Not to wear a bra at home with teenage sons?

[PerfectRun]

A genuine question. I don't know if I'm doing what everyone does or scarring them for life!

There me and two teen sons at home. In my own upbringing, I never saw my mother downstairs without being fully dressed, she would never have dreamt of having breakfast in her dressing gown, or watching TV in PJs, for example.

In the hot weather, my standard outfit at home is shorts and a loose t-shirt with no bra. My lounge wear in the evenings is light PJ trousers and a stretch cotton cami.

If it makes a difference, I'm mid 50s, slimish and not big boobed.

They haven't said anything, but then I don't suppose they would.

Seeing your mums nips through her t shirt. Delightful.

I walk around naked and always have. My 3 DC don't even notice. Something my parents always did so seems ok to me too.x

Why is the absence of a bra under clothes more inappropriate / sexual / whatever than the presence of an ornate sexualised bra under clothes at work / in public ?

What if you're nodding approvingly at your female colleague for having the correct bra-outline under her smart work shirt but she's wearing some Ann Summers monstrosity or nipple tassels?

People are ridiculous.

Also had breast cancer so one boob is smaller than the other. Don't sweat the small things x

I always take my bra off when I get back from work, I don't think DS is overly bothered as long as I listen to his monologue on the new plane he has on his latest game, including looking it up and oohing and aahing at how fabulous it is.

My Father has a habit of turning up early on a weekend morning when I am still in my PJ's, he also doesn't appear overly bothered by my low hanging norkage.

If I have to answer the door to the postman/delivery drivers, I hide most of it from view with the door

Do what you want! Why would they care, they can't see anything it's not like you're topless!

Who cares? Just don't look.

I'm sure she has seen much worse from them!

Pretty sure both sons have seen them before now. If they object, just remind them when. You'll never hear a word out of them on the subject again.

They’re teenagers. You’ll be lucky if they look up from their screens to acknowledge your existence. Wear or don’t wear what you want.

Not wearing a bra is fine. They might feel uncomfortable if you're not wearing a top either but I can't imagine them caring about what's under your clothes! I assume they'd rather not think about it either way.

Honestly it comes down to personal preference/feelings. Not wearing a bra makes me feel completely exposed and i hate it, even in a room by myself/wearing several layers like t-shirt and jumper. As such the only time i don't have one on is when showering.

As for other women braless in public, to me it looks/feels very sleazy, and something very obvious that men in particular are going to notice/ogle at. It just feels much more conservative and respectable to cover up. You wouldn't walk round with it obvious you've got no knickers on, so why do so without a bra on.

As for your teen boys, it could be very awkward for them with you being their mum. They're obviously aware you have breasts, and nipples are much more prominent without a bra on. They can't help but notice it im sure, and it may be too embarrassing for them to bring it up to you. I HATE when my dad walks round in just his underwear, it just feels obscene, i certainly wouldn't walk around in just my underwear around him! I've brought it up so many times but he just lives in his underwear only once home, and seemingly he doesn't care how uncomfortable it makes me.

I think it's a lot more problematic to be appraising people's bodies in enough detail to establish what kind of underwear they are wearing underneath their clothes,

Sometimes you don't need to "appraise people's bodies" to notice whether someone is wearing underwear or not.

Don't you remember the fuss made when Charlie Dimmock was on Groundforce? She was remembered more for being braless than for her gardening skills.

I don't care whether women wear a bra or not, but it is rather naive to assume that in many cases other people don't notice.

I have gone brakes at home for years (ds now young adults). I do it because it’s more comfortable (and sometimes can’t be bothered to put one on!). I actually think it’s good for dc to see women comfortable on their own bodies.

However, would never go out with one, and loved the invention of a T-shirt bra as it hides my protruding nipples (and gives me a better shape). I’m not keen on seeing people without bras in public also.

As for other women braless in public, to me it looks/feels very sleazy, and something very obvious that men in particular are going to notice/ogle at. It just feels much more conservative and respectable to cover up.

That's such a sad and depressing thing to read. I'm glad I don't think about other women or my own body that way, because it sounds horrid.

My mum walked around with no bra under her shirt/in her knickers to go to the toilet while I was brushing my teeth etc- small house with one bathroom! I credit it as part of the reason I feel so comfortable in my own body to be honest!

I wouldn’t in front of their friends by your boys won’t even notice!

I had breakfast with my young adult stepson yesterday and I was still wearing my pyjamas. Pretty sure he wouldn't have noticed or cared that I didn't have a bra on. It hadn't even crossed my mind there could be a potential issue.

Don't you remember the fuss made when Charlie Dimmock was on Groundforce? She was remembered more for being braless than for her gardening skills.

Where we differ is that I judge the people who fixated on her underwear choices, not her.

The same way I judge the people who blame a rape victim for her outfit choices rather than blaming her rapist. Conceptually the point you are making is the same as people who condemn rape victims for their skirt length or underwear choice.

I'm not naive, I just don't have any time for this particular manifestation of sexism and am not prepared to pretend it has value. It doesn't.

Blimey. Hadn't considered some of these posts.

As for other women braless in public, to me it looks/feels very sleazy, and something very obvious that men in particular are going to notice/ogle at. It just feels much more conservative and respectable to cover up.

That is entirely your problem though isn't it. Rest assured that I really couldn't give a stuff what ridiculous judgement you might make about me.
I don't know that I've ever really aimed to be conservative and covered up. Respectability is a matter of opinion.

OP, I think it's good that your teens have a mum who looks like a woman and doesn't make clothing decisions based on what other people think she should wear.

Currently sat on the sofa with a night-shirt on. Sons never bat an eyelid.

I always wear a top no bra at home. Small boots though so doubt no one notices!

Where we differ is that I judge the people who fixated on her underwear choices, not her.

We don't differ actually. I agree with you, but I'm not naive enough to pretend it doesn't happen. It shouldn't happen but it does. I used the Charlie Dimmock example to illustrate just how many people do notice these things.

I don't think my teenage son would even notice, I breastfed him for over a year yhe fact I have breasts is not s secret. However he also has sisters, so an entirely female household and I imagine he would get an earful if he ever suggested how a women should dress and vice versa.
We are all mature and respectful enough to know bodies are just bodies and if we are all cool and comfortable especially in our own homes life is so much easier for everyone living there.

How would you really know if someone 'batted an eye lid' or not?

Ohhh pffft, fuck that 😂
As in I'm currently sat here braless, it gets to this time of night and in this heat, it's coming off lol.
I've two teenage sons, doubt they'd be too traumatised by me getting comfortable, it's not like I'll massive knockered anyway so they probably haven't even noticed any difference 😂