To be annoyed with teacher giving my child food gifts that they can't eat

[mrsfoof]

DC has a gluten intolerance. To clarify, it's 'just' an intolerance not coeliac disease, but if they eat even a little bit of it, they get bad stomach cramps and diarrhoea. DC is 10 and the school are aware of their dietary requirements and are great at providing GF school meals and always remember to provide GF ingredients when the DC does cooking in class etc.
Anyway, at Easter, all children were given an Easter egg by the teacher. All the class had the same type of egg but it contained gluten so DC couldn't eat theirs.
The same happened today - DCs were given various toys and sweets in a goody bag as an end of term gift, some of which contained gluten.
Now the gluten sweets aren't especially obviously 'gluten-y' (Smarties, Mars bars etc) so I expect it never crossed the teacher's mind to link them with the fact that they contain gluten. However, I'm a bit cross that the school are handing out foods with allergens in them to kids that can't eat them. DC knows that they are ones that they can't eat and was very gracious in just saying thank you to the teacher and giving them to their siblings to eat instead. They were a bit disappointed of course but it's not a big deal to them.
On the other hand wonder if I should mention it - what if DC was younger and ate them without checking? Should they have more robust procedures to ensure that allergens aren't given to kids who shouldn't be eating them?
And yes, I'm aware that it's highly likely that the teacher bought these with their own money and it would seem very ungrateful to 'complain'. Any letter I send would be about awareness, not complaining as such.
Or should I just keep quiet?

I wouldn't hand out any kind of food as a treat. Some children will have allergies, be gluten intolerant, or have religious beliefs that impinge on their choice of food. It's a bit of a minefield.

Its not, schools have information about dietary requirements, teachers will know them for their class.

I would have a word with the teacher, my son was given a cadbury animal bar in reception, if he had eaten any of it it could have killed him. The rule I now have with the school is that no one gives him anything food based apart from the kitchen staff.

I had presents given to me today by the children. Two children gave me alcohol. It’s really inconsiderate and lazy of the parents not to remember that I don’t drink. Honestly how difficult would it have been for them to get me something non alcoholic! Should I email them to give them a gentle reminder?

Can you listen to yourself! Take a leaf out of your daughter’s book, say ‘Thank you’ and move on.

Yes, like I said I'm not bothered (nor is DC) about 'missing out' by not being able to eat the sweets. It's more the fact that I think it's inappropriate for the school to not understand the importance of making sure that children aren't given foods that they can't eat due to allergens / religious reasons / choosing to be vegetarian.
I think no foods would be best to be honest. Some children would be seriously ill if they accidentally ate an allergen. If this was a club where they only go infrequently then fair enough. But my child has had this teacher for a year and they are well aware that they can't eat gluten but didn't think to check the ingredients before handing out sweets. I don't blame the teacher, but think that the school's policy / allergen awareness possibly needs updating.

When I was a class teacher I regularly treated the children to an end of term gift, and the children brought in sweets to share on their birthday. I had several children over the years with various allergies, some life threatening. I spoke with the parents of these children and the parents would then supply an alternative for their child to be kept in a cupboard till needed. The children concerned responded well to this arrangement. Teachers are kind enough to supply gifts and it is unreasonable to expect them to source alternatives for many different requirements.
Your son coped well in the situation and I think you are making a mountain out of a molehill.

This would not be allowed at all in my school. No edibles to be given out due to the risk of anaphylaxis.

Maybe an email directly to the teacher ? "Thank you for the gift but dc can't eat the treat as it contains gluten" .
Possibly give a list of the gluten free type of chocolate dc can have or even send an email closer to end of term times. Dh is a teacher and tries to be certain he's taken all diet issues into account but it can get a bit difficult with 30 plus kids. A gentle reminder can't go wrong. Alternatively the teacher could give non edible gifts, which is what my husband did when 2/3 of the class he taught had diet restrictions/ allergies etc. I wouldn't think the teacher would mind .

My dc’s school insisted on a doctors note for any allergies.

our gp was quite perplexed but dutifully complied to confirm his peanut allergy.

the last 2 christmases/Easter’s. He’s been the proud recipient of a chocolate Santa/bunny that clearly states on the label may contain peanuts. My other dc is in another class & was also gifted so it’s a school not a class thing.

I think if this was me, and I’d had a complaint after kindly buying my class presents out of my own money next time I just wouldn’t bother.

I'd definitely say something as a little reminder to the teacher and the school, but at the end of the day, they are only human and all humans make mistakes.

