To ask your best parenting tips

[Guru30]

Anything you have picked up on along the way, hacks etc to make life easier with young kids?

If there’s something you’re likely to say yes to, say it straight away- what’s the point in dragging it out and debating if you’re ultimately going to say yes? Same as if you know it’s going to be a no, get it said straight away. Clear and concise.

If you're going to give in, give in quickly.

Hah, cross post!

Yes 😂🙌🏻

Getting out the house can feel like a mission BUT it is almost always worth making the effort and even an hour or two out can make everyone feel much better. Utilise free or low cost places - library, museums, parks etc and get good at packing picnics to stretch the day out a bit further!

Encourage reading and exercise. Spend time with your DCs.

Reading is obviously good for entertainment but it also helps kids maximise their academic potential in both English and maths.

Exercise - fun and vital for good mental and physical health. Gives you confidence, an opportunity to make friends etc etc

Spend time - no matter what age your DCs are they want and need your time and attention. I played board gameS with my DCs aged 18 and 20 today.

Just wait and the magic happens.

A month ago I would have sworn our little boy was entirely without imagination. He is engine obsessed. Then something clicks overnight and now he pretends he is an engine, or an aeroplane, or earlier today, a jacket potato.

You could miss a lot of loveliness by anticipating, rather than just kicking back and accepting the next bit will happen when it is meant to. It's the evolution that is glorious.

I know it might seem very basic, but when it’s all getting too much, I remove myself from the situation completely, take a few deep breaths and basically get a grip! It’s so easy to feel dragged down by the moaning and get drawn into discussions that aren’t going anywhere (I’m thinking 6+ year olds here).

Don't empty a potty outside on a windy day! 👍

Never make an empty threat or an empty promise

Pick your battles
Are they unsafe?
Eg. If LO insists on wearing wellies in summer... Let them.

If they want to take their sandwich apart and eat the filling and bread separately... Let them.

If they want to not hold hands crossing the road... This is the "battle" you fight.

Give choices within limits
Toddlers...let them choose between shorts or leggings today . Let them pick whatever flavour ice-cream they want from the 2/3 you've pointed out. Let them choose between going to the park or going to the woods.

Keeps everything in order and as it should be, but gives them control in their lives. Helps with the tantrums in general

Don't believe toddlers when they say they don't like a certain food
If you present them with cherry tomatoes on their plate for lunch that they happily devoured yesterday and they declare "I don't like tomatoes". Don't believe them. They mean "they don't want tomatoes right now". So don't then permanently remove tomatoes from the diet!

Accept that you have the kids you have, not the kids you thought you would have.

Get over yourself and all of the pretentious twaddle you've told yourself about the parent you will be.

Practice your poker face cos you're gonna need it when your child starts waffling on about minecraft/pokemon/some game that is like Minecraft but underwater.

Make bedtime easy. Small children love the security of familiar soothing routine and it helps them settle quickly

Establish a regular wind-down routine for the end of the day (tea, bath, pyjamas, story, milk, goodnight to teddies, bed) in which everything happens the same predictable way every day. The curtains are closed, the same snuggle, same words , tuck up etc. Quiet and calm.

Be consistent.

When they start to rebel against the consistent boundaries you've set, think carefully about whether those boundaries are still appropriate, and widen them if you can. Explain what the new rules are. And again, be consistent with the new rules.

You're the grown-up. You're the boss, so act like one. Don't let them rule the roost.

Oh yes, and don't sweat the small stuff.

Children mimic the behaviour they see
Stay calm
Stay patient
Set a good example
Don't shout
Treat them with respect
Kids have bad days too
Eat meals together
Have fun

I always give my son choices, but both options suit me fine.

For example. 'Do you want to have a small splash of milk on your cereal, or a big splash?'

Either way he has milk on his cereal. 👍

"I don't like [food X]."
"I am not giving it to you so that you like it now, I am giving it to you so you'll enjoy it when you're big."

Always take water, and tissues or wipes with you. Also change. Pick your battles and learn to slow down.

Great advice 💯

Children often talk best about troubles when doing something else. Especially if you are driving them. Never give up the opportunity to give teenagers a lift somewhere, it's during quiet driving they will confide in you.

Equally, with the confiding at bedtime thing, if they suddenly say they are scared of ants, they are probably just trying to piss you about.

This is a really good one actually. Thank you.

If they're crying take them for a walk or put them in the bath.

LIFE CHANGING

Never battle with an overtired child. Usually if they're overtired it's the parents fault anyway so it's not overly fair (stretched them too long, skipped the nap for a day trip etc...). I just kill with kindness and get them in bed ASAP.

Be consistent. The hardest and most dull part of parenting.

Distraction can do wonders. Distraction can work wonders for tantrums and snapping them out of bad moods. It still works on my 7 yo!