OperaStation · 01/09/2022 08:06

pictish · 01/09/2022 06:53

My workplace has quite a few people selling this sort of crap. I have standard and honest answers for anyone trying it on with me.

Body Shop - I get everything from Tesco and Boots. I don’t need anything.
Scentsy - I don’t use wax melts, thanks. I’ve got a load of scented candles given as gifts to work through. I don’t need anything.
Tropic - I’ve just bought a load of skincare, so I don’t need anything.

I don’t need anything.
I don’t need anything.
I don’t need anything.

Go away.

The really honest answer would be “I don’t support MLMs”

YouOKHun · 01/09/2022 08:37

There is a film about Herbalife called Betting on Zero. It shows the damage it does to people at the bottom of the pyramid. Also on Netflix there is a documentary about Doterra (essential oils MLM that once claimed its products could cure Ebola). The documentary is called ‘(Un)well’

pictish · 03/09/2022 07:04

OperaStation · 01/09/2022 08:06

The really honest answer would be “I don’t support MLMs”

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True. But then you’re going to have sit through a load of spiel about how it’s NOT like that and I cba to listen to it.
Much better to tell another truth. I have shower gel and face cream already thanks and I don’t use wax melts either.

piesforever · 07/09/2022 07:08

These MLM schemes target women with young kids that want flexible working....if the government subsidised affordable good childcare and employers offered it, they would not exist! They are disgusting. I would just say sorry, I'm allergic, and hope she gets the message, she'll no doubt realise she's lost the money in a few months and then go back to normal and never speak of it again!

Banana2079 · 07/09/2022 07:38

You sure you are a friend? You don’t know that she wants to meet up with you about the herbal stuff just ask her ..Tell her you’d like to meet up but you’re not interested in all the herbal stuff .. But for someone you state is a friend,you’re not being very supportive ! she has found something which she enjoys doing, All you need to say to her is that you’re not interested in that kind of thing. U come across as a bit jealous and mean to be honest if you don’t want her as friend just delete her completely instead of moaning on mumsnet . My friend has recently signed up to Some promotion and I’ve been supporting her because it’s all she’s been talking about even though it’s not for me.

CruCru · 07/09/2022 08:44

U come across as a bit jealous

I hate this, it’s used to shut women down. Jealousy and envy are actually quite rare emotions, I’ll be amazed if anyone is actually envious of someone recruiting for a MLM.

YouOKHun · 07/09/2022 09:26

Banana2079 · 07/09/2022 07:38

You sure you are a friend? You don’t know that she wants to meet up with you about the herbal stuff just ask her ..Tell her you’d like to meet up but you’re not interested in all the herbal stuff .. But for someone you state is a friend,you’re not being very supportive ! she has found something which she enjoys doing, All you need to say to her is that you’re not interested in that kind of thing. U come across as a bit jealous and mean to be honest if you don’t want her as friend just delete her completely instead of moaning on mumsnet . My friend has recently signed up to Some promotion and I’ve been supporting her because it’s all she’s been talking about even though it’s not for me.

It depends what you mean by support though? Going along with a friend who is under the spell of an MLM scam isn’t going to help them nor is buying product to support the friend, it’s just contributing to the delusion.

I agree that there’s no need to be unkind and sadly they are not likely to be receptive to counter arguments as they are told to expect “negative people who don’t have our vision/entrepreneurial spirit etc”, so that when someone says “I think it’s a pyramid scheme” or expresses any doubt the new sign up to MLM is primed to think that person is envious or against them in some way.

I don’t blame the OP at all for wanting to avoid the hard sell and the attempts to recruit her. Yes trying to maintain a friendship is a good thing (they’re going to need none MLM friends) but these people can become pretty unbearable to be around. The idea that someone is “jealous” because they hate MLM and don’t want to be around someone makes you sound like you might be part of something similar or taken on a similar way of thinking.

WetWednesday · 07/09/2022 09:40

@Maisa45 oh please do a AMA thread.

It's rare to see anyone who has gone through the MLM machine and can give an inside view. It's good you can laugh about it now though.

Calphurnia88 · 07/09/2022 10:06

Banana2079 · 07/09/2022 07:38

You sure you are a friend? You don’t know that she wants to meet up with you about the herbal stuff just ask her ..Tell her you’d like to meet up but you’re not interested in all the herbal stuff .. But for someone you state is a friend,you’re not being very supportive ! she has found something which she enjoys doing, All you need to say to her is that you’re not interested in that kind of thing. U come across as a bit jealous and mean to be honest if you don’t want her as friend just delete her completely instead of moaning on mumsnet . My friend has recently signed up to Some promotion and I’ve been supporting her because it’s all she’s been talking about even though it’s not for me.

My friend has recently signed up to Some promotion and I’ve been supporting her because it’s all she’s been talking about even though it’s not for me

This doesn't sound like much fun.

