To be upset that someone thought I was 16 years old when I'm in my late 20s

[bluebirdsz]

I'm 28 and today I was at the hairdressers and the hair stylist asked me how old I was, when I said I was 28 she looked surprised and said she guessed I was 16 or 17. She then went onto say she expected me to be a lot younger as I'm very quiet and shy.

It's made me feel quite down to be honest. I know I'm quiet and shy but it's making me worry that my colleagues and clients don't/won't take me seriously. I don't think I look 16/17, but I admit I can come across as somewhat innocent and naive but I'm not sure how to change that

I’d be delighted- I’m mid 40s but people often guess I’m 50 😂. To be fair my ex and I looked very young in our 20s and people coming to the door of the house we jointly owned regularly asked to speak to our parents. We got ID checked in blockbusters for a 15 when we were mid20s. I’m now absolutely awful at guessing peoples ages as lots of people just look ‘young’. I honestly wouldn’t take it to heart.

Why would you change it? It's bizarre to me that being a quiet introvert means you must be a teenager - plenty of teenagers are complete gobshites! I'm mid 40's and an introvert that would be described as quiet and shy. 3 people thought I was my dh's daughter last year - I'm 6 months older than him. When you get to my age you appreciate looking younger!

Your clients and colleagues will take you seriously if you are good at your job, concentrate on that would be my advice rather than trying to be something you're not.

Only 16 when nearly 30? Ouch, not sure if that's a compliment or not! Because you have fab skin, dress like or behave like a child?

Cue the flurry of patronising ‘you should be flattered, I don’t see what the problem is’ replies

To be honest I don’t know how someone in their late 20s can look 17, sounds like quite a bitchy thing to say from her part.

I do know how you feel,people always think I’m much younger than I am, it’s frustrating isn’t it. especially in a professional setting. I don’t have much advice, just Try not to let it get you down and don’t change who you are. And think how good you’ll look when you’re older, that’s what I keep telling myself 😁

I can see that might be annoying. But just wait til you're in your 50s. You're going to be absolutely delighted when someone takes you for 10 years younger. Swings and roundabouts.

I used to get this and then suddenly didn’t which really made me think about how much I’ve aged!

Yeah I must say the first time the cashier hit that ‘customer is clearly over 25’ button on the self serve did hurt a little 😂

You're 28 and it sounds like it's the first time anyone has ever said this to you, is that right? I mean you don't mention that it's a common thing?

Wait till they look at you in horror when you tell them your age. Ouch

When I was 28 and on a plane one time, I was told by the flight attendant that I couldn’t sit next to the emergency evacuation door unless I was 18 or over. I was half flattered, half humiliated.

Alternatively: She looked like an idiot for thinking it, let alone saying it, and she is the one who should be upset.

There's nothing to be upset about - one person said something thoughtless and stupid to you, it reflects badly on them not you.

And honestly, coming across as innocent and naive when you're not either of those things is loads better than the other way around! Nothing wrong with subverting expectations in the workplace...

Some people just do look younger than they are, I certainly wouldn't feel insulted by that. But it shouldn't be anything to do with how shy and quiet you are – that's quite rude, I think. You don't have to be loud and noisy to be taken seriously at work, OP, it doesn't reflect on your ability to do your job.

Why would she be delighted? I'm in my late 50's and regularly get told that and it just irritates me. I happen to have good genes. So what, it's not really worthy of discussion.

I am well into my thirties and people constantly still think I'm a kid.
I had the pretty much same experience at a hairdressers too.
She sounds weird and unprofessional to point out the shy and quiet thing though. Inappropriate in my opinion.
Sorry you feel upset, I do get it x

I had this all the time and hated it. Was humiliating and made me feel they had no confidence I could do my job well. Now I would love to be taken for half my age.

No she won’t. I’m 41 and I’m often mistaken for my son’s sister. It absolutely mortifies him. This happens every time I speak about my children. You don’t look old enough to have children that age. It’s so patronising. Most people pin me at 27 max. My Dad is the same. I have no skin care regime and lead a less than healthy life style.

It's 15, isn't it?

Its incredibly unlikely that you pass for 16 at your age OP!!!

she was probably exaggerating to make her self look interesting/individual

Or she is plain stupid.

Some people can't seem to judge age at all. They're often wildly wrong.

I look much younger than I actually am so I had the same thing. I used to be upset but now I thank them.

It can get a bit annoying sometimes. I once popped in to an opticians to pick up my brother’s contact lenses and they asked if I was in my way home from sixth form. I was about 35.

I’m hypermobile though and apparently that makes you look young.

The optician asked if you were on your way home from 6th form? What an odd thing to say.

Other than on mumsnet I’ve never heard of a 28 year old woman who looks 16. If it was that common why can they never find an actor in their 20s/30s to realistically portray teens and kids on TV? But you’ll soon have a flurry of those insisting they can’t even drop their child to nursery without being carried off and popped in a high chair by staff who mistake them for a little toddler.

She was probably just talking nonsense or making a point that you’re really quiet. I don’t know why but being quiet/shy invites comments.

That’s interesting! My husband is hyper mobile and looks like a teenager and he’s nearly 40! I’m 10 years younger than him but look about his age 🥲

Christ 35 year old 6th formers. Maybe she’d been watching too much Glee or Buffy the Vampire Slayer and had a skewed idea idea of what a teenager looks like in real life. Either that or she was a patient at the opticians, waiting for her new specs.