For thinking SAHMs are making themselves financially vulnerable

[PeasOff]

Would or do you depend on your partner financially?

Do you have a backup in place in case of breakup or for your retirement?

@worriedatthistime

I've never seen anyone say wm shouldn't ever be criticised because they choose to be a wm

I'm not sniping at sahms though.

@Topgub how do you know they do ?

@PeasOff yes its lucky they could make those alterations many cannot
If you both work in min Paid jobs with corresponding shifts it can be impossible
Realistically how many people do you know where noTh work full time and need no childcare

The choice does entrench sexist values though.

So you and others on here who've claimed that looking after one's own small children is an offence against equality, presumably you want women not to have that choice?
That doesn't sound like feminism to me.

I also agree that men who want to take that role should be encouraged to. But it seems that those who do are treated as pariahs a lot of the time.

@Topgub well its coming off as though you are to a few posters

@Topgub I'm calling troll now, maybe I'm a man, grow up 🤣

@worriedatthistime

I cant help your perception

"I'm not sniping at sahms though."

Topgub. Seriously, are you for real? Sniping at SAHMs is all you ever do! Day in day out, You are infamous for it on MN.

@HappyMeal564

Lol.

I've been accused of it at least twice since joining mumsnet

@worriedatthistime you're making an awful lot of assumptions about their personal setup/circumstances!

@saraclara its only sexist when they say it seems , encouraging a shift in working patterns , more working parental rights for men would be the better Pattern
Wfh and flexible working allows often for a much better childcare balance
If myself and dh were in our current roles when the kids were little we really could of both worked full time , with minimal childcare and both involved .

@malika3

Ooooohhh

Infamous

Is there like a wee group where you meet up to throw darts at my comments?

@PeasOff bit like you about sahm really and she said they worked nearly full time with no childcare so no assumptions made there

@saraclara

I looked after my own small children.

Feminsm is about achieving equality not choice

@Topgub fuck me you're infamous on here already!!! I should have come over here quicker to stake my claim to some of the notoriety 🤣

@Topgub mmm you do seem to think you are better than sahm , the way you come across and really you need to mind your own business about what others do

@Topgub of course its about choice as well

@PeasOff yet you claim to be a first time poster but didn't search the topic first

@worriedatthistime what assumptions have I made about SAHMs? Still waiting for someone to point out comments where I've shamed or blamed SAHMs!

@worriedatthistime

I don't think I'm better than sahms

I dont need to mind my own business either

I'm allowed opinions. I'm allowed to express them on a thread specifically asking for them

@Topgub also what you did has nothing to do with what others do
You really need to worry less about how others live their lifes and concentrate on your own and your choices
If your happy with your choices then carry on and leave others to make their own decisions

@worriedatthistime why would I search the topic first? Is it a MN rule or requirement?

I joined today - no need to lie about it. I posted elsewhere before.

Took 12 years out as no nearby relations & would have only made any money after childcare costs in a 5-week month, so we decided (as a couple) that our relationship & our family would do better without the stress of two jobs & juggling timetables / holifldays. If my career had had a definite career path or we'd had family support nearer (or younger) then maybe we'd made a different decision. In the meantime I did lots of volunteering - NCT sales, pre-school committee, PTA, governing & organising local events, plus kept my IT skills up.

It took 18 months to get the job I wanted - school admin with school holidays - mainly because so many others want them but my voluntary skills got me plenty of interviews. Ironically got employment just before DH went full-time WFH as result of C-19 so there's still someone still at home for them now.

I think doing what makes you & your partner the most relaxed & happy it's what's good forb your relationship.

@Topgub then expect opinions back that don't align with yours and yes you have made snidey comments about others choices

I joined MN years ago but only really started to get involved recently. I think I need to learn the rules as well 😂