Inventing your own nickname

[OldClothes]

I know I'm probably unreasonable but here goes.

A young volunteer colleague of mine calls herself by her nickname and seems to want everyone to use it. It relates to her first name but it's not a common variant and is barely shorter than her actual name.

It's also very informal - the sort of thing someone might be called at school by their close friends, but most of us barely know her. AIBU to find this a tiny bit annoying?

Just call her by the name she wants to be called.

YABU.

I don’t see what your problem is? I have a name that I hate the shortened version of. If someone tries to call me that, I politely correct them. Just call her by the name she wants to use. Unless she wants you to call her honey bun or something!

Its rude not to use the name she uses for herself.

She can ask to be called by any name she wants. Why is it so much of an issue?

It's not a big issue, but some of the older members of staff feel a bit silly saying a slightly juvenile nickname.

I do agree with you, but based on context. I am happy to call someone Andy or Jan or Sue or whatever. I would draw the line at Numbnuts or Dickface or Crazy Bobby or something. That's not for the workplace.

I had a client once call us up - now, this is financial services and our department handled legal advice and financial legislation. There was a certain level of professionalism expected. And the banker on the screen was Darren, which was fine. But he interrupted me and said "Call me Dazza."

Now... honestly, my calls are recorded and I had every reason to believe it would not be looked upon favourably if I started calling our clients 'Dazza'. I avoided calling him anything at all for the rest of the call.

So, assuming you're not talking about Catherine wanting to be Cathy or Philip wanting to be Phil, here, but something very silly and infantile that would almost sound like you were taking the piss or mocking them if you were to say it out loud - you're not totally being unreasonable. It entirely depends on the name. Mitzy-Boo, Pookie-Pie, Slasher, Dat Ting, Loopy Luna - upper management hears you addressing people like that and it could be you in front of HR, not them.

What's the name

What is it?

@Lunalae Thanks for your thoughts. It's roughly in the same ball park as Dazza, maybe slightly sillier. It's not as daft as Mitzi-Boo etc which would really grate 😂

Then I agree - if I, a young staff member at the time, had addressed a much more senior man in a suit with a lofty title as "Dazza", I would have been in trouble. You don't always get to be called by what you want, especially if it makes other people look like they're being unprofessional.

We totally need the name though. She won't be the only one :)

YABU and disrespectful. That’s what they want to be known as so call them by their preferred name. It doesn’t matter if you find it silly.

If it's her preferred diminutive and it's not actually offensive just call her it! It's not for you to police.

I'm an Elizabeth and prefer to go by Lizzie but I've had people refuse to use it, rudely saying that Lizzie is a "silly name".

I don't see what's wrong with Dazza either. If that's your client's preferred salutation, call him Dazza. It's hardly as if he's asking you to call him Cunt face.

Come on, OP- what is it?! Can’t you give us a close equivalent?
I know what you mean though, I’d feel a bit of a twit too. (That’s not her name is it?)

The nickname is 'Rebbers'. Let's hope she doesn't see this - it's very unlikely.

That sounds like a them problem.

Rebbers 🤣🤣🤣

Good day to you Amanda
Hi, and please, call me Mandy
😱 I will NOT. How very dare you you bitch

Is Rebbers short for Rebecca? That’s a new one on me!

YABU.
It is pretty disrespectful to not call someone the name they ask to be called by

How do you get on when you meet someone with a ridiculous given name you don't 'approve of' ?
What do you do when you meet someone whose parents thought it was okay to give their dc a name that doesn't meet your list of approved names ?

Yes, I've only heard it once before.

In that case, I'm with you OP!

Why is Rebbers any worse than Becca, Becky or Bec? It's just unfamiliar.

@IsadoraQuagmire 👍🤣

I don't see the problem if it's just a variation of her name as opposed to something like 'Spermy' for e.g..

I've always hated my first name (my middle name is now a name widely mocked, unfortunately) and since I was in school have decided to just go by my last name. The number of colleagues and people I've met over the years who have insisted on calling me by my first name (which I try to hide as much as possible) is staggering. My last name even works as a not unpopular first name so it's not as if I'm going around asking people to call me, say, Pfeffel.