To not go on holiday as it's too much stress/effort

[ParkLife232]

I would love to have a little holiday with dh and dc (ideally), just a couple of nights away not too far in the UK but we've decided it's just too difficult. We've got a lively son who's just turned 4 and an equally lively little girl who's just turned one. Life can be exhausting just doing day to day stuff, let alone a holiday. We've only been away for 1 night within an hour of home as a family of 4 and even that was stressful.

How do others parents make holidaying look so easy? Is the stress of going on holiday actually worth it.

I love holidaying in the UK, it's so easy. Even when DS was a toddler I loved it.

Compared to all that airport/queuing/ferries/passports/parking/hotel vouchers/currency/delays/cancellations hassle, I love being able to put the bikes and a couple of bags in the car and hit the road at 3am.

Although the last two weeks I've had off work, ds is off school and we've stayed at home. We've been cycling, picnicing, visiting, swimming, cooked nice food, been out to supper. I spent most of today in the garden on my sun lounger with a book. 😎

We've just come back from 4 nights away with our kids who are the same age as yours and tbh I am exhausted. I'm glad we went as it was a great break for them but for me personally it was much harder than being at home. Sleeping arrangements for starters, and the difficulty of having to coax fussy eater DD into eating different food etc. Difficult car journeys and trying to find play parks, activities for each day. They had a whale of a time, I've come back ready to drop.

I see it as important for the kids to have a break from childcare and lots of time together as a family rather than any kind of relaxing experience for me, and that helps. Agree with the advice to make it as easy on yourself as possible when choosing a child friendly destination.

I had two little one with additional needs and the easiest holiday we ever had was a Hotel in the West Country just across the road from the beach. This was 20 years ago now.

It was so easy. They did a high tea for little ones at 5pm, so everyone had children with them. No judgment.
Parents could choose to at with them but were encouraged to get them to sleep and use the listening service and dress for dinner.

They had an indoor pool, tasteful children's entertainers and a fabulous beach to wander over to.

It was a really old fashioned bucket and spade holiday that catered for adults with children. It reminded me of similar hotels in the west country with high tea for the children in the 1970's.

If these sorts of holidays still exist I'd recommend them for the ease of it all.

Can totally relate and have the same philosophy re: trips to the park, local attractions being enough for dc in the earlier years.

I'm an avid traveler, but have only had one holiday since I was pregnant with my now 2.5 year olds.

I've just had two weeks off work - we did day trips to the beach/ aquarium/ forest/ different play parks etc. We had picnic lunches and ate out a few times. I got new toys for the garden (playhouse, picnic bench). The twins said they loved their "holidays".

I think I probably won't go abroad with them, till they're old enough to not need a buggy. Next summer I might go to a fairly local hotel for a couple of nights with them.

Totally agree. Such a lot of bloody hassle. Even down to sorting the fridge, the pets, the watering of the garden, the packing, the washing...Fuck that I say. Plenty of time when they're older. Do what's easiest for you OP. Stop comparing what you do with what others do.

Yep. It's not really a holiday, but try to get it as enjoyable for you as possible.

Not too much travelling. - 1 hour from home is fine.

Do not share a hotel room with your DC, please God. You need an apartment or cottage with access to safe outdoor space. Center parcs maybe?

Lower your expectations. You'll be doing the same shit as at hone, but at least it will be different scenery. Playgrounds and soft play. Gardens and beach walks.

Don't try to eat out. Put the kids to bed and order in a take away. A balcony or a view is nice!

Take turns with your DH so that you each get to go off and do a pleasant adult activity alone - spa/gallery/golf/ whatever and the other one watches the kids. Or better yet, get a place with a kids club!! Although the 1 year old is probably too young for that yet.

I've travelled a lot with 2 pre schoolers and really enjoyed it. I think the change of scenery does everyone good, particularly during the drudgery of the baby stage.

I found hotels with buffet restaurants preferable to self catering and going abroad somewhere better than UK because neither of mine were good in the car.

Our only disaster was a trip to Cornwall during the pandemic where the big one kept throwing up (she gets car sick), the little one wouldn't stop screaming and we got stuck in traffic for hours. It then rained so we had to find things for DC indoors all week. I swore never again so our next holiday was a nice hotel in Mauritius with a kids club, a vast improvement!

