To physically restrain DD6

[Earringsallstuck]

I'm horrified to have typed that.

She had her ears pierced last month and one of them is infected. It's getting worse and she won't let me clean it, just screams hysterically and flails so I can't get at her.

It doesn't hurt; she has told me so. But she's scared to touch it herself or have me touch it.

I am using antiseptic spray on it which is hopefully helping, but it's starting to look really grim.

WIBU to physically restrain her so that her dad can clean her ear? And if not, what the hell should I do? She's a very sensitive child and I don't want to lose her trust but we have to do something soon.

And for anyone who says that we should never have got her ears pierced, I certainly did it against my better judgement and am now thoroughly regretting it.

Bless her. Ice cream, chocolate, sweets. Bribery in this case is your friend.

Plenty of salt water, cooled boiled water.
You just need to talk her down calmly. Easier said than done, of course.

If she's unwell, 111 and get her seen. They're always better at treating children than we are.

Ignore the " 6 is too young bridgade "
She's going to be fine, she was clearly ok going through the process and she will be okay now.
My girls have been 6/7 and always on their request. It's 4 weeks of bathing and she will be fine.
Get her checked out, put your mind at rest!

@Earringsallstuck It's understandable, tbh, so many girls have their ears pierced it seems really simple, until it's your kid and you wonder why it didn't occur to you earlier! 111 it and hopefully you'll soon have it sorted, and she'll feel much better soon!

She needs medical attention. She has an infected wound and a fever.

So that other people think twice when giving in to their very young children wanting something they are just not mentally capable of understanding

She needs medical attention, not to have you faffing about with antiseptic spray.

Piercings can get very nasty, very quickly and she'll likely need antibiotics and to have the earrings removed at the hospital. Please take her today.

Okay so firstly no judgement here as it happened to my DDs ears but she was younger than yours. Yes I did regret it but I did need to pin her down in the end as the infection can spread and with the ear so close to the brain it’s really really not good. You need to treat it quickly.

Secondly please use salt water and not table salt as it has caking agents in. You can pick up some sea salt at the supermarket that has nothing added to it. Rinse the ears and behind the studs using cotton pads dipped in the warm salt water. It will clear it up in no time and then you can remove them.

Could you put her in the bath/shower to try to get some water on it?

Either way they’ve got to get near her ear!

As she's feeling unwell I would definitely call 111 for advice now.
I would be concerned about infection or possible sepsis if not treated with antibiotics.
Please call 111.

My husband says he doesn't want to bother anyone as her fever is so slight, 37.8c. She's crashed out on the sofa, having eaten nothing all day. What do I do?

You take her to see someone as she has an infected open wound and is clearly unwell!

Take her to a walk in centre tonight.

You take her to see someone.

Call 111 - they'll help

Don't touch the earring, don't take it out.

Phone 111, get proper advice.

In the Iinterim, pop child in a cool shower, help her wash, make sure to give the ear a gentle but thorough rinse under the running shower, spray with the antiseptic spray when she gets out.

Call 111 or take her to see someone tonight. Sepsis can be life threatening and develop very quickly. Always, always better to rule it out and be safe xxx

Soak cotton wool in cooled boiled salt water and let her hold to the infected site.

Emergency apt at gp surgery with doctor or nurse in the morning.

Any worsening symptoms before then, off to urgent care or consider A&E.

A grim looking skin infection with other symptoms need medical attention - i left one once and needed a lot of antibiotics and wound care

37.8 is getting very close to 38 which is considered serious that and her other symptoms and obvious infection it needs medical attention now. Please 🙏 get her it.

Soak cotton wool in cooled boiled salt water and let her hold to the infected site.

Eep, please don't use cotton wool on an infected open wound. It can so easily get caught around the earring and make things worse.

@Dalaidramailama - sound advice:
“You can pick up some sea salt at the supermarket that has nothing added to it. Rinse the ears and behind the studs using cotton pads dipped in the warm salt water. It will clear it up in no time and then you can remove them.”
Salt water has been very effective in my house for so many near-GP encounters.
For ears, I used cooked boiled water (but still nice and warm) with salt dissolved in it in an egg cup. I would sit with my head on one side and the infected ear lobe poking into the egg cup.
It worked every time, and it’s something your daughter could be involved in the preparations for. A nice warm salty bath for the ear, and you don’t need to touch it.

*Cooled booked water!

She has an infection and needs to see a doctor tonight.

Do get her medical attention.

But also know that, yes, it is ok to restrain your child for stuff like this. It’s part of being a parent - if they need medical attention / treatment, sometimes it is the kinder thing to restrain them & get it over with. A quick explanation of what is going to happen & why, lots of reassurance & sympathy, a treat afterwards, but getting the unpleasant thing over with asap - none of that is unacceptable. It’s just parenting & helping your dc with decisions they are not old enough to make for themselves.

I hope you are able to get dd seen soon, treated appropriately & she feels better very soon.

How many people need to tell you to phone 111 and get her some medical attention before you stop asking “what do I do”? You were wrong not to get her an appointment with the GP today and to allow her to go into a weekend without having sought medical attention. For goodness sake start acting like a bloody parent and phone 111 for some proper medical advice instead of posting on mumsnet.