Neighbours complaining about our children in the garden

[Hiccups1]

Just a rant really! We have the most miserable neighbours who moan about anything and everything. Today we’ve had a knock on the door to say our children are to loud in the garden and “is there something wrong with them” 😮 I’m outraged. Ended up shutting the door in their face. I make sure my children are in by 7pm and do not allow them to scream or shout in anger when playing outside otherwise I bring them on. They are 5 and 1 and I cannot believe they had the audacity to say it! Yes they are loud, but it’s laughing and playing. They’ve lived here 40 years and have never had this before apparently. We are not the sort of people who sit all day and night drinking, smoking and blasting music until the early hours. From 7pm you don’t hear a peep from us in the garden. They’ve made me feel incredibly awkward although I know we’ve done nothing wrong, what would they prefer my children say inside all day? The kids aren’t even in the garden all day every day as we are out and about most days so it’s literally maybe two hours max most days. I’m tempted to knock the door and see what they suggest I do but there is no reasoning with people like that. Thanks for reading 🫣

Not everyone likes other people's noise . If they played ABBA on full blast every day would you be happy . If you have to live on top of each other you have to be respectful of each other and unwanted noise leads to more fall outs than anything else .

You are allowed to live your life. Ignore them, if you are bringing the dc in if they’re loud and doing everything else you say.

@hattie43 The problem with your faintly ridiculous post is what is warranted or defined as “unwanted?”

Do people of a certain age reasonably expect others to have no family life outdoors? None?

and that all gardens should be enjoyed in near silence with murmuring adult voices?

there is no comparison between “ABBA on full blast” and children playing in the summer.

YABVU

Lots of neighbours posts this weekend.

Ignore them

Just ignore them. Do not respond.

They are being ridiculous.

I think they are ridiculous to complain if it's just a couple of hours of the kids playing outside and not every day either.

I'm the first person to get annoyed by a lot of noise whatever it is (dogs barking, loud music or the pillock with the backfiring car) but that's just being over the top nasty.

Ignore. Like you I would just shut the door in their faces, my garden my kids can bloody play in it. Of course I deal with any squabbles and ask them to tone it down if they get too loud, but at the end of the day they are kids. Also like you by 7pm it’s silence in my house, youngest in bed, older ones chilling before bed. I extend the same curtesy to my neighbours, I don’t complain about their dog going nuts howling every time the church bells go (we are within earshot of 3 different churches, so it’s a lot!) or when it barks at everyone who knocks on our door, I don’t complaint about drunken karaoke at all hours from other neighbours, the guy on his skateboard that is constantly zooming up and down at all hours when he’s coming home from god knows where or the other neighbours 4 kids when they come home from uni in summer and take up the entire street with their cars and going in and out of the house at all hours drunk with their mates. So I’d be pissed it they complained about my kids playing in the garden.

If they hate noise then they should move to a field with no neighbours.... or just suck up that people have their own lives to lead - I'd ignore them and tell them it's not unreasonable to use your garden and have child noises at reasonable times of the day

@SavoirFlair

Not ridiculous at all . If people have neighbours some noise is inevitable but 7pm is pretty late to be bringing in 5 and 1 yrs olds . It sounds like the neighbours have had quiet neighbours previously so this new family would be disruptive .

Very glad I don't have neighbours .

Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat?
It's a GARDEN.. that's what gardens are FOR!
The miserable old gits. Let the kids play. Most old folk love listening to them.

It is normal noise in normal hours. They need to live with it.

Ignore them fgs.

I'm sure at 5 and 1 they're not screaming all day if at all.

I'm sitting in my garden listening to two types of foreign music, another home is playing love tunes arranging a barbecue, DC are giggling laughing and enjoying the sun from different back yards.

It's a fine safe day to be alive. ✨️

You know that your DC are in at a reasonable time.

I'd shut the door in her face too.

Ignore the wankers. It’ll soon be dark and cold so let your kids enjoy their own bloody garden while they can.

I don’t think you’re being unreasonable, but I don’t think many of us old ones like listening to them either. We’re just being polite.

They have taken the trouble to knock on your door to complain, suggesting that your children's noise is more obtrusive than you think. You've said yourself that they are loud.

I quite like to hear children playing but I cannot abide screaming and shrieking, especially when it just goes on and on. The fact that you've said you don't allow them to scream "in anger" suggests to me that you think any other sort of screaming is OK. It really isn't.

You've decided that your neighbours are the issue and you are going to ignore them, so why post? I suspect that you actually realise deep down that you are in the wrong here, and just want everyone to agree with you.

We can't tell whether YABU because we can't hear the noise. Perhaps you could think about making sure that their play doesn't include any screaming at all, and at least you've made an effort. Or you could go and confront your neighbours and listen to their complaint. It could well be justified.

My sibling and I learnt how to play quietly in the garden. There were consequences for shrieking. We simply were not allowed to play loudly because my neighbours were considerate towards their neighbours. They would have been mortified and apologetic had their neighbours come to complain, not outraged.

Thanks all for your responses. To the few who don’t agree I can appreciate your comments but understand that I am always conscious of the noise level my children make purely because I know how difficult my neighbours can be and I’m not one to just be that nuisance neighbour who is disrespectful. We moved here last year and a few balls went over into there garden, we had a knock on the door several times about her annoyance of this so I simply don’t let my children throw or play with balls in the garden so I’m not completely unreasonable! If I can’t stop them going over the fence when my then four year old was playing with them I didn’t let him play with them in the garden! Some would say I was ridiculous but I tried to be reasonable so this just feels like a vendetta and they wont be happy until the kids are inside.

If the kids are just playing then YANBU but if they are shrieked then I understand how it could be taxing - not sure how you’d stop it though, especially in the 1 year old

Oh, come on. We're talking about children here; they're just playing. And 7pm sounds more than reasonable.

OP, I'm sorry that you have such miserable neighbours. I don't have any children and love to see my 'boyfriend' next door - 18 months old - running all over my garden. He's gorgeous. His dad cut my lawn yesterday while I was at the footie so I'm off out to get them a little something.

I love my neighbours. They are moving somewhere bigger soon and I'm really going to miss them 😪

I think we're all glad that you don't have neighbours 😮

@SweetSenorita

What , because I'm respectful of people . Yes some of the responses on this thread clearly indicate that is a lost trait .

Is it normal playing chatter and laughter or is it actual shrieking?

Post some ear plugs through their front door! If they don't like it they could block it out but the sound of children playing (and laughter) is a joy!

Send the kids to theirs, or put them over the fence for a day and see how quiet they can keep them! Then complain about the noise lol.

Do not allow any neighbour to bully you or rule the road. As long as you are considerate (as you appear to be), it is life.

Squealing and screaming is something I don't like at all. But kids having fun and making a racket, ok by me. Are yours high pitched screamers?

Have to admit, we have neighbours a few houses over from ours and they have young kids. They are in the garden all the time and it's the dad that annoys me with his booming voice and music on (I think he thinks the whole neighbourhood wants to listen to it). My kids are older but hardly ever went in the garden anyway as we were often out.

I do find them noisy at times but they're kids and it's expected. I am planning on moving to a field soon anyway 😂