Totally agree mine are the same age it's exhausting at this age it's more for them than you, we are doing a weekend at a caravan park half an hour away. I'm looking at abroad next year but I think it will just be hard work and I'm really on the fence if I want to spend a few grand to run around putting suncream on and stop my kids drowning 24/7 plus my kids don't sit still for more than about ten minutes in a restraunt. Much prefer chilling at home and in the garden as all child proofed and suitably shaded. Now what is a real break is taking a days leave when your kids are in childcare and sleeping

We've just had a week in Majorca with a 2.5 yr old and 9 month old. The first few days were stressful and then we learnt a routine that worked for us. Honestly I'm really missing being away now and I'm sad to be home! I think next time we'll try for 10 days so we get a full week after the hecticness of the first couple of days. I've been away in the UK with just my son before and didn't have as good a time. I think there's something special about being abroad, so I'd try to do that again in future.

Nothing ever entertained my children like a beach so we found a week by the sea the perfect holiday whenvthey were little. I personally wouldn't bother with two days - all the hassle of packing and getting settled only to go again. I'd say 5 days minimum.

I agree, OP. Getting everything ready is such a faff and then, arriving exhausted, you still have to do everything you would do at home, only in a less safe environment. To make it worth it for me, I either need to be going away with relatives who will share childcare or there needs to be kids club/ creche where the kids can go for a few hours a day. And I will not cook... at all! Any holiday that depends on me cooking will not get past the concept stage!

No wonder you’re shattered! Did your husband never help?

I like a change of scene. We get a cottage or Airbnb so it's got most things we need. I can do an odd night in a hotel with them but for a few days I much prefer getting an apartment/cottage. I do 2 days a week solo with the two kids every week so actually having another adult there is a break for me!. We've had some great holidays, it's just completely different to the holidays we used to have.

Don't really understand what you mean. I've taken my kids to hotels, holiday homes,.mountain villages and on city breaks to experience new foods and have fun. They wake up, you plan a small day, you eat, you sleep. Sure, if you think parenting is 'shit' and you're going to resent not being able to go clubbing or climbing Everest or something, you probably won't have a good time. That's not an attitude I've ever understood.

YABU. Nothing much is ever going to be low stress with young DCs but it is very stressful never to have a change of scene and an escape from the normal household chores.

If you're self catering, make sure meals are easier/more luxurious meals than what you would have at home.

As PPs have said, staying somewhere kid friendly is key.

We did Centre Parcs and static caravans next to beaches at that age.
But I agree, holidays can be very stressful. I’m stressing about mine now, I’ll be glad to get home and back into routine.

I found holidays with small children exhausting and not worth the stress or money. It was just looking after children without the conveniences of home.

you get a window when they are 10-14 years when family holidays are fun.

holidays with older teens have their own challenges because everything is boring for them. But you can go out and do things without them so it’s not all bad.

Try a very modest fully kitchen b@b near a large green open space and near a park and near apub/restaurant that actually does really really good children's food menu.

But low cost and maybe 30 minute drive from landmark or beach.

Like bowland forest area

All the best

All inclusive holidays in Europe

Short flights, SO much for the kids (we go to First Choice holiday villages)

Just back from Majorca with three kids including a 4 month old baby.

It's easy. Really.

Could I know where is the west country?

I love my holidays and never found it stressful or exhausting with the kids.

If you're wanting to be stressed out, just one night (why?) on the UK's crappy roads just to come back the following day should do it.

Get yourself off where the weather is good and the kids will be entertained properly

The only holiday I found relaxing when I had a preschooler was Center Parcs. Everything on site, no cars, fab pool, loads of play parks, child friendly etc. I know it gets a lot of criticism but it is the only holiday where I actually relaxed.

We have always travelled a lot, from a night in a travelodge to UK breaks plus longer holidays both shorthaul and longhaul. There's nothing better than being removed from all the distractions and tasks of home to properly engage with your children and enjoy their company. Sure it takes some effort to prepare but we still speak fondly of holidays from years ago. It's what you make it, go in with the right attitude and you'll have a ball. Small children don't need much to entertain them, a ball, a bucket and spade etc

When my dcs were little my rule was that holidays had to be a holiday for me otherwise I was not going.
Different people enjoy different things.
Camping us my idea of hell. Why do it? Seriously. I’d much rather stay in the comfort of my own home.
Whereas caravan holidays on a site with a pool and play area and children’s activities were great when we had a young family.
Maybe just day trips would be the answer.