Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Partner wants me to pay for his car when he’s working full time

110 replies

PinkBump2022 · 14/08/2022 14:19

So me and my partner both work. I have my own business and we use universal credit to top up. Before my partner went back to work after being on the sick we were just on universal credit and my business was just starting. We used the universal credit to pay for his car and I have always used my money to pay for my own car. We live together and have a child and another one due very soon. So now my partner is back at work full time earning £850 a week, he still wants me to use the universal credit to pay for his car, this goes in my bank to top up my wages and Iv been using it for our child’s needs, food, and buying baby things. So now after giving him the money for his car (£420 a month finance) and £170 insurance, it’s joint insurance and it’s high because he got points for speeding twice in 1 year. I’m left with not enough to buy the bouncy chair, swing, or crib. However he’s got two accounts with a fair amount in each.

am I wrong for saying He should be paying for his car now he’s earning more than enough! We do drive each other’s cars and are on each other’s insurance. But I pay my own car and own insurance I’d never ask him to pay my insurance even though he drives my car all of the time, and I pay my own fiancé which is not even half of what his is! He knows we need this baby things and hasn’t even offered to buy anything and he knows our child still needs uniform and hasn’t offered to buy these either, even when I said oh I don’t get paid again until a week before he goes to school and that’s leaving it a little late to get the rest of the uniform as it may be sold out then.
i don’t know if I’m just super hormonal or if he’s just being very greedy with his money!

OP posts:
SlouchingTowardsBethlehemAgain · 14/08/2022 14:35

Cocklodger alert.

Meraas · 14/08/2022 14:36

I struggle to believe any of this, but on the 1st chance it’s true, no, don't pay for his car.

IncompleteSenten · 14/08/2022 14:36

Will you even still get UC? You've informed them of his income I assume? They know you're a couple? So it's a joint claim?

You need to ensure everything is updated because otherwise they will want it back.

But no, yanbu. His car, his bill.

Creepymanonagoatfarm · 14/08/2022 14:36

And 2 hefty bank accounts?
Got to be a joke.

Anniefrenchfry · 14/08/2022 14:38

The only way I can see this to be right is if you’re committing benefit fraud. If it’s paying for his car and would pay for all the other stuff then it’s over 400 a month. Have you said he doesn’t live with you or not declared his earnings?

SizzlingAwayIntheHotSun · 14/08/2022 14:40

Claiming benefits with an income of 45k plus your earnings, has someone been telling porkies on the UC forms 🤥? I think you are cheeky for commiting benefit fraud and using benefits you shouldn't be claiming to fund expensive cars.

Runwalkskijump · 14/08/2022 14:41

PinkBump2022 · 14/08/2022 14:23

@1FootInTheRave I have no idea our rent is high because we have an adapted home because I have a disabled child….. my partner has a disability which effects him working. So we don’t get much. But that wasn’t my question at all

His disability means nothing. Lots of people with disabilities don't get UC. It isn't effecting his ability to work that much if he is getting that a week.

So he is on 45k plus a year plus your wage and you get UC 🤔

BruceAndNosh · 14/08/2022 14:42

You're not paying for his car.
WE are.

Imthedamnfoolwhoshothim · 14/08/2022 14:42

I am choosing to belive there are women this thick anymore.

Meltingsocks · 14/08/2022 14:43

I think OP meant disability benefits rather than UC.

But yes OP, this cocklosger is draining you dry, kick him out

Thefruitbatdancer · 14/08/2022 14:43

Isn't that fraud you owning a business, him earning £850 per week and claiming UC? I'd be saving money to pay back the benefits you owe when they catch up with you.

Louise0701 · 14/08/2022 14:44

YABU to be bringing another child into this mess.

redskyatnight · 14/08/2022 14:44

Stop focusing on the car. Look at all the bills that your household jointly has and agree a fair split based on both of your incomes. Or have a joint account.
Don't you have the baby stuff from having our first child? If you gave it away (or whatever) worth seeing if you can get it back or get some free off Freegle - baby stuff is often very cheap/free to obtain!

SizzlingAwayIntheHotSun · 14/08/2022 14:44

BruceAndNosh · 14/08/2022 14:42

You're not paying for his car.
WE are.

This is a very good point 😆, yeah I don't want to fund his car, tell him we say no.

Decompressingmama3 · 14/08/2022 14:44

Absolutely furious at this thread tbh. I'm a single parent who works full time and receive zero recourse to public funds because my salary is high enough not to qualify but low enough to still be struggling day to day..
Livid you use your UC to pay for a financed car.
You're what is wrong with the benefits system.

Crikeyalmighty · 14/08/2022 14:45

There is no way you are entitled to UC OP if you have given correct figures here so the answer becomes moot and I say this as a social minded person. You are either not declaring his earnings, declaring massively under this or not declaring he lives with you- which is benefit fraud.

NippyWoowoo · 14/08/2022 14:46

Is this a wind up?

Weemummykay · 14/08/2022 14:47

1FootInTheRave · 14/08/2022 14:20

How are you getting uc when he's earning 850 quid a week?

This is what I was wondering to. Am currently on mat leave and get £312 a fortnight and only get £190 top up from UC. Me and OH don’t live together as we get on better not being under each other constantly but he come every day after work to help with our 2ds and stays on weekends, still helps pay for shopping(as he should because he has dinner here every night and a big appetite)and stuff for the kids. When kids needs anything I’ll order and pay then TELL oh ur due me such n such for this or tht

mummymeister · 14/08/2022 14:49

well it wont be long before one of the red tops gets hold of this story will it! What the OP is actually saying is that she hasnt declared cocklodger is living at her address so is still claiming as if he wasnt. which is great isnt it? I mean, benefit fraud is a victimless crime. its not as if its taking money from other areas of society like health oh wait....

NippyWoowoo · 14/08/2022 14:49

Decompressingmama3 · 14/08/2022 14:44

Absolutely furious at this thread tbh. I'm a single parent who works full time and receive zero recourse to public funds because my salary is high enough not to qualify but low enough to still be struggling day to day..
Livid you use your UC to pay for a financed car.
You're what is wrong with the benefits system.

Don't waste your time getting wound up by it. Bet it will be sapped soon, if you catch my drift...

This is what encourages these 'types' of posters, the ease with which they are able to induce frothing rage

Runwalkskijump · 14/08/2022 14:52

Meltingsocks · 14/08/2022 14:43

I think OP meant disability benefits rather than UC.

But yes OP, this cocklosger is draining you dry, kick him out

Well then it is his benefit not hers and it is to go towards things he needs for his disability ie a car.

Hankunamatata · 14/08/2022 14:57

Surely you add both incomes together, work out all the outgoings inc savings each then split what's left as spending money each.

djdkdkddkek · 14/08/2022 14:58

I also appreciate the speed with which he was “on the sick” to earning 850 a week.
absolute fucking freeloaders

wapdl · 14/08/2022 14:58

Decompressingmama3 · 14/08/2022 14:44

Absolutely furious at this thread tbh. I'm a single parent who works full time and receive zero recourse to public funds because my salary is high enough not to qualify but low enough to still be struggling day to day..
Livid you use your UC to pay for a financed car.
You're what is wrong with the benefits system.

It's designed to make you feel this way, some people get off on trying to wind people up - just look at the positing history

girlmom21 · 14/08/2022 14:58

Well then it is his benefit not hers and it is to go towards things he needs for his disability ie a car.

I think it might be the money they get for the child - which would be pretty shitty to spend on a car