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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Neighbours complaining about our children in the garden

119 replies

Hiccups1 · 21/08/2022 13:26

Just a rant really! We have the most miserable neighbours who moan about anything and everything. Today we’ve had a knock on the door to say our children are to loud in the garden and “is there something wrong with them” 😮 I’m outraged. Ended up shutting the door in their face. I make sure my children are in by 7pm and do not allow them to scream or shout in anger when playing outside otherwise I bring them on. They are 5 and 1 and I cannot believe they had the audacity to say it! Yes they are loud, but it’s laughing and playing. They’ve lived here 40 years and have never had this before apparently. We are not the sort of people who sit all day and night drinking, smoking and blasting music until the early hours. From 7pm you don’t hear a peep from us in the garden. They’ve made me feel incredibly awkward although I know we’ve done nothing wrong, what would they prefer my children say inside all day? The kids aren’t even in the garden all day every day as we are out and about most days so it’s literally maybe two hours max most days. I’m tempted to knock the door and see what they suggest I do but there is no reasoning with people like that. Thanks for reading 🫣

OP posts:

vodkaredbullgirl · 21/08/2022 18:15

My ndn kids can be annoying, when playing footie in the garden. I'm in my 50's I could moan about them, but I just shut the door and ignore them.

hattie43 · 21/08/2022 18:18

wb3 · 21/08/2022 18:12

It is totally possible for anybody to pass any kind of judgement on who.is right and who is wrong.

You saying my kids and not shouting and shrieking means nothing.

Your neighbour claiming they are means nothing.

To make a judgement, you would have to live next door and actually hear the noise.

However, this is MN so everyone feels qualified to judge even though nobody is.

I can't believe how nasty some people are in this thread , it's clearly society is degenerating . All these ageist threads for everyone one of you who has lost someone young I bet they all wished they'd had the chance to grow old , let's hope you do to and then we'll revisit how you feel about the next generations lack of care / consideration for you . I don't get why it's such an alien concept for people to want peace in their own home .

SuperNoodle87 · 21/08/2022 18:19

Wish my neighbours were courteous enough to bring their kids in at 7pm, instead of starting up the power saw and the dance music at 10.30pm while the kids are still screeching on the trampoline. YANBU.

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL · 21/08/2022 18:21

Wtf?

sunglassesonthetable · 21/08/2022 18:25

I can't believe how nasty some people are in this thread , it's clearly society is degenerating .

"clearly " doing a lot of heavy lifting here.

The neighbour threads always bingo into the 'break down of society'

We're talking about a 5 year old and a 1 year old who are in by 7pm. 🙄

Smileyoriley · 21/08/2022 18:29

I'm old and definitely team "ignore them"
There are miserable gits in every age group sadly. Your children will never get a second crack at growing up and have every right to enjoy playing in the garden and yes, God forbid, making a bit of noise.

UWhatNow · 21/08/2022 18:35

“I can't believe how nasty some people are in this thread , it's clearly society is degenerating . All these ageist threads for everyone one of you who has lost someone young I bet they all wished they'd had the chance to grow old , let's hope you do to and then we'll revisit how you feel about the next generations lack of care / consideration for you . I don't get why it's such an alien concept for people to want peace in their own home .”

I agree. What a vile ageist thread. And as for you @LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL I’m so glad I don’t live next door to someone as pedantic and lacking in empathy as you.

TamzinGrey · 21/08/2022 18:41

I actually enjoy the sound of the 2 year old next door to me giggling and squealing in their garden.
On the other hand, the sound of extremely loud Performing Daddy really grates on my nerves. They're out there now. Little one has a new baby trampoline and is loving it, bless her. Unfortunately Daddy is shouting his head off with excitement. He might as well have a megaphone.
I was enjoying sitting in my garden but am about to go in now and shut all of the doors and windows.
People can be so inconsiderate.

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL · 21/08/2022 18:48

UWhatNow · 21/08/2022 18:35

I agree. What a vile ageist thread. And as for you @LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL I’m so glad I don’t live next door to someone as pedantic and lacking in empathy as you.

@UWhatNow that post was completely irrelevant to OPs issue!

