To not go on holiday as it's too much stress/effort

[ParkLife232]

I would love to have a little holiday with dh and dc (ideally), just a couple of nights away not too far in the UK but we've decided it's just too difficult. We've got a lively son who's just turned 4 and an equally lively little girl who's just turned one. Life can be exhausting just doing day to day stuff, let alone a holiday. We've only been away for 1 night within an hour of home as a family of 4 and even that was stressful.

How do others parents make holidaying look so easy? Is the stress of going on holiday actually worth it.

I don’t get why it’s that stressful.
Do you never go on day trips? Stay with family?

I think it's your time frame - with small dc I found that you often need as much planning and nearly as much stuff to go away for 2 days and for 7. And obviously with camping you need to take everything. Maybe aim for a longer break but one where more is provided there for you, like a caravan type holiday?

I’ve had fab holidays, mediocre ones and damn right stressful ones with my 3.

To be honest I think family holidays can be over rated but I do look back at certain photos with rose tinted specs!!

Not in a rush to go on one this year and definitely don’t feel like we are missing out.

A change of scenery
2 adults and 2 kids can’t be too hard

Could you go for longer? I sometimes think it’s not worth the hassle for a short trip. Maybe 3 nights minimum.

Have you thought about staying in a static caravan park with kids activities to tire out the four year old? E.g Soft play, splash pool

A couple of nights in one place is easy.
Self-catering is good so you can give them familiar food if necessary. If travelling by car thake their pillow & blanket or even the quilt for sleeping.

But the most important thing I found when holidaying with young children is ensuring there is a safe space for them to run around: yep the dreaded park/ playground or even a soft play!
It's just home from home at that age!

Make sure you and your DH are having time off work, all you are entitled to, even if you don't go away. No looking at work emails for example.

I've never found holidays with my dc stressful tbh.

You need to choose your holidays wisely. It doesn't take much to please me as long as I'm left in peace. Therefore, if the children are happy, I'm happy.

Factor on that we do home exchanges for almost every holiday so not only do I have to pack all and sundry for me and 2 small kids, I also have to scrub the house to a high standard before I can even set foot out the door. I've done so for years and there are pros but I've told my husband I need a break from exchanges as I'm stressed and shattered before we've even set off, I'm done! 🙅

I find the trick is to find somewhere that suits to go on holiday - like a pp said, a pool and a play park and kids activities, and plan for easy meals and eating out often in kid friendly places.

I hated self-catering, because frankly it's not a holiday if I have to think of meals outside of breakfast, so we eat out or take pre-cooked stuff back to accommodation, which means it feels a bit more like a break.

And I agree - it's as much work going away for 1 night with small kids as it is a week, so better to make it longer and feel like an actual holiday.

My kids loved Butlins, it wasn't my idea of fun, but they loved it - we booked a dining package (no cooking) and there was so much for them to do, they had a whale of a time. To the point dd asks to go back even when we suggested going abroad somewhere sunny.

We always had a holiday no matter what the age of the kids, either U.K. or overseas. Plenty of child friendly things to keep them occupied

IME holidays with babies are rubbish but once mine were about 2 we started enjoying ourselves again. I guess it’s probably down to the way you operate as a family a lot of the time. We did contact naps, co-sleeping etc very “attachment” style which I know some people would say makes things easier, but I just found it harder to do these things outside of our normal environment. When ours were very little we tended to just do day trips or visit family for weekends.

We found caravans and chalets and cottages set up for families good at that age.
Most have cots and high chairs etc
Norfolk Somerset wales north Devon were great at that age Lots of child friendly activities

Now I have teens and getting them
To do anything is a battle.

Enjoy them now before they grow up.

I think it often depends on your attitude. Expect stress -> feel stress.

I'm taking my nearly 2 year old abroad while pregnant just the two of us for a 5 day mini break - just because. Yeah I'll be tired sometimes but I can't wait!

YABU

You can make some lovely memories with young DC on holiday.

Maybe consider going away for longer or teaming up with some friends or family?

A self catering cottage for a week will give you time get into a routine and relax

Two words: all inclusive

YANBU. 3 and 1 year old here. Holidays are just same shit, different location.

I mean it’s nice to take them to the beach but only when the 3 year old isn’t whinging because there’s sand on her foot (yes it’s the beach, there will be sand…) and the 1 year old is overtired because she refused to nap and now she won’t eat anything so she’s also hangry… etc etc.

Agree that one or two nights is as much of a PITA as 7 so if you are really determined to do a holiday I would either:

1. stay in the UK and book a holiday cottage for a week, somewhere with an enclosed kid friendly garden, a proper kitchen, and separate bedrooms for you an the DC

1. Do a shorter break but very near to home (within an hour?) and do something a bit more “adventurous” (read: tortuous) like camping but then take the rest of the week off work just you and DH and send the kids back to nursery so you get a break

or if you can afford it

1. All inclusive somewhere with a kids club and some sun, 2-3 hour flight away.

What is really worth it at that age is a late autumn or winter holiday abroad when the weather of awful here but just nice in the Canary Islands or Madeira or Sicily. The joy or spending a couple of weeks nice and warm in the winter is worth the hassle and normally pretty cheap

What is it you are finding stressful? We've been on lots of holidays with children and not found this.

I don't understand what's stressful.

I mean yes, packing and organising can be a bit. There's always a last minute 'omg I forgot to buy suncream' or a 'why did you wear those shorts today, they were ready to pack' type situation. I imagine it's similar for everyone.

But the actual holiday itself makes up for it surely?

After the U.K. beach holiday with a baby plus toddler where they both cried at everything, wouldn’t sleep, wouldn’t eat, needed far too much stuff and the most fun toddler had was watching an ants nest at a motorway service station on the way home I barely took mine anywhere overnight until school age. At which point they were old enough to behave appropriately, need far less kit, cope with less than perfect sleep/food and were actually interested in where we were. At that point holidays weren’t exactly relaxing, but they were fun. Before then we did local days out - they weren’t old enough to care we were at the castle/playground/lake down the road instead of one the other end of the country!

If I was going away with younger children again I’d go somewhere not very far, with lots of stuff to do on site, a pool and self catering but with restaurant options. I know it’s a marmite thing, but I’d say a caravan/holiday park or Center Parcs.

We always did caravans at that age.

@Penguinfeather781 that's exactly it! Everything you've described. Plus, my son would be exactly the same with the ants nest! 😂 I guess the good thing is, they're easily pleased with simple pleasures at that age.