To physically restrain DD6

[Earringsallstuck]

I'm horrified to have typed that.

She had her ears pierced last month and one of them is infected. It's getting worse and she won't let me clean it, just screams hysterically and flails so I can't get at her.

It doesn't hurt; she has told me so. But she's scared to touch it herself or have me touch it.

I am using antiseptic spray on it which is hopefully helping, but it's starting to look really grim.

WIBU to physically restrain her so that her dad can clean her ear? And if not, what the hell should I do? She's a very sensitive child and I don't want to lose her trust but we have to do something soon.

And for anyone who says that we should never have got her ears pierced, I certainly did it against my better judgement and am now thoroughly regretting it.

Really relieved for your DD she is being assessed shortly. Hopefully she will be treated quickly and home to recover.

See it as a learning curve as a parent. None of us are perfect! It's okay to say NO sometimes when they want something.

Cooled boiled salt water is best put some in a spray bottle and pour some over it in the bath. I would get her seen by a doctor though if she has a temperature.

Hope it goes ok at the hospital OP. Infected piercings suck!

When I had my first baby in a Med country my friends were appalled that her ears hadn't been pierced in hospital!

I hope you get seen quickly, @Earringsallstuck - you’re in the right place.

Glad you getting seen
Dh needs to understand an infection can be serious

I am sure her DH will be acutely aware of this now and have learned something from this evening.

I'm glad you managed to get her to hospital, good luck OP - I hope she gets better soon

@Earringsallstuck
Don’t feel bad at allowing your Daughter to have her ears pierced.
loads of girls want them done.
I expect it does hurt your daughter, hence her flapping when you get near her.

Definitely seek medical advice as PP said.

My son as a teenager was adamant he wanted a pierced ear, and I did it myself with a sterile hypodermic needle, a swab and a sterilised gold stud with well scrubbed hands.
It didn’t get infected, but he was very good with aftercare.
Still has a tiny ring in there.

It was interesting to read on here of a PP who said “ Hollow needle” -Hypodermic- are better than solid ones for piercing.

Best of luck

Hope it gets sorted at the hospital 🤞
I had my ears piercered at 18 (just personal choice, I would have been able to get them done way sooner if I’d wanted) and one got infected and the whole lobe closed around it. I went to the GP and they had to cut it out with a scalpel. It was an interesting experience to say the least....! Just sharing as I know some people are being a bit judgey about getting a 6 year olds ears pierced but an infection can literally happen at any age. Don’t be too hard on yourself OP.

Hope you get seen quickly op.

Remove earrings and get her to a doctor. A 6 year old doesn’t need pierced ears

@sunsetsandsandybeaches

I didn’t disagree with the following posts I just advised in the meantime whilst awaiting medical advice. Obviously with a fever she needed to see someone as soon as possible.

I have read that link. It does advise soaking a pad in warm water and holding it against the ear for a granuloma which is trapped fluid due to an infection. I also happened to take my own GPs advice on my daughters infection which certainly wasn’t that mild considering most of the back was practically swallowed up by the lobe.

Salt water instantly reduced the swelling and it goes without saying you would wash your hands etc before even attempting to touch an infected piercing.

OP glad you’ve took her, no more piercings in the future my DD now to sticks to clip ons. Let us know how you get on.

Perhaps because said child can't deal with the aftercare! I mean how obvious do you want it to be???

Only way to get them pierced is with a needle. No real aftercare needed because of the non butterfly piercing. They only do 11 plus. For an obvious reason.

Good luck OP and please try not to take the judgy comments too much to heart

Glad you got help op.I’ve been sat on by my mum for my own safety before.I still love her more than the world lol. But I get it.
mine rhing that helped us was letting her do whatever you want to on your or daddy first.so she clean your ears or dads.dad might be easier because he could be silly pretending to have pierced ears.
then show her and let her do what you’d do with the cotton cleaner etc.let her see it’s safe.
I imagine the other ailments were making her mind fog and think in irrational hyped up fear too.nothing makes us more aggrieved and anxious than feeling under the weather with fever symptoms.
remember like a puppy to reward and praise her when she has been seen to tonight.let her see she’s brave and also done the right thing and it’s all actually ok.

Hope it's sorted quickly now that you're in A&E.

It's not judgy. Its complete exasperation. Look at the ops position!! It's not ideal is it?

Yet some of you refuse to see it. Even the op regrets it's. Just wait till your kids can have a needle instead of a stupid gun. Why is that an issue?

My 12 year old can have as many percings as she likes. As long as the professional piercer says yes. My 6 year old can't. She can dye her hair. Paint her nails. That's all she needs.

I'm really glad you've got some treatment underway. I hope it resolved quickly for her.

I'm really glad you've gone to the hospital, and I hope she feels better soon!

Just want to comment re your husband not wanting to bother anyone. As a hcp I can assure you we want to be bothered!! If you have a health concern, especially regarding a child, bother away! Out of hours services exist for a reason. As many others have said, infections can get nasty quickly. You don’t want to take chances with something like this. I’m glad you are now being seen. In future, skip mumsnet and just phone 111.

You've done the right thing and going to the hospital may be a lesson to her in future to let you treat other things a bit easier (grazes, splinters etc.)

Yet some of you refuse to see it. Even the op regrets it's. Just wait till your kids can have a needle instead of a stupid gun. Why is that an issue?

OP hasn't said they were pierced with a gun?

Hope she’s ok, Op.

One thing you can try ( nurse here and we often do this in A&E) get DH to wrap her in a sheet or thin blanket so her arms aren’t flailing around. Dad holds her face up to his face - that way he can gently talk to her, hold her face still and reassure her whilst you sort her piercing out. Yes she will cry but hopefully you can do it quickly as DD will be more controlled. Good luck. Otherwise a visit to A&E is called for.