Dgs (10) is diabetic. He knows not to eat anything he is given in school. There are treats in his emergency kit that is kept in school. They have the carb count on them so that he knows how much insulin give if he’s eating one. You could leave some suitable treats in school so that your dc doesn’t miss out.

Do you fill out a form when children start in your class so that the parents are aware of your dietary needs / preferences?

Do the parents provide you with drinks every day in school so it would be hard not to remember that you don't drink alcohol?

Will the drink make you ill if you accidentally drank some of it because you didn't realise the drink contained alcohol and you or the parents had forgotten to check the ingredients first?

I don't think you can compare this to a teacher giving a pupil an allergen when they know them very well.
It's not about being ungrateful, it's about the fact that not being aware of the situation could make children ill - some quite seriously.

The teacher paid for this out of her own pocket all that will happen is she or he wont bother doing it any more.

In my child's school the mum of the kid with allergies has supplied the teacher with suitable alternatives and the teacher just swaps out. Sometimes there's a movie with popcorn as a reward or birthday sweets etc.

don't write anything email just speak withthe teacher instead.

if I was the teacher and I made a mistake like this I would rather be told as a blanket email about allergens would probably go above my head if there's no special education on what contains what etc especially if its not so obvious

YABU.

At 10, your dc should know not to eat the sweets without checking them (or checking with you). Generally speaking, I'd just teach your dc that they say thank you and then give the sweets to someone else. Not everything needs to be perfect for our children, it's just too much. At times, my dc have been given things they couldn't eat or were left out an forgotten. It's ridiculous to make a fuss of this because 'such is life'. If you micro manage everyday little disappointing experience out of your dc's life. how will they cope when you are not there to make sure everything is perfect?

I really disagree with such a degree of entitlement. The teacher won't bother next time if you bring it up. They have different kids each year with different allergies, a small simple gesture would turn into a bigger task having to check for allergies. Just teach you child to say thank you and pass it it on.

Blimey! That's awful. Yes, school have also insisted on a Drs note before they'd provide GF meals (fine, I understand).
DC has accidentally been given a normal burger bun instead of a GF one with lunch before (resulting in the inevitable diarrhoea within minutes and school insisting that they couldn't return to school for 48 hours afterwards ).

An email to the teacher? Really? After a whole year of teaching this child and, one assumes, not giving gluten-filled chocolate out, you think the OP should email the teacher to say their child can't eat this treat? What do you think the teacher can/ should do about it now they're on summer holiday? It's just going to make them feel terrible as I'm sure it was not intentional and now it cannot be rectified. The teacher isn't even the child's teacher anymore as they'll have someone new next term.

The OP should focus on getting some kind of change in place at school next term as it can only benefit the kids. But the teacher needs to be left alone now. They'll get the message when the school changes the policy regarding food gifts.

I agree with you OP. It's not on and it's completely different to a a parent gifting something to a teacher.
DD has a dairy allergy and I have to say her school are amazing; they always have an alternative for her (and the multiple other children with allergies, there are 3 in her class alone).
Email the school.

If you read my OP, you'd have seen that neither myself nor DC are ungrateful. They're not bothered about not being able to eat the sweets (it happens all the time at birthday parties etc). We would be more than happy with no sweets- we don't expect special alternatives at all.
It's more about expecting the class teacher to know better than to hand out sweets containing gluten to a child that is ill if they eat them.

The appropriate response to someone buying your kid a gift is "thank you." That's it.

Why did you dc say 'No thank you, I cannot take food gift due to my gluten allergy but I really appreciate the gesture?'

You just sounds incredibly self-entitled. Nightmare.

Personally, I wouldn’t give edibles for this reason. You can’t win. If it’s not an allergy, they can’t have colourings.

Sending an email to the school will be seen as a complaint and a sure fire way to make sure the teacher doesn’t spend on gifts again.

Before you know it the teacher will have to source 10 different products to cater for kids intolerances, religious beliefs and lifestyle choices.

Makes sense they just give out something standard that is fine for the vast majority. Parents can swap it out for something more suitable if they want to and have the original gift themselves or regift it or whatever.

I don't blame the teacher, but think that the school's policy / allergen awareness possibly needs updating.

This isn't a school gift though. It is a personal gift from an individual teacher, paid directly out of their own pocket.

I suspect all that will happen is that the teacher will feel bad and probably feel it's better to just not spend their own money on gifts in further years, to avoid the guilt.

When handing out treats we very clearly tell all children they must not open them until they are with a parent/cater who will check them first. Our eldest classes are only year 2 and they manage this.