To ask your best parenting tips

[Guru30]

Anything you have picked up on along the way, hacks etc to make life easier with young kids?

Take snacks, drinks, spare clothes, nappies, wipes etc absolutely everywhere you go with them, even if you're only planning on popping out for 2 minutes.

Take toys if you're planning on being away from home for more than half hour (unless at a soft play or park etc).

When potty training, always take a travel potty/wee bottle with you.

Basically, be prepared for all possible outcomes whenever you leave the house!! Good organisation is the key to success when taking toddlers anywhere.

(I have a 2 year old and 3 year old, so it can be a struggle tbh).

My kids are 2,1 and third is due in December!

Have a mini nappy bag that stays in the car! It's been a god send on those trips were I've forgotten the actual nappy bag!

Backpack reins on a child as soon as they start to want to walk and not go in the buggy. My DD now reminds me to put them on if I forget 😂

TV isn't the enemy, but it's also not a third parent! We watch a lot of tv, but it's together and we have the subtitles on and talk about what we're watching, DD is very advanced in her speech now according to the health visitor.

Find a small activity that your child enjoys as a distraction when out and about. DD for example loves her word flash cards, so we have a pack in the nappy bag, any time I see a melt down coming, we whip them out and go through them and 9 times out of 10 it distracts her from whatever she was getting upset about.

Buggy boards with a seat are a god send for stubborn toddlers that won't go in the buggy anymore because they're 'big now!' 😂 but you still need one for a younger sibling.

Carabiner clips on the buggy! Baskets underneath aren't always big enough!

Drinks and snacks stash EVERYWHERE! In the house, nappy bag, pushchair, car, handbag! Never ever run out of snacks! 😂

Take a notebook and pen everywhere as a distraction/entertainment option!

The best thing I've learnt is to remember, as silly as it sounds, that they're real little people with very real feelings. However irrational or silly the things that upset them feels to us, rightly or wrongly, the feelings for them are genuine, real and valid. Bearing that in mind doesn't mean I give in to them all the time (e.g having a meltdown over a red cup rather than blue), but it helps me to have more compassion and kindness when dealing with it before getting frustrated. A tagline I like from Instagram somewhere says something like, "all feelings are valid, but not all behaviours". So you can hold boundaries while still empathising with the feeling.

I'm not sure I've explained that well but it's made a huge difference with my very wilful second child!!

Don't sweat the small stuff and pick your battles, so your 2 year old wants an ice lolly with breakfast this morning, go for it, sometimes it's not worth the screaming match!

Take others advice with a pinch of salt, they all mean well but nothing beats parental instinct so trust your gut.

Take snacks everywhere, when you think you have plenty then pack more. Same with nappies and spare clothes.

I always take a set of childrens cutlery in DDs bag now she's old enough to use it, you never know when you might stop somewhere for a bite to eat and very few places actually have small cutlery.

When you’ve figured out the things that matter to you, both personally and with regards parenting standards and choices, priorities them. Give everything that doesn’t matter so much permission to slide. Trying to do everything to perfection has the potential to lead to burnout.

Don't worry about "making memories" for your DC when they're toddlers!! When they are teenagers they will look at you blankly when you say "remember when ...?".

Loiter at bedtime. It's amazing how much extra information they suddenly remember about their say to chat about with you when that alternative is the light out. Actually quite bonding.

In the same vein, don't always have music on in the car when driving with them, captive child in a car will often open up about all sorts!

Teach your children to take their socks of the right way round so not inside out, it will save hours of your life down the line especially if you have a few kids.

Routine routine routine!

Not mine, I saw it somewhere, but it definitely works. Those days where everyone seems to be on edge, the kids are wound up, everyone is at the end of their tether... fresh air or water will sort them out.

Cranky newborn - a quick walk in the sling or a bath together.

A cheeky toddler - a run around the park or a quick bath.

A gobby 6 year old 😂 - a scoot to the shop for an ice lolly.

It works wonders. My two are 3 and 6, even on the most challenging days, a walk is always a good way to calm everyone down.

Watch Bluey ... best thing ever for both parents and kids. You'll learn loads

@Twizbe that's much better than my advice!

Bloody love Bluey! Such a good programme, loving series 3 on Disney+.

Add water to make things better.
A drink, and playing with water in garden, bath, swimming, in a container is nearly 100% guaranteed to make a happy child.

Stop drinking alcohol. It helps you manage the difficult times with kids. Honest. I swear by it

@elvislives2012 OMG I think I'd say the opposite 😂

I agree with this, just pick your battles otherwise you will be exhausted. It’s meant I’ve had more energy to toughen up on the parts I’ve felt important.

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 I used to too. Then stopped drinking and realised that things were hard because I drank too much. Course if you don't tear the ass from it like I did then no problem!

'I'm sorry, I know you are trying to tell me something really important but I can't hear your words, take a deep breath and try again' repeat until calm...... (make sure you remember to listen to their words tho or it blows up!!!)

Manage your own expectations and learn the beauty of natural consequences. Toddler doesn't want to wear a coat?
Option A - try to negotiate/put coat on while toddler screams like they are being murdered
Option B - take coat with u and if/when they get cold they can wear it.

Following

I have a DS (2) who is testing at times and baby no2 on the way so I'd love to know from those more experienced!

My parenting tip:
Options - 'do you want to walk up the stairs or shall I carry you' 'do you want to read 1 book before bed, or would you like to go straight to sleep'

I feel like sometimes my DS will react better when I give him options that work in both our favour (although he does lie to me when he promises he'll go to sleep after one book! Toddlers hey 😂)

Try to see things from their perspective. Also, assume positive intent. Sometimes we can get caught up in something being naughty and just focus on that, feel hard done by and not actually wonder why the child is doing something. I asked today and found out that my 3yo was drawing on the table (which I was cross about and he knows not to do) because he wanted a larger space to draw. With this info I was able to offer him an A3 drawing pad, which we actually ended up masking-taping 3 sheets of paper together and he ended up doing a really interesting drawing which I wouldn't have seen if I'd simply have treated that as disobedience. OK, it would have been better if he'd asked for a larger piece of paper to begin with, but he's 3 so his foresight and impulse control isn't quite there yet. We got there in the end and I expect (from past experience) he would ask first next time.

Confidence is key to a lot of things. The more confident you are the more they will pick up on that.

Ignore all the advice, you'll find a way of doing things that works for you.

Follow through. Every time.

A small one, but if you peel the negative space off a sheet of stickers, toddlers can get the stickers off themselves. Saves a lot of frustration.

Don't stress