Would you be happy with your partner sitting on other women's laps?

[Tryingtogetaflatstomach]

And dancing intimately with them at 4am (even if they didn't kiss)
I've read the articles about the Finnish PM. I think it's ridiculous that she's being criticised for going to a nightclub with friends, and enjoying herself. Boris and co have done far worse.
However I do feel a bit bad for her husband. She was caught dancing quite intimately with some hip hop singer and sitting on different men's laps.
How would you feel honestly if your partner did this?

Lose her job for what, attending a party having a dance.

The judgement on this thread is ridiculous

I agree with this.

Boris is a disgrace but it doesn't mean we can't criticise this PM because he was/is worse. And I think we do require world leaders to be dignified. They may all act like this in private. But she needs better friends or not party in public so it is all over the media.

Some posters on here go out of their way to defend behaviour, just because it was a woman

Some posters on here go out of their way to defend behaviour, just because it was a woman

But why is dancing and having fun indefensible?

or undignified?

I think it is totally inappropriate in all kinds of ways but the reality is that politics seems to mostly attract people who act in inappropriate ways. There are really few to no politicians that I think are any kind of role model at all. It doesn't seem that people with integrity or character go into politics. So lap dances and hitting on others and demonstrating a lack of leadership / judgment / morality is really par for the course for a politician.

@Midlifemusings what ways?

Why? Why do we need our world leaders not to party in public? How does this impact on her (excellent) track record of leading her country?

And do you agree that the furore would be nonexistent if she wasn’t a woman? Particularly a young beautiful one?

You think that going out and dancing speaks to this woman’s ‘leadership / judgment / morality’? How, exactly?

Out of interest, do you know anything about Finnish politics, her policies or what she’s achieved? Or is that big of interest? It’s not about what world leaders actually do in terms of leading, it’s about whether they fit neatly into the box of ‘appropriate behaviour’ that you’ve constructed?

I have seen more "intimate dancing" on Strictly, which is considered family entertainment. You can't have it both ways. Also we don't know what kind of relationship she has with the men. Many types of dancing (e g. latin) looks "intimate"

@Cherchezlaspice because they must realise it will be splashed all over the media and used against them by their detractors.

An old and unattractive man would be mocked, And old woman would be laughed at - attractive or not because society is misogynistic

Doesn't stop this woman from using her judgement.

Your only problem with the fact that she went out dancing was that she should have known it would be splashed over the media and therefore shouldn’t have done it? So, you agree that there’s nothing intrinsically wrong with what she’s done?

In that case, opposed to complaining that she didn’t police her behaviour, why aren’t complaining about the media and said detractors using something against her that shouldn’t be ‘used against’ anyone?

No and if she had used better judgement - either where she went or the people she was with - then it wouldn't be in the papers.

And in the current climate with Russia she had to be aware they will pick up on anything

No. You're not dead at 35. Thankfully the Finnish are less uptight than us.

And a young attractive man (which is what a direct swap would be) would be lauded. Because, as you say, society is misogynistic. Why are you bemoaning her lack of ‘judgement’ in refusing to abide by misogynistic rules, as opposed to bemoaning the misogyny?

I think it is infantilising too say this woman shouldn't have to make a judgment because of the media being sexist and repugnant.

We all have to make judgements. My friend is a teacher in a secondary and keeps her SM accounts private and doesn't go out drinking in the same area as the school

Oh fuck off!

We all have to make judgements. My friend is a teacher in a secondary and keeps her SM accounts private and doesn't go out drinking in the same area as the school

so the problem isn't going out & drinking it's doing it in the same area?

No and if she had used better judgement - either where she went or the people she was with - then it wouldn't be in the papers.

So the issue is not the behaviour but because it's been made public? I honestly don't understand that logic that pretending something doesn't happen is morally better 😆

Of course.

And the Finnish PM should have made a better judgement where she went and/or who she was with. Because then it wouldn't be all over the media

It is not ‘infantilising’ to bemoan the toxic patriarchal structures as opposed to judging and condemning people for not toeing the line satisfactorily. But, you don’t want to do that. You’re not complaining about societal toxicity or the inequitable treatment of female public figures, your issue is that this woman didn’t have the ‘judgement’ to toe the line to your satisfaction.

You are saying ‘society is misogynistic, you most operate within the strictures of this misogyny and if you don’t, you have poor judgement’. That is internalised misogyny and the sort of attitude that has been used to keep women in line and safely in their place for time immemorial.

That's it's illogical because you are saying there is nothing wrong with the behaviour & the issue is that it's in the media.

I know plenty of teachers that don't drive miles to have a drink, it's not an issue because drinking isn't illegal or immoral.

I was replying to @Livpool

You are saying ‘society is misogynistic, you most operate within the strictures of this misogyny and if you don’t, you have poor judgement’.

absolutely, it's so depressing.