Friends a thief ...aibu to be disgusted?

[neepop]

Friend rang me this morning all bright and cheerful.
Told me she placed a order with a online retailer (huge company )
They delivered her order late after paying for next day.
The box arrived all damaged but luckily everything was there.
She contacted customer services and said one item (£20 make up item ) was missing (it wasn't)
So they've refunded her
Aibu to be a bit disgusted ?
Her response was "I'm struggling with money at the minute "

My conclusion would be that she doesn't share my values and I would re evaluate the friendship.

I've never stolen anything in the traditional sense, and I personally wouldn't do what your friend did, but I do think that large online companies already factor in this sort of thing within the business modal and I don't think prices would be necessarily lower if no-one ever stole anything.
Some people lie and cheat, others don't, but it's up to the individual to live the way they deem best.
If a friend behaved in a way I didn't agree with then it would be my decision, depending on how serious I thought it was, whether to continue with the friendship. Personally this wouldn't be a dealbreaker for me, but if asked I'd say I wouldn't have done it.

It would make me look at them differently tbh. Someone at work used to joke about getting free food when doing the self scan anywhere and everytime. To me its stealing but they thought it was normal.

Dress it up anyway you want to yourself, it’s theft.
I’d reevaluate.

That was theft. The OP needs no other explanation for being disgusted.

Other people do it, the government do it, shops price it into their business model - none of this means theft is ok. When it isn’t a matter of survival, choosing to steal or not comes down to values. Mine don’t include theft and I’d be at odds with anyone who could justify this.

It’s true that they agreed to it... on the basis of a lie. I guess we could reframe scammers who talk people out of their savings as “presenting an opportunity” to their victims!

This.

She's not Aladdin.

@zen1 that doesn’t even make sense.

It doesn’t really matter to me who the retailer was or the actual value of the item. It’s straightforward dishonesty and theft, no matter how she tries to dress it up. “Being skint” to justify it won’t wash with me. I’d be reconsidering this friendship

A friend told me they only scan some items through the scan and shop and have never had a thorough check, and it's absolutely disgusted me and made me reconsider the friendship really.

YANBU

Absolutely. People here justifying it saying the shops make plenty of profit so it’s ok. Well no, it isn’t. Because the shops will continue to make their profit by ensuring prices are increased to combat /balance out theft. So other people are paying for it. Yes, someone genuinely hungry I’d not be bothered about. But people who just think they can not scan stuff just to get away with it for the sake of not wanting to pay are wrong.

I can't believe they actually admit to shoplifting. Why do they think it's okay?!

Do people realise that amazon doesn't own the stuff they deliver? They just refund and charge back to whichever small business is selling via their platform.

MN is always very morally relative in my view.

Stealing is stealing, all the way from penny chews upwards.

Even with a cost of living crisis.

I made a genuine mistake once at the self service, I went straight back to the shop and paid for the item I'd missed. I was mortified!

There was a thread a while ago on here that I clicked on about ‘thrifty tips.’ Well, four kids, the economy, I’m always looking for thrifty tips! One of them was ‘use the self scanners and choose less than you have/click on bread rolls when you’re really buying expensive cakes.’ Erm, no, that’s not thrifty - it’s stealing!

You are right

But I would save an emotion as strong as disgust for the government, energy companies, Putin, etc

With your friend I would say, I don’t think you should do that, and move on

@Keyansier

Of course it’s stealing, because it’s based on a lie. The same as if you said something didn’t turn up and they resent it.

Don’t kid yourself.

You might not see it as stealing but stealing is what it is.

If you go into someone's house with a knife, hold it to their throat and 'present them with the opportunity' to hand over their possessions rather than be stabbed, is that okay too.

I work in a supermarket obviously all shoplifting puts prices up for everyone. If someone is genuinely stealing because they or their family are going hungry then I have some sympathy but the items we loose the most on is alcohol, particularly whiskey and champagne.

YANBU - she might be struggling with money therefore she shouldn’t have bought a £20 makeup item (she could probably have gotten similar from a cheaper brand or just done without!)

SIL (DH's sister) used to be thrilled when her £200+ Next deliveries were left on her doorstep instead of in a safe place or with a neighbour. She was telling her other SIL (Her DH's sister) and I about one she'd claimed undelivered and her SIL (who is far more outspoken than I) gave her what for, asking if she really thought that stealing is something you should brag about and finished with, "The time you want to be a thief, don't be telling me about it!"

God I love that woman (SIL's SIL I mean)

The fact it was late after paying for next day delivery and the box damaged means the company should have offered her a partial refund anyway.
I ordered a laptop for my son and it was lost in transit so they sent me another one…3 days later the original showed up. They told me that if it did then I should keep it. Big companies factor loses into their margins. If it was someone big I can’t say I’d get het up over it.

Actually shocked that there are people condoning it and saying they've done or would do the same. You're not Robin Hood. You're not the good guy in this. You're a thief, that's all.