To leave 16 yr old at home alone for 2 weeks

[FanGurlll]

For various reasons DS, 16, doesn't want to come on holiday this year.
Would you leave your 16 year old home alone?

For a comparison, a couple of months ago I had to rush my dog to an emergency vet just before 13 year old DD, who had never been left alone for even half hour before this, finished school. I expected to only be an hour or 2 but ended up being there until almost 11pm! I got home and all the doors were locked, she had cooked herself an easy dinner and washed up, walked the other dog, showered, got everything ready for school the next day, and was sound asleep in bed.

im not saying you failed but somethings gone wrong there and it might be time to start teaching him some life skills and now to be responsible. He’s going to be an adult in just 2 years.

Haha, yes call social services immediately because a 16 year old is home alone!

No wonder you kid hasn’t an ounce of maturity.
pathetic.

Ok petal. You’re great 👌

I think it is absolutely possible for a 16 year old to be left alone for 2 weeks and be absolutely fine. However, I don't think it is something that should be done unless you've put the effort in and built up to it gradually - its too much to go from never alone (or even one night alone) to 2 weeks alone.

As part of bringing up children it really is neglectful if you've failed to teach them the life skills to look after themselves independently by the age of 16. However, a just turned 16 year old won't necessarily have had the opportunity to practice those independent skills sufficiently to be alone for two whole weeks.

Our 16 year old has been left multiple times for one night alone, several times for 2 or 3 nights. Sometimes fully alone, sometimes with his 17 year old sibling. We will be leaving him for 5 nights this summer. We'll pop back once in the middle to ferry him to and from a friends house (we're local, but staying elsewhere providing respite for a family member who is a carer). He will neither be scared/worried/anxious about being alone, nor will he be throwing a party or doing anything irresponsible. We've put the effort in to teach him these age appropriate life skills, in the same way as we taught him other age appropriate skills earlier on in his life. It's our job as parents to teach them to grow into independent adults!

Overnight maybe, but two weeks is far too long.

No, I wouldn’t. Ds3 was 16 earlier this month. I would leave him overnight in an emergency but not for longer. Fortunately he is still happy to come on holiday with us. Definitely try bribery and the promise of a different arrangement next year.

Bloody hell, I left home at 16 😳

It was meant to be a lighthearted response, focusing on the fact he put the tv on for the dog! I can see why people leave mumsnet.

your DD sounds really mature 😊 I hope DDog is ok.

ds16 can be a bit immature for his age but has always been capable of looking after himself and ds13 when needed, just he doesn’t think sometimes. I’m almost always in so he’s never had to lock up on a nighttime and I don’t know how the oven was left on, he’s pretty good usually, can cook a range of meals and is ok tidying up. I do think he was distracted.

we talked about him staying home next week when we go away, with nana checking in on him every day but he decided he didn’t want to miss out.

It probably is. 'D'H is having a problem with his relationship with the truth. Meanwhile his 16 year old has grown up, learned to look after himself, his younger brother and, when needed, his mother. While also doing GCSEs, and recovering from a major surgery.

No idea why I still want the bastard to come home and work things out.

I am the eldest and was left alone at 16 for 10 days. Moved my boyfriend in (parents were aware of this) and I think on the whole I'm a well behaved well adjusted adult. Tbf, I didn't have any wild parties, had a few mates round but they were all older about 17/18 for pizza and a few beers. No trouble though. Depends on how mature they are?

I can see why people leave mumsnet.

Coming from the person that started the ridiculous name calling that’s pretty rich

Surprised at no life skills at 16…….that’s not good.
Why are kids today so dependant, serious question, not being goady…just gobsmacked that it’s the majority saying no way you would leave them.

Ok petal. You’re still great.

Er no. Two weeks far too long

My parents went away for a week, I had friends round the whole time, drank, had fun. No harm done

My parents went away for a week when I was 14, maybe 15, and I moved out and got my own flat when I was 16.
Unless DS is immature or you don't trust him, why wouldn't you?

@Livinginanotherworld Bonkers isn't it! Glad it's not just me!
& across so many threads posters express astonishment when ther encounter a "man child"😂

This site is bonkers.

Word.

It really is no wonder so many teens struggle at university or when they start work.

This is nothing. There was a thread the other day where a woman wanted to impose a 9.30 curfew on her 18 (might have been 20) year old. The reason for the 9.30 curfew was because the adult child wouldn't stick to the 10pm curfew.

This site really is nutcase central.

Absolutely not. Far too young!

I'm pretty sure I did a week at 16 (only child) but not 2. Partly because of some of the practical things - I obviously had no car and couldn't get any significant shopping locally (no internet groceries then). Dog needed walking etc. and I was out during daylight hours at college or work. No mobiles so if they wanted to check up on me I had to be in! I think it would be easier to set things up now.

I moved 2 hours away for college at 17 but I would have been so scared and lonely in the house by myself for a fortnight.