YouOKHun · 07/09/2022 12:51

Maisa45 · 31/08/2022 11:55

That is probably how they sucked her in - they promise you financial security then make you spend all the money you don't have. I paid £200 for my starter pack and was told it was an "investment". I was also pressured to throw a launch party even though I really didn't want to. My upline came over to do a speech and I spent a fortune on food and drinks and didn't sell anything. I should have NC'd for this because I could tell so much more. Me and my DH and my brother still laugh about a member of my upline telling me to go for drinks alone, buy two drinks and pretend on FB that I was meeting a new team member to generate curiosity about my "growing business".

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@Maisa45 you should come and join the Botwatch thread in Money Matters, lots of people there know ALL about FLP and their dodgy lying uplines! We’ve been tracking them for years (and other MLM).

MyNameIsAngelicaSchuyler · 07/09/2022 13:01

Ugh I CAN’T STAND this! I’ve had the same from that stupid pampered chef thing, body shop, now some energy company has suckered someone in too. There was even a mum trying to sell some ionised water machine, it is sad really they get suckered into these absolute bull shit schemes. I don’t meet up with them or entertain ANY discussion anymore.

GremlinDolphin4 · 07/09/2022 13:44

I hate MLM but had a soft spot for Pampered Chef and miss it! Their core products were so good and the person who did it round here was a fabulous cook so you got to eat at a demo too. I had a couple of really lovely evenings with PC.

Original poster

oneproudmumma · 09/09/2022 06:34

Banana2079 · 07/09/2022 07:38

You sure you are a friend? You don’t know that she wants to meet up with you about the herbal stuff just ask her ..Tell her you’d like to meet up but you’re not interested in all the herbal stuff .. But for someone you state is a friend,you’re not being very supportive ! she has found something which she enjoys doing, All you need to say to her is that you’re not interested in that kind of thing. U come across as a bit jealous and mean to be honest if you don’t want her as friend just delete her completely instead of moaning on mumsnet . My friend has recently signed up to Some promotion and I’ve been supporting her because it’s all she’s been talking about even though it’s not for me.

I'm not in the slightest bit jealous, no. I have muted her on Instagram now because it (her MLM scheme) is literally all she puts on there now. It's tedius. What am I jealous about? 🧐

OP posts:

Herejustforthisone · 09/09/2022 18:50

Banana2079 · 07/09/2022 07:38

You sure you are a friend? You don’t know that she wants to meet up with you about the herbal stuff just ask her ..Tell her you’d like to meet up but you’re not interested in all the herbal stuff .. But for someone you state is a friend,you’re not being very supportive ! she has found something which she enjoys doing, All you need to say to her is that you’re not interested in that kind of thing. U come across as a bit jealous and mean to be honest if you don’t want her as friend just delete her completely instead of moaning on mumsnet . My friend has recently signed up to Some promotion and I’ve been supporting her because it’s all she’s been talking about even though it’s not for me.

You’re your ‘friend’ aren’t you?

BloodAndFire · 09/09/2022 19:08

Banana2079 · 07/09/2022 07:38

You sure you are a friend? You don’t know that she wants to meet up with you about the herbal stuff just ask her ..Tell her you’d like to meet up but you’re not interested in all the herbal stuff .. But for someone you state is a friend,you’re not being very supportive ! she has found something which she enjoys doing, All you need to say to her is that you’re not interested in that kind of thing. U come across as a bit jealous and mean to be honest if you don’t want her as friend just delete her completely instead of moaning on mumsnet . My friend has recently signed up to Some promotion and I’ve been supporting her because it’s all she’s been talking about even though it’s not for me.

Which one do you unsuccessfully hawk around your (soon-to-be-ex) friends?

PerfectlyPreservedQuagaarWarrior · 09/09/2022 19:37

Why in the name of all that is sacred would anyone be jealous of someone being in an MLM? They're hardly exclusive and inaccessible.

BloodAndFire · 09/09/2022 21:12

PerfectlyPreservedQuagaarWarrior · 09/09/2022 19:37

Why in the name of all that is sacred would anyone be jealous of someone being in an MLM? They're hardly exclusive and inaccessible.

If anyone says anything remotely negative about anything at all on Mumsnet, they will be accused of being 'jealous' and 'bitter'.

Literally anything. Even things which are immediately accessible to anyone at all. It's just a knee-jerk response to criticism.

donttalkaboutbookclub · 10/09/2022 10:10

FourChimneys · 31/08/2022 15:48

Several years ago I knew a young child who was dying of cancer. I also knew a woman who was selling aloe vera or some such nonsense. She was desperate to be put in touch with the mother of the dying child to sell her miraculous "cure".

She was so brainwashed she thought she knew better than Great Ormond Street. She also had a product to help the parents through their grief, apparently. Utter wickedness at a terrible time.

That's horrific. I had someone I thought might be a friend once - we were doing a course together and got on well. She rang me to ask me over to hers for coffee, how lovely. Then she mentioned I might also be interested in some aloe vera when I was there as it was a 'get together'. I was really hurt as it felt as if she had just been fishing for new clients on the course and it was all fake.