Very sad, but not relevant!

vivainsomnia · 21/08/2022 18:49

I don't understand the 'its ok because they are in at 7pm'. Does this mean that the neighbour are only allowed to use their garden after 7pm because it's otherwise too noisy for them to enjoy their own garden?

Who wants to wait until 7pm when the sun is almost gone and it gets cold anyway?

What is so wrong about compromising? Your children shouldn't be disturbing them so much they can't enjoy their garden before 7pm just as it would be unreasonable for them to mow their lawn at 6am in the morning even if they are up and it would be a good time for them.

People shouldn't have to feel constantly stressed in their home because neighbours are disrespectful of the impact their noise their family make.

I very much doubt it's just a bit of gentle laughing and talking. Parents can become very used to their kids crying, shrieking, loudly fighting or arguing.

They to respect how much it affects them just as they respect you and don't make horrendous noise when your kids have just gone to sleep.

sunglassesonthetable · 21/08/2022 18:56

Does this mean that the neighbour are only allowed to use their garden after 7pm because it's otherwise too noisy for them to enjoy their own garden?

They "can't use their garden " because of a 5 year old and a 1 year old playing? ????

Seriously?

Londonderry34 · 21/08/2022 19:04

7pm? Let them play on. Let them live, be happy and joyful. It's not midnight.

Jimmyneutronsforehead · 21/08/2022 19:38

I think it depends on what noise your kids are making.

The kid next door to us just shrieks and screams HELP ME HELP ME!!!

There's literally never anything wrong with him, and we can see him, but other neighbours can't, and nobody can enjoy being in the garden when that's going on because you never know if it's a real cry for help, or shriek of pain, or whether it's just a kid in the garden playing in a way he doesn't understand is alarming for others.

If your kids are just giggly and happy and aren't loud or piercing then crack on, otherwise if they're excessive just try and teach them to be a bit quieter or redirect them when they become overly excited.

Original poster

Hiccups1 · 22/08/2022 12:05

Ive had some giggles with the responses on here. Thank you all. We are not unreasonable neighbours and my children are not screaming and shrieking for hours when they are in the garden. Like I said it’s normally for two hours max a day they are out there playing and not every day. I have accepted they are miserable and being unreasonable. Spoke to our other next door neighbour last night and she said it was a joy hearing our children playing in the garden. I think the approach is what has got our back up more and asking if there was something wrong with them. If there was does that make it acceptable? If they had knocked the door and said look I’m sorry but the noise is a bit much some times I’d of absolutely apologised and said I will make sure they tone it down a notch if it’s bothering you. I would like to think our children are polite and well behaved so can only assume they think they are unruly and we have no control over them, the one year olds behaviour is questionable at times 😂🫣.

OP posts:

mamabear715 · 22/08/2022 13:54

@Hiccups1 Of course you're not unreasonable!
I would totally agree with your other ndn. Won't be too much summer left now, let your little ones have the time of their lives! :-)

Bossladywood · 17/06/2023 22:41

7pm late?

Do you really consider that to be too late for children in their own garden?

JudgeRudy · 17/06/2023 23:11

Hmm,I'm on the fence on this one as I think load kids could well be on a parr to listening to Abba. The point is, if you don't particularly like the noise, then if its the loud, intense and going on for a couple of hours a day, its going to be irritating. One man's meat is another man's poison.

Without hearing the noise its hard to say.

AdobeWanKenobi · 17/06/2023 23:14

Bossladywood · 17/06/2023 22:41

7pm late?

Do you really consider that to be too late for children in their own garden?

It’s even later…..around a year late by this point 😂

ZOMBIE THREAD

ZOMBIE THREAD.

Jane203 · 14/08/2025 10:56

I work from home and in the hot weather have the spare bedroom window open where I work. Even with it shut I can hear my neighbours kids. Everything is full volume roaring, screaming yelling and bawling. It’s awful. I can’t sit in my garden. My kids were loud but I encouraged them to consider others around them and to communicate at a lower volume. Kids can have fun laugh and play but tracing them to control volume and be aware of the spaces they share with others means they turn into sociable and nice members of society. Plus my partner who teaches says these sorts of kids are nightmares because what the parents have failed to do is left to teachers to try to fix

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