Do you say thank you…

[Summersummersummertime77]

When someone has cooked you a meal?

Parents staying with us and we went to get fresh fish from the fish market then to the shop. We made a salad, bread etc with it, made a big bbq.
Afterwards we cleaned up and no one said thank you for the meal.
Just thinking about it, would you say thank you?
It’s just my natural instinct to say ‘That was lovely, thank you’ or something along those lines…
Are my parents quite rude?

Always. In fact I say thank you umpteen times a day when someone helps me or hands me something etc.

Yes, always say thank you if someone has cooked me a meal, made me a slice of toast, a cup of tea or even just given me a crisp out of their packet! Why on earth wouldn't you?

Having said that, whilst dh and I share the cooking equally and always thank one another, we never thank each other for chores. No way am I thanking him for emptting the dishwasher or putting the bins out.

And we're definitely not religious 🙄

Very rude! They should thank you for the time and the trouble you have taken, as well as the food. If they are staying with you, do they sometimes prepare meals, or take you out, or are you doing all the work?

We're super polite in our house and yes we always thank each other when the other one has cooked. It just makes sense, I appreciate someone cooking me a meal! 🤷‍♀️

Same here. Always a thanks for food, tea, passing something over to each other etc, but I don’t say thank you for washing up and OH doesn’t either.

There’d be a very limited amount of times I’d cook for someone who couldn’t be bothered to say thanks!

@CactusBlossom Never make a meal but pay for lunches/dinners out…plus food shopping, does that sound fair?

Sounds fair. I'm sure you thank them. Ask them if they enjoyed the meal (at the time it's served). If there is a reason why not (possible allergy?) then address this. If they usually thank you, was there anything else going on? Perhaps they had had a row and weren't speaking to each other? If it still grates, I'd suggest saying you spent so much time thinking what to prepare and getting it ready, you hope they enjoyed it as much as you did. Give them the opportunity.

@CactusBlossom I said to mum when we were sat down a while later ‘That was nice, wasn’t it?’ She said ‘Yes it was lovely’

That sounds great @Summersummersummertime77

I always say thank you and am very grateful if someone makes me any food at all or goes to pick up a takeaway. It's the polite thing to do to show your appreciation. Your parents were rather rude not to say thank you.

You are absolutely right op, they were ungrateful!

I’m surprised at @Discovereads and @Topgub not saying thank you as a matter of course. Surely it’s just manners?

”Oh, thanks, love.”
For tea, for toast, for fetching the tissues, for whatever.
“Thanks, this looks great”
For meals.
To not thank someone for bringing you something is just ignorant. I’m not surprised you found it rude, OP.

Please and thank you may not be essential, in some people’s book, but I think they lubricate our interactions with each other - and while the lack of them won’t cause any major harm, it does make those interactions a bit more gritty - like a stone in your shoe.

They are so easy to say, and cost nothing, but can make life a little better - why wouldn’t I use them?

@SpiderVersed

No one said any thing about being brought anything

It was cooking/emptying dishwasher/hoovering

Sometimes I forget to say at the end, but always say thank you when I'm handed the food, and I'm always appreciative. And offer to help wash up.

Yep, always

Always say thank you when someone cooks me a meal. I had my parents round for dinner a while ago and my mum thanked me but my dad didn't.
About an hour after they left my dad phoned to apologise for not thanking me but tbhi hadn't really noticed until then.

I'm grateful for beans on toast cooked for me by someone who isn't me!

@Discovereads

Just wondering in homes where a thank you for dinner amongst family for a bog standard every day meal is essential, do you also thank God for every meal?
No we don't do this, not a particularly religious household.
I don't think manners and religion automatically go hand in hand!

Always.

I think as a "guest" yes of course, but family is a bit different. Did you say thank you every time your parents cooked for you? Do your children to you?

Yes I would have thanked you for the meal

I thank anyone who cooks for me, even if it's my husband's 'turn'. It's rude not to.

Did you say thank you every time your parents cooked for you?
I say thanks that was very nice when I've finished a meal if we've gone to my parents for tea (as in evening meal)
Maybe not as much when I was little as you got tea every night and they're you're parents and you're a kid.

Do your children to you?
No, for reasons stated above
As adults though there's no reason not to say thank you for your meal.